VN - Ren'Py - Move the Chains [v0.3.5] [MissFortune]

I was kind of hopeful for this one. I went in blind not really knowing what to expect, but left feeling more disappointed than anything else.

Allow me to explain. If I was to grade this game purely on the visuals, it would easily be a 4 out of 5.
- The renders are gorgeous and are fully capable of giving some other titles on here a run for their money.
- The animations, however few there are, are fine. Not the greatest I've ever seen, but by no means the worst.
- The UI looks great. It's not intrusive, and it has a very nice clean look with a unified theme that ties into the game rather well.
- Bugs so far were pretty limited as well. Only one I ran into was common enough that the developer released a patch for it. After applying the patch it was fixed it up without issue.
- The characters look nice enough, although if there is one black mark against them, it's that a lot of the female cast look very samey. I'm not sure if the dev has a thing for fit dark haired women with blue eyes or what, but for a game with a more harem styled romance, I feel like you'd want more unique looking characters to draw the players interest rather than having everyone look like off brand copies of each other.

Now the novel side of things isn't all bad.
- The plot certainly feels a bit more unique when compared to similar titles. It's interesting and has a very clear conflict for the MC to try and navigate in their personal life and football career.
- There's a few typos here and there, and a couple instances of missing or misplaced words, but it wasn't a widespread problem. At the very least it's nothing that can't be fixed by a couple proofreading sessions.
- There is one feature in this game that really stands out, and it's the ability to click on key words to get a better explanation or definition. As someone who has no real knowledge of football, it's a very helpful feature and one that I feel should not be forgotten simply because of how effective and unobtrusive it is.

That's unfortunately where the praise ends though. One of the biggest issues with this game is the writing. Which for a visual novel, is a bit of an important piece.

So what exactly is wrong with the writing? Sadly, there's a lot.
- By far one of the worst things about the writing is how the dialogue tends to drag on for way too long. Now this wouldn't be an issue if it had any substance to it, but as it stands a lot of it feels like filler. The best comparison I could make is when you're forced to write a paper with a word limit, so you give your key point in like a paragraph, and spend the next 450 words just bullshitting and reiterating a couple key points over and over again. Which is something that game does as well because it too has a tendency to repeat the same points ad nauseam.
- The dialogue, similar to the characters, is very samey. There's no distinct character to any of it. Everyone sounds the same. And almost every time you talk to someone, they have this real bad tendency to get real preachy with the MC. A character reminding the MC of their shortcomings or flaws once in a while is fine, but as it stands, it happens way too many times to the point where it just becomes irritating and repetitive.
- The writing for the MC isn't really any better. I get the feeling that the dev wants him to come across as a lovable asshole with a heart of gold, but he doesn't. Instead he comes across as an asshole who makes snarky remarks. Sure he has a few heartfelt moments, but they often feel so out of place that it's actually kind of jarring and takes you out of the moment when it does happen.
- The pacing for this game also feels really weird. At times it feels like it's meant to be more of a slow burn kind of title where you romance characters over time, but you're given the option to fuck several different characters right from the get-go before you've even left for Texas. And the whole transition to Texas itself feels like it comes and goes way too quick. There isn't any build up to the move, it just suddenly happens and then *boom* you're in Texas without a care in the world.
- There is a very clear lack of stakes or conflict. There's the whole story about the MCs past and how they got arrested and sent to jail, but it doesn't really have any bearing on the story. Sure other characters remark on it from time to time, but it doesn't seem to cause any actual hardships at all, outside of an interaction with one character, but then you move to Texas and that character is gone just as soon as they arrived. So the stakes, what little there are, immediately come and go. Everything in the game seems to imply that the character is going to face lots of hardships and judgement, but he never does. In fact everything seems to be going just fine for the MC. He leaves his old drug and gang infested neighborhood and moves into something akin to a mansion, with no problems whatsoever. But that lack of any conflict or stakes just makes the story feel boring. A character that has everything handed to them on a silver platter is anything but interesting.
- Love interests have very little screen time. They're there for a couple minutes, and then you (maybe) get a sex scene, and then you move on. Sometimes it's on to a new love interest, but more often than not, it's onto another 4 paragraph dialogue dump with a sentence of actual meaningful dialogue. Like I said, the pacing of everything feels off. You don't really spend enough time with any of the characters to develop any real meaningful bond or feelings towards them and the dialogue certainly doesn't help matters either.
- We also really need to have a conversation about the black characters in this game. They don't feel like they're written to be actual characters, but rather stereotypes or racial caricatures. It would be like including a bunch of Italians in your game and making them all sound like mobsters straight out of The Godfather. And while I wasn't sure if the dev was doing it intentionally or not at first, when you pair it with the culture war nonsense, it doesn't really paint any of it in a good light at all. It goes from initially coming across as just really bad writing and accidental stereotyping to being openly and blatantly racist.
- Speaking of, the weird culture war shit. Every once in a while, one of the characters will drop some weird culture war talking point out of fucking nowhere. No lead up, no hesitation, just *bam*. Like for instance Kyle Rittenhouse or one character suddenly sliding in a remark about trans-athlete Lia Thomas. I honestly can't tell if the developer is trying to write these people as conservatives, in which case it comes off as just more stereotyping, or if they're trying to score brownie points with the type of folks that label a game "woke" because it has a gay character. Hell at first glance the move from California to Texas seems innocent enough, but then in retrospect it starts to come off as more unnecessary political commentary. It's especially jarring because the second or third love interest you meet is trans and the MC is written in a way that he seems like he's fully accepting of it. But then later on there's the whole trans-athlete remark that he just seems to go along with, which if you've romanced the trans LI, directly goes against everything the game has already established. The character seemingly has no views or opinions outside of that moment, and what few views or opinions they do have can seemingly change at the drop of a hat. Which in the end, leads to none of it feeling genuine and all of it feeling like pandering.

