It's true that it's natural for a game developer or people who draw to get stuck. My situation is not very different and I'd like to open a discussion about it and I'd like to ask for your advice. I'd be glad if you could spare some time for this little bit long text.
If I talk about my situation:
I'm the kind of person who hangs out on forums but is the ghost. In other words, I don't post much, I don't comment on posts, and this doesn't help me much. For example, I have been in this forum for years and I follow it, but I have not posted even once. But I wanted to open a post on this heavy subject and I hope I'm posting it in the right place.
Let me get into the subject without wasting time:
I started making erotic games 1 year ago, I wanted it to be something that I could develop in addition to my main job - my main job is making animation for different genres, tv shows, etc. As a result, I devoted my free time to learning how to do it. I was mostly looking at Japanese erotic games as an example, since that's where my main job is focused too, and of course because I can draw anime characters easier.
After browsing a lot of Japanese websites with translate and looking at games here and on steam, I chose the RPG maker series to enter the genre. I don't like coding, I want to make a project that is not coding heavy in general, even if I learn a little javascript along the way. I don't really want to make Visual Novels, although I've looked at Renpy and Visual Novel Studio.
As a result, I'm able to draw, animate, able to use game engine, and enough scripting to help me a little bit. All I had to do was to find something "simple" and put it all the knowledge and materials into a proper work.
When I realized that the problem had started:
And I started, I learned the game engine, I found the concepts, I made the drawings, I implemented the mechanics...
There was a moment of sort of a snap in my brain, “would this be something I would want to play? Would it be something that people would play, it looks too similar to this or that game, is that a problem? Is it too big, will I be able to handle it?” and I had to pull myself back for a while.
After a few trials and setbacks, I realized that I was starting to get into a loop. I keep starting one project, deciding “it's not worth it” and then moving on to another project.
The problem has been going on for a few months now:
Although I've spent a few years in the professional field, I know the work ethic and I'm good with deadlines, I'm having a hard time making a game with a ‘simple’ logic and I keep pulling myself back and re-entering. I know that if I don't want to do it, I won't do it, so a suggestion like ‘Do what you really feel like doing’ doesn't make much sense to me.
Since I don't know the marketing of this field and I can't talk to many experienced people, I felt that I was tired of discovering it on my own and I was really stubborn to make a game. Unfortunately, I also wonder what people will think about the game and I find the logic of ‘do it for yourself’ strange. Because after all, if I did it only for myself, I would do different things, not ero games. This kind of games all about the audience you know. I'm not going to make a game for a month and then jerk off eventually
It makes me more happy if the player is happy. I compare it to animation, yes, it's still enjoyable think while doing it, but in the end it's laborious work and my satisfaction increases when I finish it and present it to someone for their comments, feedbacks or just compliments. At least for my opinion.
Conclusion
I'm stuck, I'm obsessed with what I want to do and I'm actually getting better in terms of mindset. But perfectionism kicks in before I can get myself out of the professional perspective and into ‘let's have fun’ mode. Sometimes I drown in too many ideas, and as a result, I can't get some doubts out of my mind:
Thank you if you have come this far and I hope I could explain the situation.
I would like to know your thoughts, for example, would you be okay with the above classic rpgmaker game as long as it is well designed or do you prefer games from a different point of view. Or are there any advices you can give me that you would like to add? I wrote this to get things out of my chest a bit too. So even if you don't have any advice or anything, feel free to join the discussion.
If I talk about my situation:
I'm the kind of person who hangs out on forums but is the ghost. In other words, I don't post much, I don't comment on posts, and this doesn't help me much. For example, I have been in this forum for years and I follow it, but I have not posted even once. But I wanted to open a post on this heavy subject and I hope I'm posting it in the right place.
Let me get into the subject without wasting time:
I started making erotic games 1 year ago, I wanted it to be something that I could develop in addition to my main job - my main job is making animation for different genres, tv shows, etc. As a result, I devoted my free time to learning how to do it. I was mostly looking at Japanese erotic games as an example, since that's where my main job is focused too, and of course because I can draw anime characters easier.
