I don't recall this many issues with translation in Freeloading Family, nor do I recall this much chaos-dominated dialogue.
The majority of the character dialogue revolves around "talking around" a point, topic, idea, or purpose rather than actual making a point, talking about the topic, or actually introducing the idea. It's not like Stephen King writing where he goes into an over-abundance of descriptive text about EVERYTHING the reader's perspective could possibly experience with five senses at that moment in the book's storyline. For example, say the whole point of what I want to talk about is this green bush planted in a lawn, but before I talk about the bush, I want to talk about the earth that the bush is planted in, and the grass that grows in the very same earth the bush is in. And the worms and insects that crawl and live in the earth the bush and the grass is planted in. And the wind that blows through that grass and bush. That right there is a wall of useless text. I repeatedly used the word bush which was the topic point, but you learned NOTHING about the bush beyond it's a bush planted in a lawn - covered in the first sentence. In this game, it's just a lack of editing, or I guess reliable beta testers in this case?
Editors perform the task of keeping Creatives who are too close to the "work" to maintain an objective perspective and stay on track. Just like in movies, the editor also questions and requires the writer to consider and justify scenes and dialogue that do not seem necessary. Is this needed to move the story forward or needed to set up something or explain something?
With this game seemingly large amounts of unnecessary dialogue is possibly just let down by the fact that the translation is often confusing. Absolutely no part of me understood the flashback to Stacy sitting alone in the garden, and she meets and talks at length with "Uncle Jon". I have NO idea what that was supposed to explain or accomplish other than confusion. Compound that with, the entire mystery Stacy is hiding is just a complete throwaway branch for me. Unlikeable character acting like a spoiled, entitled brat, and apparently involved with disreputable people who have leverage on her because she's trapped in some way and using/treating loved ones and best friends who have only ever been good to her and supportive, like tools or pawns on a chess board.
So often I'm clicking through these massive tracts of word salad that just serve no purpose other than "color", I guess? But there are limits to color commentary, and it doesn't serve to move the story forward. Like 90% of the dialogue the "detectives club" characters (Oliver and Johnny) were talking to the MC about in the Library just wasted time, but SO much time was spent there for no purpose. Leaving there, the MC only took with him that they have to do more detecting. PAGES of text to leave with nothing progressing the story. So is Johnny being introduced there a pivotal moment in the story? We already spent plenty of time with Oliver, so it's not him. Was learning that Johnny's oldest sibling is old enough to be his grandfather a major piece of information for the story and/or characters? Does it add depth to the Johnny character, making him more interesting or believable?
How about them being unable to speak about the "networks" that they are using to do this investigation for the MC - they touched on it more than once. Does that do anything for us at that moment in the story? Based on their results, it seemed to me that they just used a search engine and came up empty. So was this just supposed to be humorous?
I'm just often finding myself annoyed that my time is just being wasted so often, but it is an interesting plot with interesting characters. And it isn't always written like it's made of cotton candy. There is substance there.
As always, I will state, I am assuming that at least SOME of my issues are my fault. Maybe I'm the idiot. I could easily be making this worse for myself by clicking quickly through dialogue that I've identified and fluff. Maybe it isn't.
I'm hopeful that Stacy is a "redeemable trash" type of character. Starts off as the one you'd write out of the game because she's just a piece of shit of a human being, irredeemably ignorant, not worth my time. But the story ends up revealing a deep and tragic history and backstory, massively rewarding you for sticking it out and with her where she ends up having the most growth and is the most loyal and "ride or die" LI in the game.
The majority of the character dialogue revolves around "talking around" a point, topic, idea, or purpose rather than actual making a point, talking about the topic, or actually introducing the idea. It's not like Stephen King writing where he goes into an over-abundance of descriptive text about EVERYTHING the reader's perspective could possibly experience with five senses at that moment in the book's storyline. For example, say the whole point of what I want to talk about is this green bush planted in a lawn, but before I talk about the bush, I want to talk about the earth that the bush is planted in, and the grass that grows in the very same earth the bush is in. And the worms and insects that crawl and live in the earth the bush and the grass is planted in. And the wind that blows through that grass and bush. That right there is a wall of useless text. I repeatedly used the word bush which was the topic point, but you learned NOTHING about the bush beyond it's a bush planted in a lawn - covered in the first sentence. In this game, it's just a lack of editing, or I guess reliable beta testers in this case?
Editors perform the task of keeping Creatives who are too close to the "work" to maintain an objective perspective and stay on track. Just like in movies, the editor also questions and requires the writer to consider and justify scenes and dialogue that do not seem necessary. Is this needed to move the story forward or needed to set up something or explain something?
With this game seemingly large amounts of unnecessary dialogue is possibly just let down by the fact that the translation is often confusing. Absolutely no part of me understood the flashback to Stacy sitting alone in the garden, and she meets and talks at length with "Uncle Jon". I have NO idea what that was supposed to explain or accomplish other than confusion. Compound that with, the entire mystery Stacy is hiding is just a complete throwaway branch for me. Unlikeable character acting like a spoiled, entitled brat, and apparently involved with disreputable people who have leverage on her because she's trapped in some way and using/treating loved ones and best friends who have only ever been good to her and supportive, like tools or pawns on a chess board.
So often I'm clicking through these massive tracts of word salad that just serve no purpose other than "color", I guess? But there are limits to color commentary, and it doesn't serve to move the story forward. Like 90% of the dialogue the "detectives club" characters (Oliver and Johnny) were talking to the MC about in the Library just wasted time, but SO much time was spent there for no purpose. Leaving there, the MC only took with him that they have to do more detecting. PAGES of text to leave with nothing progressing the story. So is Johnny being introduced there a pivotal moment in the story? We already spent plenty of time with Oliver, so it's not him. Was learning that Johnny's oldest sibling is old enough to be his grandfather a major piece of information for the story and/or characters? Does it add depth to the Johnny character, making him more interesting or believable?
How about them being unable to speak about the "networks" that they are using to do this investigation for the MC - they touched on it more than once. Does that do anything for us at that moment in the story? Based on their results, it seemed to me that they just used a search engine and came up empty. So was this just supposed to be humorous?
I'm just often finding myself annoyed that my time is just being wasted so often, but it is an interesting plot with interesting characters. And it isn't always written like it's made of cotton candy. There is substance there.
As always, I will state, I am assuming that at least SOME of my issues are my fault. Maybe I'm the idiot. I could easily be making this worse for myself by clicking quickly through dialogue that I've identified and fluff. Maybe it isn't.
I'm hopeful that Stacy is a "redeemable trash" type of character. Starts off as the one you'd write out of the game because she's just a piece of shit of a human being, irredeemably ignorant, not worth my time. But the story ends up revealing a deep and tragic history and backstory, massively rewarding you for sticking it out and with her where she ends up having the most growth and is the most loyal and "ride or die" LI in the game.