What's weird to me is that this game is clearly inspired by another game on here. And somehow the developer for this game has not only fallen into some of the same problems as the original, but they've managed to introduce new ones along the way resulting in a game that feels more like a pale imitation rather than a story trying to stand on its own.

In my opinion, this is one of those games that could benefit from a rework. The dev has the visuals nailed, so there's no worry there. But they clearly need to go back to the drawing board when it comes to the writing and pacing. If they do that, I think this game could be amazing, but as it stands, right now it's just a bunch of pretty pictures with a barely coherent story attached to it.

This is a wait and see game. Right now, you're looking at a couple throwaway scenes with literal whos and a couple blowies with side characters. There is zero movement on the sister, the mom, the neighbor, the agent......I mean zero movement on anyone there is to care about. Two years and about five hours of playtime and there's essentially nothing but extremely long and extremely disconnected scenes.

Apparently it's taboo to discuss that other sportsball game around here, but this was set up to be that except actually worth your time. The visuals are incredible. The writing is pretty good, only about half a dozen common typos in the whole lot. I mute my AVNs and listen to my own music so I can't comment on the sound. The whole plot is very engaging.

But five hours and not a peep with the LIs is way, way too much time. One of my main issues with the other game is that it has endless dialogue that becomes more about preaching and flapping gums than anything meaningful. Another example is how people shit all over Sunshine Love for being an exposition dump yet that one actually has main LI banging and this one doesn't. I'm sorry, no matter how good the narrative is I didn't sign up for a soap opera, I signed up to see some fuck. There's no fuck here.

Check back in four or five years, around the time a rework gets going (if you know what I mean).

Incredible visuals, likable and varied characters all around, and engaging story. The writing is mostly very good, but there tends to be a lot of preachy monologues and exposition and trauma dumps. There's a large amount of football references, which can be confusing even with the explanations. There's also too many LIs to the point where you have a hard time keeping track of everyone. Would be better if there was a stronger focus on a few central characters to create more emotional depth. Just nitpicking though and I can’t help but give it a perfect rating if only for the amazing renders. Barring a few minor details, an excellent game and one of the best VNs out there.

first and foremost, the randers in this game are top notch. like you will be hard presed to find equal renders with the same render device.
the dev is trying to tell a captivating story with (truth be told) very american story elements that many non american players may find non-appealing.
never the less the story as a whole is compelling and the dev is obviously trying his best to convey his thoughts with the tool they have at their disposal.
the and product is easyly among the top 1% games on this side, and even thought i fundamentally disagree with some of the devs decisions i have to give it 5 stars if i compare it to what else has such a high rating.
this has all the puzzle peaces to be a master peace, just give it a bit more time to cook

One of the better AVNs I've played and I've played a good number of them. I'd put this one up there with Race of Life, Summer's Gone, Chasing Sunsets, etc.

