Ren'Py - Abandoned - My New Daughter's Lover [Ch 2 v0.11 EA] [DerketoGames]

Awful awful writing. it's painful to read and never even slightly natural. Progress with the daughter is also unnatural and cringy.

Decent daughter model but the mother is fat and as usual the other models are gross, seemingly in order to make the daughter look better. The typical shaved head and masculine blue haired models nobody would want to be involved with in reality

MC looks like a stereotypical sex offender, supposed to be macho but not even slightly convincing

Half of UI is not translated.

Crap, no wonder stuff like this gets abandoned. You avoid certain choices, you see the dev comenting on your choices, that dont matter anyway. If you dont like the dark cow, you get her anyway, if youd ont like The Feminist Jedi, im gessing you get her also, cause why not?

English sucks, characters have 0 light and look like corpses most of the time, SO a very shitty VN, with some annoying choices that impact nothing on the story

Yeah, another trap game where you don't tag correctly and get players by not telling them about Lez-NTR. Damn if a bitch fucks another behind the MC's back whether it's a man or a woman, it's NTR. My playing stopped right at that picture when they started licking the carpet behind the MC's back.

I don't mind if the texts are fucked up and the characters names are mixed up, but if you bring in that kind of shit content that isn't explained, that's where the game stops and the end result is this. If there was a side character licking the carpet, so what, but she's LI and goes behind the MC's back, that kind of shit will never pass the sieve. And I never wish well to the creators of NTR games.

Version Reviewed: Ch 1 v.07

Overview: You proceed house of friend of daughter

Story: You are a former boxer who got convicted of crimes possibly from your former wife who then left you. You sort of adopt a girl who I guess bailed you out of prison but with no money you have to move in with a lonely MILF. It immediately turns into a story about how every girl he meets immediately falls in love and wants to bang him. Also, your luggage is stolen so you have to go clothes shopping with your not-daughter.

So the elephant in the room is the translation. It's horrible. I struggled many times in trying to figure out what it was trying to say. It's not even MTL bad, it's just incomprehensible. Compounding this is the banality of the dialog. There is absolutely nothing in here that you have not seen in a hundred other VNs on this very site. The MC is definitely in the niceguy camp, so if you're into evil MC's this isn't the game for you. The game has choices but I'm not sure they matter, in fact I suspect they do not. They are all of the "look at her but/or not" and apparently they won't carry over to the next chapter.

Graphics wise the models are alright, but far from cutting edge. The backgrounds are plain as can be. There are a number of night scenes that were apparently rendered on moonless nights. You can barely see anything. There are animations, including a lengthy one at the very end of the chapter, but each scene has only 6-8 frames (I counted) and are incredibly mechanical. You can practically hear the gears whirring. Engage thrust action, 4 frame forward, 4 frames back, repeat 3 times. The first chapter is a whole lot of kissing and a bit of groping, with the only real action happening at the very end. I suspect further chapters will include a lot more action as it was already getting quite hot with all of the love interests.

Conclusion: The atrocious translation and medicore graphics drag the score down on this one. While it has no grind and doesn't absolutely crush you with boring dialog there isn't much going for it either. A perfectly mediocre game. This is only the first chapter, maybe the second will improve.

I think this is promising, and say that from the viewpoint of being still in Ch1 presently.

The thing thats killing me is the translation - my brain literally keeps wanting to crawl out my ear at some of what I'm reading - and I dont mean what some of the precious reviewers before have said about grammar, I mean straight illiterate translations. And the continuous mixing up of pronouns, even the LGBQT community would feel sick!

Get a proper translator please, it will clean up your game 1000%

Overall this VN is below average quality. The renders are subpar, with a decent amount of them grainy. A significant portion of the renders are at night, and the lighting at night makes most things impossible to see. The story is lack luster and the English is horrible.

The Engrish is strong with this one. Bad translating can be understandable, but missing dots and other exlamation marks at the end of sentences, that's just laziness.
It makes me skip the dialogues.
Average renders. Loli tag feels like clickbait.

Straight to the point, not beating around the bush. I appreciate that a lot. Decent renders and writing. Dont have to be good at certain things to make the game great. The dev really knows what they are doing.
Looking forward to more of this game

BAD everything. Bad writing, bad premise, bad renders, bad english, Bad loli, feels like it's developed for the sake of milking a few bucks and the dev has no talent so leans it towards more extreme kinks(look at the girl). just BAD. I wish I could give it zero.

This is an average VN. It needs lots of work, but it is only in the beginning of the story. That is why I gave it a 3 star rating.

PROS
Models are lovely

CONS
Lighting is awful
Writing needs lots of help

Overall
This VN isn't bad, but it really needs some things taken care of.
The lighting is in need of some serious help. Yes, I understand that being outside at night means that it will be dark but the dev could add some light out there some how. If there is going to be a scene taking place outside, add some kind of light. That way we don't have to go through the unbearable series of guessing what's actually happening. Most pools have some for of lighting.
Now I understand that this VN is done in 2 different languages, but the English writing is bad. It's like the translation was put through the wash, and just some random words were thrown together to make sentences.
What's with everyone calling the MC moth? That makes no sense.
What's with the dev putting in little random quips? (the red writing)
Is it meant for warnings, or just tossed in there for space filler?

I'm going to have to give this VN a hard pass for future updates. It seems like a decent enough plot, but I just can't get around the bad writing.
I wish the dev(s) all the best with this project.

The renders are of smaller dimensions than it's standard these days, and the visual quality isn't always top notch. In particular, some night-time renders could be brighter.

But all the female models are beautiful, so in general it deserves 5 stars.

The English text seems to be mostly machine-translated, but understandable. The story in general is interesting enough and rather well written, even if not very original. I hope that I'm not wrong feeling that it's gonna be a harem.

Keep up the good work, Derketo, and please stay focused on producing this game! It's much more interesting than some cam girl story or whatever your second project's gonna be.

[v0.5]

Version played My New Daughter's Lover V0.1
I played this version a while back and coming back to the page I figured I'd review it.

The game itself is really simple. You meet a woman and her daughter. Suddenly after living together for a while, the mother of the young loli girl disappears and if I remember correctly, steals a lot of the MC's money/house. With almost nothing to do MC is forced to leave the daughter and do his own thing. He's at a low point when the daughter finds him and offers him help through money she had saved up.

They decide to move in together at a home after talking to a very nice waitress at a coffee shop. Because the loli girl and MC were both abandoned by the mother, they are able to bond and share a good relationship.

Pretty short, but not unenjoyable. If you decide to play it, things happen pretty fast, but nothing too sexual happens other than the MC and the daughter sharing a bed. There is a blossoming kind of love budding between them in the last scene. What's another interesting thing is that since they are living at the waitresses place, they are trying to hide the fact that they aren't father and daughter (If I recall).

I enjoyed my time, don't play if you want action right away, the pacing isn't very fast, but it's possible that if this game gets an other update that there could be some interesting situations between the loli not-daughter

4 Stars