Reviewing as of Ch. 1.
I'm very impressed with the bones of this story. There's a slight futurist vibe to it, which I quite like. The developer also clearly put a lot of effort into the characters, which are varied and plentiful, and the main character, who actually looks like a guy who would be able to get some of the girls that these games throw at you.
For a first release, it's absolutely incredible. The attention to detail and the length of the first chapter is great. The dialogue is snappy, at times quite humorous. You can already build an attachment to the characters, who are distinct from each other just by the way they tald and interact with the MC. And you can really start to get into the position of the player character, which is exactly what you want out of a VN.
The premise, however, is kind of a stretch, and it feels inconsistent in execution. Your character was badly betrayed by their girlfriend 3 years ago, but is an extremely gifted coder who apparently made revolutionary AI technology even as a high schooler. But then you've been out of work because... reasons, despite being a genius coder (and especially in a 'show me' profession like programming where it's relatively easy to get a career without a ton of professional experience if you have the technical skills and/or body of work to back it up). You literally get escorted out of a number of job interviews. Then when you finally land an interview—at a place established by many of the female characters in the game, no less—your resume is suddenly "great."
You're struggling. You can't pay rent. But apparently can see a popular psychologist multiple times a week. You've been completely destroyed by this betrayal, your life is in shambles, you can't even see your ex-girlfriend without running out of the room. But you're evidently fine to work (which begs the question why haven't you been working earlier?).
It just seems like your character's situation is fluid based on the needs of the narrative. It's neither here or there because it's exactly what the plot demands at that specific point in time.
The girls are precocious, to say the least. You room with a highly valued DJ who happens to be a robotics expert and who inherited some underground lab that looks more like the secret lair for a science fiction megavillain. You're interviewed by some fresh sorority girl college graduate who already has her own VC firm and tons of clients, who hired a bunch of ridiculously gifted sorority sisters. One of whom you had prior history with, apparently a genius biochemist who already created some kind of revolutionary birth control but is kind enough to work as a bartender in her spare time... I guess?
Oh, you get roped into being a stunt cock for some sorority initiation and now you're part of the club now, despite having graduated a few years ago. So you can now be the creeper older guy who hangs around college girls. Yay!
There seem to be no reason to make them college students in particular, other than perhaps to save the developer the headache so they can shove them all into the same sorority building. The story and believability would probably benefit from them all being older, career women.
All in all, it feels like the characters are kind of a teenage/college student's fantasy of what successful people at that point in life are like. And the situation of the MC is kind of stretched and tugged to fit whatever situation the developer needs it to be.
None of this makes the VN impossible to enjoy, of course, and the effort put into almost every facet of this first chapter is still immediately obvious. But it does pull it back from perfection. It's a very good game, but with more care paid to the story and premise, it could be great.
I'm very impressed with the bones of this story. There's a slight futurist vibe to it, which I quite like. The developer also clearly put a lot of effort into the characters, which are varied and plentiful, and the main character, who actually looks like a guy who would be able to get some of the girls that these games throw at you.
For a first release, it's absolutely incredible. The attention to detail and the length of the first chapter is great. The dialogue is snappy, at times quite humorous. You can already build an attachment to the characters, who are distinct from each other just by the way they tald and interact with the MC. And you can really start to get into the position of the player character, which is exactly what you want out of a VN.
The premise, however, is kind of a stretch, and it feels inconsistent in execution. Your character was badly betrayed by their girlfriend 3 years ago, but is an extremely gifted coder who apparently made revolutionary AI technology even as a high schooler. But then you've been out of work because... reasons, despite being a genius coder (and especially in a 'show me' profession like programming where it's relatively easy to get a career without a ton of professional experience if you have the technical skills and/or body of work to back it up). You literally get escorted out of a number of job interviews. Then when you finally land an interview—at a place established by many of the female characters in the game, no less—your resume is suddenly "great."
You're struggling. You can't pay rent. But apparently can see a popular psychologist multiple times a week. You've been completely destroyed by this betrayal, your life is in shambles, you can't even see your ex-girlfriend without running out of the room. But you're evidently fine to work (which begs the question why haven't you been working earlier?).
It just seems like your character's situation is fluid based on the needs of the narrative. It's neither here or there because it's exactly what the plot demands at that specific point in time.
The girls are precocious, to say the least. You room with a highly valued DJ who happens to be a robotics expert and who inherited some underground lab that looks more like the secret lair for a science fiction megavillain. You're interviewed by some fresh sorority girl college graduate who already has her own VC firm and tons of clients, who hired a bunch of ridiculously gifted sorority sisters. One of whom you had prior history with, apparently a genius biochemist who already created some kind of revolutionary birth control but is kind enough to work as a bartender in her spare time... I guess?
Oh, you get roped into being a stunt cock for some sorority initiation and now you're part of the club now, despite having graduated a few years ago. So you can now be the creeper older guy who hangs around college girls. Yay!
There seem to be no reason to make them college students in particular, other than perhaps to save the developer the headache so they can shove them all into the same sorority building. The story and believability would probably benefit from them all being older, career women.
All in all, it feels like the characters are kind of a teenage/college student's fantasy of what successful people at that point in life are like. And the situation of the MC is kind of stretched and tugged to fit whatever situation the developer needs it to be.
None of this makes the VN impossible to enjoy, of course, and the effort put into almost every facet of this first chapter is still immediately obvious. But it does pull it back from perfection. It's a very good game, but with more care paid to the story and premise, it could be great.