It has a very solid story and that is the focus, not just a sex simulator. The developments with the girls are more of a slow burn style for the most part and I like that a lot. I see some people complaining about there being a lot of dialogue, but I consider that a huge plus. Many AVNs are underdeveloped, with way too little dialogue so I appreciate that the developer is taking it seriously and trying to write a thorough story. Dialogue is essential to that and it also helps develop personalities.

I'm a big fan of bro / sis on the incest side of things and appreciate very much that there is an I-Patch for that as the development with Diana is very well-done so far in the story. It's set up evolve at a proper pace as things move forward in the story. I do hope the developer isn't afraid to write this one into a deep romantic relationship, even so far as leading into the news being involved if they are seen together at events, etc. and considered being "more close than a bro sis usually are", lol. Was also happy to see the 'pregnancy' tag on the main page as well.

On other LIs, Alaina is probably right up there with Diana for me. Dev has done a nice job developing a variety of LIs so the player has a nice list of options to pursue.

Hoping there will be relationship angles involved on these and not just a harem - the thing I don't like about harems is how so many times they are written to just pretend the girls don't care that 'their guy' is running around sleeping with 20 different girls...and it'd be one thing if allthe LIs seemed like loose little 304s, but many of these girls seem like the relationship type that would not want to share their dude.

Only cons in the game are that the animations need some improvement. Dev is doing a good job patching the game and trying to fix bugs as they pop up.

Keep up the good work, dev. I am looking forward to future releases.

I generally like the game but the writing is getting way too cringe. It feels forced and not organic. I have to agree the MC feels way too cocky even when you pick humble. Also, the Ghetto slang feels way over board.

Oh God, what do I say?

There's a tonne I like about this VN, but I have to wade through so much shit to get there it's exhausting.

The first offense is character interactions. Characters do one of two things when meeting you: they tell you a long-ass story that ends up sounding like an Aesop fable, or they tell you something deeply private and illuminating about themselves with very little prompting. It's incredibly frustrating, and there is no planet on which this can be termed as me hating because of taste. It is the very first thing you learn not to do in fiction.

The second offense is aimlessness. There's a great video of Trey Parker and Matt Stone giving a talk at a university where they label the current pathetic state of Hollywood as a problem of "and then..." That being that every scene is one of something happening to the main character(s), with little to no interconnectivity to a whole. They posit that the solution to this is to shift the phrase to "therefore..." and if a scene doesn't end with being able to say "therefore" and it isn't the end of the story, then it probably shouldn't exist. MtC is so painfully guilty of the former that it isn't even funny. Take the latest episode. The MC goes to a photo shoot where nothing happens other than a meaningless conversation with a character who is not a love interest. It's just there, holds no dramatic value, and is a completely pointless exercise. The game is full of this. Nothing happens. Don't get me wrong, some of the scenes are enjoyable, but most of them don't feel like they are driving towards anything at all. It's just aimless.

The third offense is the lack of dramatisation. The author has a lot of opinions and likes to inject them into the game. Just like the weirdo hacks in the mainstream game industry though, it is done in a way that is so surface level, and so monumentally dumb, that I just wish he/or she would shut the fuck up. You have an opinion on something, you put it into your story by creating a scenario where that opinion has stakes and conflict. If you are actually good at storytelling, and not a hack who likes to sniff their own farts, you posit different answers to the conflict through characters who have different outlooks. You don't just inject meaningless dialogue so that you can say (through the voice of your character) what your opinion on, say, vaccinations is. Would this event have been better if MC and D had different stances on vaccination protocols and found themselves in some kind of conflict that had stakes (say that one of the team (or a friend) has a respitory illness that puts them in danger). That's a fucking story, not whatever vomit is being randomly spewed.

Offense number four is how many love interests are in the game. You are constantly ping ponging between them, never getting enough time to breathe - never really having any actual story with them - just a bunch of random conversations. There are too many. This isn't a taste thing it is an objective truth that there are so many, that none of them are properly serviced leading to a level of dissatisfaction that I am not sure can be equalled.

