Pretty fun and interesting. Good art. All around:
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My only critique is
this fucking paragraph that Millie's progress and your relationship with her moves waaayyyy too fast, story-wise. She goes from trying to stab you to endlessly thanking you and promising to be useful in a matter of about five lines of dialogue. It's probably asking too much but I really feel like the intro to the game needs to be redone to better reflect how scared and untrusting she is, especially after losing her sister. She should be alert, on edge, and paranoid. You should have to build trust with her before she's even willing to talk to you, let alone come into your apartment. The big "woooahhh it's sooo prettyyyy" moment is fine only after she lets her guard down, which she shouldn't just immediately do with a total stranger. She also takes immediate interest in everything you do, and tries to help you immediately. It feels like she's instantly devoting herself to you instead of trying to find and rescue her sister. She starts cooking for you (or trying to) immediately, tries to help by making money/earning 'rewards' that she brings to you. etc. etc. My point is it all moves too fast, when the charm and drive of these games is that it's a slower pace where you grow closer and closer to this person over time. And with the setting given there's already so much going on and so much to slowly unfold.
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