In the second passage
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Then With Zoey:
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Grammar and misspellings in the Hunt Hub:
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But the Fight error does seem to have been in 1.1 (Your download links are misleading)
So does this:
That's not a back to previous passage link, that's a history link and if the stats ever has any interaction, it will undo it, it definitely is not the preferred way.
You spend a whole passage talking about how shitty your job was, and then MC wakes up with a message that just says, "Haha, you're fucked - Love S"
Was this someone out to fuck my life over? Was this just a random chick I picked up in the Bar? It could be the First FUCKING scene. Should MC be curious about "S"? Pissed at "S"? We've got no Backstory.
I'm not your proofreader my friend. Your game isn't interesting enough (yet) for me to click through every passage and point out every mistake.
I love me a good power fantasy, and I think you have some unique ideas and are headed down the right path, missing the proper proof-reading and having lazy coding mistakes really detracts from the story you are telling.