Offense number five is that the main character is a Mary Stu. Given the attitudes expressed by the author, I am extremely surprised that this is the case. This mother fucker is a corner back, from a shitty area, with an awful upbringing and an obsession with sports. Why does he sound like a fucking Shakespeare soliloquy with every fucking conversation he has? Why is a character who can lose the plot and beat another man to death in a rage, so measured and reasonable in talking to others? It doesn't make sense. Did he "get better" in prison? Then we needed to fucking see that. You don't do character growth off screen for fuck's sake. It's what makes a story a story. We need to see it happening. And how can this character grow now when he's got an answer for everything? When he is unassailable and utterly capable?

So what did I like?

It looks great. Really, I like the renders in this just as much as I like those in the most praised Daz work.

Yuna and Fame are great love interests and I wish they and Diana were the only three so there was some fucking focus.

And honestly, I just like sports stories. I like the idea of regular competition and the fear of loss and the hope of victory. Although, to be fair, this was achieved just by choosing the subject matter and isn't really a bit of praise the developer should take.

So in summary; I enjoy some of this AVN, but there are a bunch of really fatal issues that, if not either fixed or greatly reduced, will eventually lead to me dropping it - but for now, a couple of the love interests and my general like of the genre will continue to pull me along, even though I hate quite a bit of it.

True gem here, been a while since i liked an avn that much, the visuals are really good, almost all the characters seems alive and well written, the story feel very honest, well thought and engaging (even if you don't know sh!t about american football like me).

At the begining i almost closed the lgbt content (not really my thing) and i'm glad i didn't, the story of this character is really touching (don't know if it's still there if you desactivate it).

If you liked avn like Summer's gone with dark/moving story, and all that type of sh!t this one is for you, was the case for me, pretty odd it only got 55 reviews when there's that much potential.

This game is weird. The renders are good, the sex scenes are good, the overall story is interesting.

But then every twenty minutes, the characters get on some weird little soapbox and shoot off some comment about how woman can all get rich doing onlyfans, or just date high status men to use them for their money, or how vaccines are dumb because COVID's just a bad flu. Weird little black pilled, incel-coded tangents.

The game's pretty fun. It's just offputting to go from a story mostly about second chances at football and getting blowjobs from random woman to suddenly standing around agreeing with some skinhead boxer that everyone secretly wishes they were being paid to beat people's faces in and you're the only one brave enough to say it. The vibes are off.

This game has potential. The story is well written but the game also has quite a bit of nagging flaws.

The story is quite unique and interesting. It makes me want to continue playing.

The writing is very wordy though.
A lot, and i mean a LOT, of text is just flavor text and introspectives that doesn't bring anything to the story or the game. I have noting against reading but it's not really interestingly written. It makes me lose interest of the game and no, I'm not meaning it makes the sex scenes too far apart, it's just uninteresting, a chore to go through. If they condensed it a bit it would do a lot for the game.

Characters are good and each have distinctive personalities.
What is not distinctive is character models. They are all very beautiful but almost all faces look the same, the bodies looks sameish, hair and clothing styles are similar. Very few of them are different enough to distinguish from the others.
For a person that has problem with remembering names like me it makes it impossible to understand who is who.

Animations seems like an afterthought, they are pretty basic. Sex scenes overall are boring.

I think it's fixable but not good in it's current state.

It's good, standard animations, characters are pretty decent. A good few look alot alike, but its nothing that bad.

I like the darker atmosphere, the lower lighting levels and the story a lot as compared to most things this is more of a story than just a erotic fantasy (atleast so far) and I can give my props for that. Soundtracks pretty good too, falls into theme.

The writing especially just feeling "human" rather than most of the crap you come across where its like "my cute princess snuggle bear, i love u, let me do this, i will do anything for you, I will give you every part of me, yes you're the best, you're so big, you're so hot, you're so cute" blah blah. Even in just normal conversation a lot of writers just have a very.... robotic feel to it. Not this, this feels like a real person with real problems and real things happening. All dialogue is real and believable, theres good slang usage, they talk like people, its incredibly charming to read in that fact alone. I've grown up similarly to the MC so its a breath of fresh air having realistic conversations and even being accurate to real life.