After browsing a lot of Japanese websites with translate and looking at games here and on steam, I chose the RPG maker series to enter the genre. I don't like coding, I want to make a project that is not coding heavy in general, even if I learn a little javascript along the way. I don't really want to make Visual Novels, although I've looked at Renpy and Visual Novel Studio.
As a result, I'm able to draw, animate, able to use game engine, and enough scripting to help me a little bit. All I had to do was to find something "simple" and put it all the knowledge and materials into a proper work.
When I realized that the problem had started:
And I started, I learned the game engine, I found the concepts, I made the drawings, I implemented the mechanics...
There was a moment of sort of a snap in my brain, “would this be something I would want to play? Would it be something that people would play, it looks too similar to this or that game, is that a problem? Is it too big, will I be able to handle it?” and I had to pull myself back for a while.
After a few trials and setbacks, I realized that I was starting to get into a loop. I keep starting one project, deciding “it's not worth it” and then moving on to another project.
The problem has been going on for a few months now:
Although I've spent a few years in the professional field, I know the work ethic and I'm good with deadlines, I'm having a hard time making a game with a ‘simple’ logic and I keep pulling myself back and re-entering. I know that if I don't want to do it, I won't do it, so a suggestion like ‘Do what you really feel like doing’ doesn't make much sense to me.
Since I don't know the marketing of this field and I can't talk to many experienced people, I felt that I was tired of discovering it on my own and I was really stubborn to make a game. Unfortunately, I also wonder what people will think about the game and I find the logic of ‘do it for yourself’ strange. Because after all, if I did it only for myself, I would do different things, not ero games. This kind of games all about the audience you know. I'm not going to make a game for a month and then jerk off eventually
It makes me more happy if the player is happy
. I compare it to animation, yes, it's still enjoyable think while doing it, but in the end it's laborious work and my satisfaction increases when I finish it and present it to someone for their comments, feedbacks or just compliments. At least for my opinion.Conclusion
I'm stuck, I'm obsessed with what I want to do and I'm actually getting better in terms of mindset. But perfectionism kicks in before I can get myself out of the professional perspective and into ‘let's have fun’ mode. Sometimes I drown in too many ideas, and as a result, I can't get some doubts out of my mind:
- This shit I was doing for ‘distraction’ turned into a real job. I need to learn to have fun again.
- I'm aware of "If you are a beginner of something and trying to make a work on your own, it makes more sense to go in a sort of hierarchical order from small to great." aspect.
- Finishing something is the most important thing, but for example, will a classic rpgmaker game (like a typical and short ero jrpg with dumb girl and slime battle eroticism) be interesting? In the end, it's up to me to make it stand out from other similar games, but consider it's always a some risky situations about every theme in workflow for example.
- Is it worth my time? For example, the above project would please me as long as I finish it, but even for a 4 CG game, it's a lot of work for a one-man game developer. The obsession with time here probably comes from an insecurity about how people's judgement will be.
- And even though I don't plan to make money from it, how can I present this work to the public? Which platform, how? This is a subject that I am the most unaware of and I try not to think about it too much. If I think about it, it pulls me back directly, but it comes to my mind every time after all.
Thank you if you have come this far and I hope I could explain the situation.
I would like to know your thoughts, for example, would you be okay with the above classic rpgmaker game as long as it is well designed or do you prefer games from a different point of view. Or are there any advices you can give me that you would like to add? I wrote this to get things out of my chest a bit too. So even if you don't have any advice or anything, feel free to join the discussion.
Little Note: I'm never looking for originality, don't get me wrong, but I'm still trying to measure how valuable the work I'm going to create. Again, I'm already doing this job with passion and I'm still gonna do it. Likewise, a logic like ‘make a game for your own fetish’ is not a very useful advice for me. And although my writing is a bit pessimistic and realistic, I assure you that I am not depressed or anything, I am very motivated to work.
Help, this is ridiculous. Knowing so much and not being able to make a fuckin jrpg game is stupid.
Overthinking is a bad thing to do, I don't recommend.
Overthinking is a bad thing to do, I don't recommend.
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