VN Ren'Py Superhuman [Development Thread](Demo Available)

[WeirdWorld]

Demo
PC

You must be registered to see the links

You must be registered to see the links

You must be registered to see the links

Mac

You must be registered to see the links

You must be registered to see the links

You must be registered to see the links

Hey guys, names WeirdWorld, a pleasure to meetcha. I'm an animator and now first time game developer making a 2DCG visual novel with renpy. Took a little while but I've finally put together a demo of my game. I'd appreciate any feedback you can give, this is the first visual novel that I've made.

You must be registered to see the links

You must be registered to see the links

You must be registered to see the links

You must be registered to see the links

Overview

After a crazy run in with two supernatural monsters, you, an 18 year old boy, have ended up a superhuman freak with the ability to shapeshift!!! You must come to terms with your new powers and use them for good or for evil.
Don't get too comfortable though, the monsters that you thought were a once in a lifetime occurrence are showing up all over the world, even on the news. It's only a matter of time until someone else gets their own set of superhuman powers! Keep your identity safe and don't neglect strengthening your powers!

Planned Tags

Spoiler

You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.

Gameplay

Spoiler

You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.

Characters

Spoiler

You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.

Spoiler

You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.

Spoiler

You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.

Questions I have for you:

Spoiler

You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.

 

[DragonkingKyo]

looks good is it possible to have a harem of the girls(including any monster girls) and slowly corrupting the girls that have guy into liking you and hating the ones they are with(netori) not just pretending to be the guy they are with?

Also for your questions I like sandboxyness(like Summertime Saga ) in games not being stuck in a specific linear path and yes to visually showing the protagonist

 

[WeirdWorld]

looks good is it possible to have a harem of the girls(including any monster girls) and slowly corrupting the girls that have guy into liking you and hating the ones they are with(netori) not just pretending to be the guy they are with?

Also for your questions I like sandboxyness(like Summertime Saga ) in games not being stuck in a specific linear path and yes to visually showing the protagonist

Harem? Yeah, that's probably going to be an option, monster girl won't be a part of it though, she's not really a "she" more of an "it" that has just transformed to look like a woman for that specific event(turning you into a monster). As for netori, it's probably going to be something like that for the cheerleader chick, and maybe one other.

Thanks for the feedback!

 

[WeirdWorld]

Just tossing out an update. I'm about halfway through the intro of the game. At this rate I'll prob have something release sometime in Jan

Here's a few more characters:

Spoiler: Characters

You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.

​

 

[probably_dave]

Hi WeirdWorld and good luck with your game.

I like the art style, it has a very unique look and feel to it, which should hopefully, make your VN stand out.

On a few of your questions, however, most of these are just my opinion. I'm sure others will have their own:

2DCG vs 3DCG:
For me, like yourself, there is no preference. However, there are less 2DCG games out there. I believe the main reason for this is it's harder to create 2DCG art than 3DCG rather than peoples preference. This means, for your game, it will have an easier change of standing out compared to a 3DCG game. That being said, people so tend to be more fussy when it comes to 2DCG art. As your art has it's own style, there will inevitably be people who hate it and people who love it. So long as you're happy with it, that's what counts.

2DCG and Gameplay:
I've never really noticed that before, however, now that you mention it, it does seem to be true. Honestly, I don't think it's because of there's little demand for 2DCG VNs. It's more likely because VNs are easier to create than Games.
That means, someone with little programming skill, little artwork skill and little story-telling skill can put something together (that's why there's many 3DCG VNs out there, not all being good).
As a 2DCG game requires a higher level of artistic skill from the outset, it sort of follows suit that they will be more ambitious and go for a more gameplay type route. Also, having gameplay elements allows you to get away with having less of a story. A good VN requires a good plot thread and multiple branches running through it to be appealing, while a gameplay game, the plots tend to be weaker, with the choice for the player being done through the gameplay elements.
That all being said, there's definitely a market out there for good 2DCG VNs, in particular western styled ones. However, because there are fewer available, the expectations of the player will be increased and if it doesn't meet their expectations, they are more likely to be disappointed.


Showing the Protagonist:
Again, this is personal opinion, but my preference would be to show the protagonist. I also think for your VN, you sort of have to because the protagonist goes through a physical change during the game (based on your pictures above). Doing this without showing the protagonist will be very difficult.