Just kinda lacks content overall but I look forward to future releases.

I also see negativity around the MC being too much of a "powerful" character but I'm gonna be real as shit here, I dont see that as a negative at all. If anything I welcome it alot more, I get tired of playing the simp-y, weak, meh MC. Sometimes I just want to enjoy an OP character and if this MC is OP thats a bonus in my books. When you have a harsh upbringing you tend to age almost twice as fast and it may seem unrealistic, but I think it fits perfectly, themes of abuse, streets, drugs, gangs, etc would certainly make a 20 year old come off as a 40 year old. But I also see a ton of flaws in the MC too over-confidence, arrogance, ego, pride, anger management, etc. Theres a lot to unpack.

There is a lot to like here and it is almost a five-star game (see what I did there?).

To be fair, the kind of life the MC had or has is not something I can relate to at all. I was an athlete and could compete just fine on the high school level, but I was never a stand out or anywhere close to it. Additionally,I grew up in the middle class and never had to deal with the threat of getting shot or getting lost in the foster care system. So it's hard for me to comment too much on the realism but it seems pretty legit. The characters are all well thought out and have some depth and the story is compelling and I am looking forward to seeing where it all goes.

The MC is portrayed as someone who makes mistakes and tries to learn from them, but as is the case with these harem games, the LIs are quick to spread their legs for him. Plus, there are too freaking many of them. I hate this because you have to wait a while to get back to your favorite. In fact, in my first playthru, one of the LIs I really liked I had forgotten about because she was absent for so long. I was like "Oh yeah! Where the hell has she been?"

The other thing I hate is the half a head thing. I wish developers would stop this BS. It drives me nuts. There are photos displayed of the MC with half his head. I mean, come on. Talk about ripping you out of the story. And yes, I know, eventually the developer starts showing the MC's face, but it's too little too late. Hiding the face or doing the half head is just stupid. For the 2 or 3 people who like this, the rest of us normal people hate it so stop doing it.

Also, I hate all the changing the brand name crap. I mean, Moogle? I mean Google is part of our lexicon and places like Target are part of our everyday lives. You are allowed to use them as long as there are not any negative things. Like, you can say "She ate at McDonalds" but you can't say "She got food poisoning after eating at McDonalds." Normally I don't complain about these things, but there are so many alt brands in the AVN it really stands out. Granted, for the NILs or brand sponsors the MC receives, you probably should use alt brands, but when you are just referencing them, it is not illegal.

Anyway, despite my little pet peeves, it really is a great little AVN and the production, writing and story are all good to great. You should definitely download it and give it a try,

Good luck to a talented developer.

VERSION: v.0.3
SUMMARY: Promising but has significant flaws that games with less flair managed to do better.
RATINGS: (out of 5):

1. Models: 5
2. Animations: 4
3. General Visuals: 5
4. Characters: 3
5. Story: 3
6. Writing: 3
7. Pacing: 2
8. Content (amount): 3
9. UI & Sounds: 3
10. Fetish & kinks: 2

Average: 32 of 50 possible points giving a 64% rating i.e. 3-4 stars.

PROS:

1. Very good looking models, too good in a way, but its a game after all so...
2. Animations are very impressive, at least what I have seen so far.
3. Interface is nice, unique design and style is pretty impressive looking. Functions as any other renply VN though.
4. Writing is good, structured well, but (see cons)
5. Sounds are not bad either, but the music is an issue to me. (see cons)

CONS:

1. Music, while the dev did give a notice of music being a placeholder, I can't stress enough to not use music with lyrics in your game! It detracts from the reading when there is "speaking" just use tunes with no words please!
2. I find it a tad annoying that the dialogue has so many abbreviations, I assume often referring to a persons/s and while i'm sure some people speak this way, its to me (someone who speak, what I would consider normal, not like someone who actually says "LOL") its a bit frustrating and breaks the flow of the dialogue for me. The slang is just annoying to be honest but I assume its part of that crowd, that industry and the people that gravitate towards its?
3. Apart from the dialogue, I also noticed the odd spelling/typo, so some proof reading again would be best.
4. The MC is kind of annoying in he always has some retort or "witty comeback", kinda like deadpool but just more asshole with it also. Added to this, he is completely arrogant and while this is maybe what the developer is going for, its off putting to me. (See final thoughts on MC below)
5. Again on dialogue, there is simply too much, too much and I find myself actually skipping the text and speed reading to pick up on anything interesting. Much of the conversations are either NFL sport related and whats worse the slang, the "hood" "ghetto", call it what you will (not meant derogatory) is atrocious.
6. No lewd or sounds during sexual encounters.
7. Not really anything kinky or any fetishes, the game so far drives conversations that MC has about his life more than any of the good stuff (not that it needs to be solely about sex, but this is an adult VN...)
8. Pacing is actually pretty slow and whats to see is also pretty much vanilla in terms of lewd content. Disappointing tbh.
9. Interesting enough story, but looses me quickly due to wasteful dialogue and jargon, backslapping "bro" conversations that don't appeal to me in the slightest.
10. Small gripe over animations being a bit "off" few frames and angles during scenes do make them unnatural and unsexy.

FINAL THOUGHTS & SUGGESTIONS:

• The MC being the main focus is one thing, but the issue I have is that the LI's have little airtime, it does not feel like you see them enough, we are after all (mostly) here for the chicks no? Added to this, the MC does not really seem to cultivate relationships, he defaults to this "if not why not" mentality which makes him come across shallow and this despite a lot of thought provoking conversations he has with LIs and characters in general. It again adds to that of, who and what is the MC? He is all over the place, in more ways than one.
• While semi interesting, American football is not a sport in my country and as such I find the MC and his cohorts or friends talking about it a bit frustrating. I believe the dev did their research and are probably big NFL fans, but I would be careful adding so much of a relatively select sport that is more an American sport than anything into a game to the extent they have, after all your market here is international.
• Someone else also commented on the amount of fluff and "pointless" conversations happening that could be cut a bit more short, this is rather true and painfully apparent, as there are many such lines of "thoughts" I do find it a little bloated, while this comment is simply my opinion, I do appreciate the amount of "story" going into this VN. That being said, trying to make characters more complex than they are or even should be is something to watch out for. The MC is a bit of a contradiction in his brutish, arrogant behaviour, apparent no skills other than football, yet seems to a be a fountain of insight, wisdom and can be rather philosophical, which I am not saying can't happen Im just saying that its IMO unlikely to all happen with one person like that.
• The story is seemingly interesting, or at least interesting enough, the issue to me is the flow, telling, the build up. I feel too much time is spent rattling on about sponsors and all the perks the MC gets and he hasn't even started playing. While this may be the way things go in this industry, from a story telling POV I would opt to break it up, introduce the new gym or whatever as and when its needed or later, it does not ALL need to happen as the MC arrives, because reading it is a DRAG.
• As per above, the MC feels like a mixed bad, for one, he is oblivious to obvious interest from certain woman, how is that possible when he clearly is so wise, mature, filled with all these deep profound philosophical thoughts and is clearly a complex individual that like to beat people up if he is not shit talking them. Almost like the scene where a gun get put under his chin and the LI standing next to him, calm as cucumber asks him to support just after the altercation...I mean I get he doesn't give a shit, but she, with her kid like in stone throw distance away? WTF man? So much bullshit, trying to make a dumb, complex, sensitive only not character...I get he is still figuring shit out but some things are just too blatantly obvious to ignore or be so oblivious to it.
• Adding to above comments and to reaffirm what I mentioned, basically, love interest relationships do not feel really very well designed, I feel we see more the MC and relationships are not cultivated well. Just when you think the MC will progress with a LI it takes a step back and ends up being unresolved, which simply drives my annoyance levels to the red.
• Clearly a good amount of work and effort went into this game, I can appreciate that and applaud the developer for it and highly recommend supporting said developer, but mostly for the visuals of the game rather than the story or how its told. That being said, the items I have listed above are my personal feelings, some of these wont be issues to many people here though.

I really want to like this game. The premise is interesting and really delves into how messed up the world of College Sports is that money has just become the be all end all of things. The renders and animations are really fantastic and a few characters that would normally not find attractive due to certain qualities (not into gauged ears, but I really find Yuna appealing).

It's just rather unfortunate that there is so much not to like about this game that my opinion turns negative:

1. So much of this game feels massively overwritten, and conversations and monologues feel like they take twice as long to establish their point than they need to.
   
