Okay then, I have played more than a healthy number of games from this site. Most are a lot less than good. Some are ok, and just a few are excellent,
This game is among the best of them. Top notch art, quality rendering and a very attractive cast of characters.
Technicaly its mostly great, some of the animations seem a bit clunky, but that could be becasue I am playing on a 12 year old mac that has seen better days.
It's the writing and the characterisation that make this game stand out. I read a lot, have a degree in lit and an MA in psychotherapy and I (mostly) believe in these characters and their story. For an erotic VN that is a ral achievement. To the devs I'd say don't be afraid of pushing the story between Jaye and the MC over and above the MC's opportunities to get it on. At present the fact that he can seemingly fool around with both Mallory and Jaye without consequence seems to me to undermine the believability of the two main girls. Given the implied intensity of feeling I am not sure that either of the would be so comfortable with the MC's infidelity. I am assuming thata choice point is coming, Mallory or Jaye, but if it was me writing this I'd want to go back and either prefigure/telegraph their acceptace of polyamory (which given their traumatic backstories would be a hard sell) or build more tension into the relationship between them (ie Mallory and Jaye).
As things stand the writing is excellent, the character are mostly believable but the acceptance of the MC's wandering cock is acting against the believability of the two main girls. Given their characters as presented, I cannot honestly believe they would accept his slutty behaviour without some serious consequences.
I get that the genre demands a certain amout of lewd content but overall it feels like you are reaching for something more interesting than just another faptastic wankfest.
Push the tesion between Jaye and Mallory, push the MC's internal conflict .
RetCon the hell out it all so that it's not just another "I got fuck em all and now I can choose whomever without consequence." easy fantasy.
Despite all the consessions you've made to the genre you are still pushing a hard choice. If it was me writing this I'd have made it a harder choice earlier.
I mean really, if the MC actually loves Jaye, ahy is fucking around with all th others? If he doesnt and just wants her to be another notch on the bedpost then you need to puch his callousness. i don't know. I could twat on for hours, Suffice it to say that this is the only game on hear that has inspired me to think beyond my next nut...
Do what you will, I'll enjoy it however it plays out.
Top 3 game
This game is among the best of them. Top notch art, quality rendering and a very attractive cast of characters.
Technicaly its mostly great, some of the animations seem a bit clunky, but that could be becasue I am playing on a 12 year old mac that has seen better days.
It's the writing and the characterisation that make this game stand out. I read a lot, have a degree in lit and an MA in psychotherapy and I (mostly) believe in these characters and their story. For an erotic VN that is a ral achievement. To the devs I'd say don't be afraid of pushing the story between Jaye and the MC over and above the MC's opportunities to get it on. At present the fact that he can seemingly fool around with both Mallory and Jaye without consequence seems to me to undermine the believability of the two main girls. Given the implied intensity of feeling I am not sure that either of the would be so comfortable with the MC's infidelity. I am assuming thata choice point is coming, Mallory or Jaye, but if it was me writing this I'd want to go back and either prefigure/telegraph their acceptace of polyamory (which given their traumatic backstories would be a hard sell) or build more tension into the relationship between them (ie Mallory and Jaye).
As things stand the writing is excellent, the character are mostly believable but the acceptance of the MC's wandering cock is acting against the believability of the two main girls. Given their characters as presented, I cannot honestly believe they would accept his slutty behaviour without some serious consequences.
I get that the genre demands a certain amout of lewd content but overall it feels like you are reaching for something more interesting than just another faptastic wankfest.
Push the tesion between Jaye and Mallory, push the MC's internal conflict .
RetCon the hell out it all so that it's not just another "I got fuck em all and now I can choose whomever without consequence." easy fantasy.
Despite all the consessions you've made to the genre you are still pushing a hard choice. If it was me writing this I'd have made it a harder choice earlier.
I mean really, if the MC actually loves Jaye, ahy is fucking around with all th others? If he doesnt and just wants her to be another notch on the bedpost then you need to puch his callousness. i don't know. I could twat on for hours, Suffice it to say that this is the only game on hear that has inspired me to think beyond my next nut...
Do what you will, I'll enjoy it however it plays out.
Top 3 game