General Advice:
I small bit of criticism (again, it's only opinion) is that the characters do seem very stereotypical. Prom Queen, Rich Bitch, Loner Goth, Childhood Friend. That means, at the start they will be easier to be relatable, however, they could easily become forgettable. For me, the only one that stands out as unique is Ella as there's something mysterious about her while Alice has something to work with because of the family, while he others are just there.
This is absolutely fine if they are side characters, with little impact to the plot but any characters that become central to the main plot, relying too much on stereotypes can easily make the player lose interest. What's the unique hook that each character has that will bring the player back for more? Again, I think you have this with Ella and Alice, but don't see it with the others. Of course, I'm only going by the description, in the game itself, you might already have these hooks in place.

Anyway, good luck with the project, it does look very promising

 

[WeirdWorld]

Hi WeirdWorld and good luck with your game.

I like the art style, it has a very unique look and feel to it, which should hopefully, make your VN stand out.

On a few of your questions, however, most of these are just my opinion. I'm sure others will have their own:

2DCG vs 3DCG:
For me, like yourself, there is no preference. However, there are less 2DCG games out there. I believe the main reason for this is it's harder to create 2DCG art than 3DCG rather than peoples preference. This means, for your game, it will have an easier change of standing out compared to a 3DCG game. That being said, people so tend to be more fussy when it comes to 2DCG art. As your art has it's own style, there will inevitably be people who hate it and people who love it. So long as you're happy with it, that's what counts.

2DCG and Gameplay:
I've never really noticed that before, however, now that you mention it, it does seem to be true. Honestly, I don't think it's because of there's little demand for 2DCG VNs. It's more likely because VNs are easier to create than Games.
That means, someone with little programming skill, little artwork skill and little story-telling skill can put something together (that's why there's many 3DCG VNs out there, not all being good).
As a 2DCG game requires a higher level of artistic skill from the outset, it sort of follows suit that they will be more ambitious and go for a more gameplay type route. Also, having gameplay elements allows you to get away with having less of a story. A good VN requires a good plot thread and multiple branches running through it to be appealing, while a gameplay game, the plots tend to be weaker, with the choice for the player being done through the gameplay elements.
That all being said, there's definitely a market out there for good 2DCG VNs, in particular western styled ones. However, because there are fewer available, the expectations of the player will be increased and if it doesn't meet their expectations, they are more likely to be disappointed.


Showing the Protagonist:
Again, this is personal opinion, but my preference would be to show the protagonist. I also think for your VN, you sort of have to because the protagonist goes through a physical change during the game (based on your pictures above). Doing this without showing the protagonist will be very difficult.

General Advice:
I small bit of criticism (again, it's only opinion) is that the characters do seem very stereotypical. Prom Queen, Rich Bitch, Loner Goth, Childhood Friend. That means, at the start they will be easier to be relatable, however, they could easily become forgettable. For me, the only one that stands out as unique is Ella as there's something mysterious about her while Alice has something to work with because of the family, while he others are just there.
This is absolutely fine if they are side characters, with little impact to the plot but any characters that become central to the main plot, relying too much on stereotypes can easily make the player lose interest. What's the unique hook that each character has that will bring the player back for more? Again, I think you have this with Ella and Alice, but don't see it with the others. Of course, I'm only going by the description, in the game itself, you might already have these hooks in place.

Anyway, good luck with the project, it does look very promising

Thanks for answering and for the feedback, some really interesting stuff here.

As for your general advice, yeah, the characters do have a few more plot related hooks(at least Liz, Emily and Tiffany do) that I haven't mentioned, but as you pointed out Alice and Ella right now have the most expanded stories, surprised you managed to catch that just going of their description. Looking back at it now the descriptions for the rest are pretty basic, it's because their "hooks" are a little harder to generalize and I wanted to keep the descriptions short and relatively spoiler free. I'll have a go at updating the descriptions to give a better idea of their plot.
This advice was really useful, exactly the kind of thing i was hoping to get when I made this thread, so many thanks.