   
2. It doesn't help that what is being talked about isn't always the things that need to be talked about, such as setting the stage and background behind characters and their interactions prior to the start of the story. Many of the early characters in the story have an established history with the MC, yet we're over 2 updates in and the game feels like it is focusing on new characters like Kara and her son rather than give us many reasons to care about the existing ones; Diana especially is neglected and is just rather annoying cause I, as the player, have no reason to care about her.
   
   
3. Most of the women in MC's orbit seem instantly drawn to him, either for undisclosed reasons pertaining to their prior history, or for simply no reason whatsoever. Kara especially is an example of this. She's known the MC for 2 days and basically treats him like her son's new stepfather and wants to jump the MC's bones, barely holding herself back. But that also forces us onto the biggest issue with this game...
   
   
4. The main character is completely insufferable because he might as well be white ghetto Jesus. He's the best football player in the country, but he's also a super tough gangster because of his harsh upbringing that even did hard time, yet he's also very worldly and wise beyond his years, basically to the point of being philosophical, in just about every conversation he has with anyone. Characters need flaws and weaknesses to make them interesting and while he does have his anger management issues as a minor flaw, that alone isn't compelling enough to make Jesus here an interesting character. Especially not when essentially all the consequences of his actions, him going to prison and possibly losing his chance to play football again, are being completely washed away by the course of the story so he can live a wonderful life full of money and women, doing exactly what he wants to do.

So yeah, aside from an interesting baseline premise and some solid visuals (which doesn't count for as much of late as lots of games are starting to look better and better, IMO), this one isn't terribly enjoyable. If you're that desperate for a sports AVN, there are better ones out there.

Excellent game.

I have seen people complaining about there being too much dialog but i really appreciate a story that is well written and even though there is a lot of dialog, it really expresses to the characters personality, the story, the world building, relationships etc.
Many dev's fall short on this aspect when writing as it seems unnecessary to try and extend the story but i very much enjoy reading through this.

Overall the characters are interesting and diverse, the story is engaging and not rushed/drawn out, renders and animation are some the best i have seen in games on this site.

Good luck with the rest of the story dev!

Overall: Okay/Promising

Renders are great!! Beautiful even. That said, I am a little thrown off by the fact that the player is just inserted into this world without much knowledge of the other characters that are introduced almost consecutively. It's like all of these new characters show up for the first time (restaurant, bar, in the street) and all know or head over heels for the MC. Almost each one of them has similar looks and personalities (tough love or edgy personalities). Despite that, the premise is there......an unfortunate football star looking for redemption for himself and his family. Pretty interesting to attract an audience's interest based on first impression. However, it fails on developing that connection from player to MC. Most devs fail to realize that this can make or break how invested players are into the story and its characters. For example, Laura and Diana each has a supposedly sad backstory, but because it was rushed there is no empathy from a player perspective for these characters who are important figures of the MC's life. I just wished it was more developed that's all.

Absolutely excellent game - large cast of characters, lots of dialogue, solid renders, many LIs, lots of choices, and love the college football angle.

Seems to be a bit of a slow burn, at least with some of the LIs - I enjoy that slower build up so this was a big pro.

Animations could use improvement.

Looking forward to more of this game. I even bought the Early Access on Steam to support dev as I liked the game so much.

V0.2

I came in with a bias when I started playing this game. It sat in my "to play someday" list for a few months as I have been burned by low quality sports VNs before where there is not much story involved and I like some meat on the bone.

I am happy to have been wrong on this one.

Graphics 5/5

The developer is using modern genesis models to great effect. They light their scenes well and angles make the scenes seem natural and don't detract from what they are trying to give you. In the VN world, modern assets are expensive but this developer invested a lot of money to make sure the world didn't seem like a repetitive block of the same room, and each area is it's own environment which I really appreciate. Some areas are only used for one scene but they put in the funds to give it it's own which is really rare. With what their patreon numbers say they are bringing in right now, they have not made back the return on investment and I hope that changes as labors of love rarely pay the bills.