 

[probably_dave]

That's good to hear.
In regards to your poll around whether to include mini-games, I voted No, because I feel mini-games for the sake of mini-games is not worthwhile. There's nothing wrong with just creating a good story.
However, if the mini-game has some relevance to the story, I'm not against it.
For example, if you're in a forest, you're usually given the choice left, forward or right. Converting this choice into a mini-game I would not be opposed to (for example, being in a maze with 3 different exits and only having a certain amount of moves to get out). However,
Also, mini-games can be used for 'bonus' content. I'm sure, as you develop your game, you'll end up with some artwork that you'll have to cut due to slight changes in the plot etc. Having these as bonus images outside, which can be unlocked via a mini-game, I have no problem with. You can also do this, on a personal level, if you're planning on learning to code and want to give it a go at making games. Just trying and avoid including them during you main plot line.

 

[WeirdWorld]

The last batch of characters for now, I think I probably have enough to work with. I've mostly finished the intro to the game, just got to finish the last branching path for it. I wanna get a bit into the first chapter before releasing a demo though.

Anyway, here's the characters:

Spoiler: Characters

You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.

​

 

[WeirdWorld]

Hey guys, took longer than I expected but I finally managed to put together a demo, it's still rough so I'd appreciate any feedback you can give. Some specific questions that come to mind is how much longer should it be before I make a game thread for it and release it as the first part? And does anything strike you as weird in the story? Pointing out grammarical errors is appreciated as well.
Thanks a lot!

PC

You must be registered to see the links

You must be registered to see the links

You must be registered to see the links

Mac

You must be registered to see the links

You must be registered to see the links

You must be registered to see the links

 

[Lust Demon]

I deleted my initial response because I was exhausted, stressed out and mostly drunk as Hell when I posted it. Mostly sober me, and after playing through your latest demo I'll answer your questions.

-How long should a initial release be?

TBH, I have close to a TB of games I've played from here and I'd say most 0.1 releases would've ended at the end of the park scene, so you're good on content so far.

-2DCG vs 3DCG. what do you reckon is more appealing? I'm a big fan on both so I can't decide.

The artwork is good. It's not a masterpiece, but it's fitting and different. What I mean is, it's not another DAZ/anime/HS clone. The quality is more than good enough to pass and it's unique. It's also fitting to the scenario of Western society.

-Most 2DCG games I see on this site have some form of gameplay element or sandboxyness rather than just being straight visual novels, is this better? Is gameplay good? Or does it just get in the way?

That decision mostly depends on you. Do you want to formulate systems or write a story? From what I saw, you're very good as a story teller. Sandbox vs. story have their own costs; you either have to lose the story elements to make things more open or close things off to be able to tell a cohesive story. That doesn't mean that a story can't have choices, but the more choices the more scenes you have to make and there's a limit to that, hence the choice.

There are things about you that I can pick up (and I don't mean that as creepy/stalkerish as it sounds), I just don't know a better way to put it) from your writing and I think it's a bonus to your ability to write; especially a story like this. Most of the writers fit into a certain box and you seem to be outside of it. You've used a bit of that to your advantage unconsciously. IMHO, if you used it on purpose it would elevate your work even further. The only criticism I have on your writing is spelling and grammar, which I assume is because you're typing it all directly into the program rather than writing your story in a word processor first.

-Visually showing the protagonist, yay or nay? Summertime Saga and Taffy Tales come to mind when I think of 2DCG games and they show the protag, but most jap visual novels don't, a lot of Daz ones don't too. What's better? Showing protags or not showing protags?

Personally, I like seeing things unfold from an outside perspective. My feelings aside, I think it would be hard to "pound home" the changes the protagonist goes through without showing them to some extent.

-I also just want to ask for advice in general. Feedback on the art, feedback on the premise, on the gameplay, everything.

I mentioned the art above. It's perfectly fine as-is. In line with that, it has music which is better than most. It changes to fit the scenes and works out pretty well.

The 4th wall break on the sex scene in the bathroom is a nice touch.

The premise is a mostly new one or at least a good twist on existing ones and that's always good. It's entertaining, IMHO you've taken it in a good direction as well. Let's face it, in this day and age, every story is pretty much a rehash; but this one doesn't really feel that way. As I said before, you tell stories well and I believe that's your biggest strength: Play to it.

The only real criticism I have (I tell people "you can't do that" for a living, LOL) is the name "Bill's Park" which sounds weird as a park name to me, but OK. Well that, and why did the crazy chick abandon him? Or at least not fuck and then abandon him. I hope you have an answer for that in an upcoming update. IME, the song "Crazy Bitch" by Buckcherry really does work that way. That said, even if my critiques go ignored or hated, I'll definitely watch this thread and playthrough future updates.