Story 4.5/5

Was pleasantly surprised with the direction the developer took. The story revolves around college football but the writing doesn't force it. Instead, they are weaving a tale that leads up to when the MC will take the field. There's a couple of sport scenes but the first two episodes are dedicated to flushing out the MC, showing us his roots, and looking at the business side of modern college football. I look forward to those intense action scenes on the field when they come but they are being built up to instead of given right away. It is a great tease to what happens next and has me hooked.

The reason I can't give story a 5/5 is the way the story is leaning into crime heavily. Yes. Tragic backstory. Got that. A bit of a thick brush though. Could have been less intense for a teen athlete. Might not be as necessary for the story going forward. Sports rivalries would make more sense with other schools or athletes the Mc is trying to take the roster spot from. Thug gangster life with multiple gun scenes feels like a direction for another VN so I'm hoping this falls behind the sports backdrop when it gets into high gear.

LI 4/5

You have a lot of tropes in this one (which game doesn't) but the developer tried to give each of them their own identity. I think they did well separating the different characters. Visually, some are a bit similar looking but I give developers a pass on this because as I said before, assets are expensive and you shouldn't rate a game on graphics twice. They did make an effort to differentiate with tattoos, piercings and character arcs. A couple overlapped a bit to me though. There are three different "dom" girls that pop up with a "sub" girl attached and they felt pretty much like the same "dom" character, but their "subs" are all distinctly different, which is interesting. Also, so many girls in the game that giving full stories for all of them is a challenge, but so far, all the mains have gotten some spotlight to add depth and a few other characters have been teased. For example, I want to see what happens with Parker even though she might have had a total of two or three lines in the first two episodes. If you are looking a t longer release schedules though, I expect I will be challenged to remember who some of the minor role girls are when returning for future episodes.

My favorite main is the MILF next door. Instead of her jumping the MC, you actually meet her kid and the story doesn't just focus on her wanting to get stuffed, but that her child comes first and she is a good mother doing her best. I really like her and love that she feels real.

Polish 4.5/5

I found the game very immersive and the developer did a great job. It is such a minor thing but I have to highlight the one small negative. The game could do with a proof read before it is released. Sometimes you find a sentence that has some grammatical mistakes or a missing word. I get that as a solo developer it is tough because you can end up reading what you think is there after the tenth pass so a second set of eyes might help catch a couple of these. I never got lost on what is going on but it happened enough that I noticed.

Release Content 5/5

Holy crap there was a lot of content in this game! I was expecting an hour or two of play but it just kept going and I lost track of time. I think about 4 hours in is when I looked up at my clock and was taken back by how long I had been playing/reading. The two episodes I played are longer than a lot of other game releases and not sure how they got that much done so fast. From game release to episode 2 was roughly 8 months. episode 3 is coming out this month which would be another 8ish months so if it has similar content volume, I don't know how they do it solo.

I am putting this game in my top tier list. Really looking forward to seeing what episode 3 brings. I admit I am primarily a leech with games on F95. I have sadly only supported one project so far, but depending on the next release, I could see myself giving a lower tier subscription, because so far I think this deserves support.

My first impressions after playing this game, it literally blew my mind due the facts that,

The renders are top notch

The girls look unique and their body proportions are much realistic that many games are missing nowdays

MC is a tall guy, looks handsome and not one of the guys who wont retaliate if you try to cross him(again one of the character traits that most college theme avns lack)

Also choices matter here, if you dont like a particular girl, you can reject her without worrying abt her dropping over you again and again

And lastly it got a freaking HAREM lol, not worry of leaving someone behind if you like them all

Whats not to like abt this game

Definitely a 5/5 from me, well deserved and kudos to the dev for creating such a gem

Move the chains v0.2

Enjoyed this one nice visuals hot and pretty girls hot and dating Mc with fame who can build his own harem. Also sports themed too. There are plenty of girls to caught. My fav is Kara she's hot and a milf. Loved the bonding of Mc with her son. Hoping to see more of her in episode 3. There's fair amount of content here.

+ Hot Mc ( glad dev decided to his full face in episode 2 )
+ Visuals
+ Pretty and hot girls
+ Milfs
+ Harem
+ Sports themed

- to be honest that yellow and blue texts in the start are such a pain to read. ( Hope dev avoids this in next updates)

Overall i enjoyed this one. Keep up the good work dev looking forward to next updates.