 

[WeirdWorld]

I deleted my initial response because I was exhausted, stressed out and mostly drunk as Hell when I posted it. Mostly sober me, and after playing through your latest demo I'll answer your questions.

Ha, I was probably in bed so I didn't see it, you're safe

TBH, I have close to a TB of games I've played from here and I'd say most 0.1 releases would've ended at the end of the park scene, so you're good on content so far.

Excellent to hear. I was probably more curious about this than anything else.

The artwork is good. It's not a masterpiece, but it's fitting and different. What I mean is, it's not another DAZ/anime/HS clone. The quality is more than good enough to pass and it's unique. It's also fitting to the scenario of Western society.

Much appreciated. I only started getting into art last year, so I hope to improve my style as I develop the game.

That decision mostly depends on you. Do you want to formulate systems or write a story? From what I saw, you're very good as a story teller. Sandbox vs. story have their own costs; you either have to lose the story elements to make things more open or close things off to be able to tell a cohesive story. That doesn't mean that a story can't have choices, but the more choices the more scenes you have to make and there's a limit to that, hence the choice.

There are things about you that I can pick up (and I don't mean that as creepy/stalkerish as it sounds), I just don't know a better way to put it) from your writing and I think it's a bonus to your ability to write; especially a story like this. Most of the writers fit into a certain box and you seem to be outside of it. You've used a bit of that to your advantage unconsciously. IMHO, if you used it on purpose it would elevate your work even further.

That's interesting, I'll do my best to get a lock in my writing style early on. Thanks for the advice.

The only criticism I have on your writing is spelling and grammar, which I assume is because you're typing it all directly into the program rather than writing your story in a word processor first.

Well spotted! I do indeed type straight into the program, it's just a lot faster. That said, you've given me an idea. I'll start copying and pasting it into word from now on to check the spelling and grammar. Thanks a bunch for this!

Personally, I like seeing things unfold from an outside perspective. My feelings aside, I think it would be hard to "pound home" the changes the protagonist goes through without showing them to some extent.

I mentioned the art above. It's perfectly fine as-is. In line with that, it has music which is better than most. It changes to fit the scenes and works out pretty well.

The 4th wall break on the sex scene in the bathroom is a nice touch.

I appreciate this, I was curious to how the music would hit, I don't have much of an ear for it myself. I'm glad it works relatively well.

The premise is a mostly new one or at least a good twist on existing ones and that's always good. It's entertaining, IMHO you've taken it in a good direction as well. Let's face it, in this day and age, every story is pretty much a rehash; but this one doesn't really feel that way. As I said before, you tell stories well and I believe that's your biggest strength: Play to it.

The only real criticism I have (I tell people "you can't do that" for a living, LOL) is the name "Bill's Park" which sounds weird as a park name to me, but OK. Well that, and why did the crazy chick abandon him? Or at least not fuck and then abandon him. I hope you have an answer for that in an upcoming update. IME, the song "Crazy Bitch" by Buckcherry really does work that way. That said, even if my critiques go ignored or hated, I'll definitely watch this thread and playthrough future updates.

Thanks a lot for your honest feedback. You've answered a lot of the questions I've been really curious about, and even some that I hadn't yet considered. I really appreciate it.

 

[pasamer]

do you animate them if yes how?

 

[WeirdWorld]

do you animate them if yes how?

Haha, not yet. I'm actually a 3D animator funnily enough, so it'll be a bit of time til I start attempting to animate this 2D stuff

 

[Silverfan936]

oh man I like traps and futas, and transformation too? sounds good enough for me x)

 

[demonhuntercrow]

just wondering are there going to be multi endings and also will there be an ending for staying a female?

 

[WeirdWorld]

just wondering are there going to be multi endings and also will there be an ending for staying a female?

Yes, but it's not gonna branch off to those endings for a good while.

Maybe on the female, but it won't be a full ending that wraps up the story or anything, it'll prob just be an ending where you just give up on the main plot and live life fucking around as a girl.

 

[Kennybv]

Looks amazing, the art style is great, the concept it's original and interesting. Personally I'm not a fan of seeing the Mc getting fucked by others dudes, but I'm grateful that is avoidable. I don't like porn games with play mechanics and grinding, like if I wanted to play something I'd play clash Royale or something like that, so I'd rather have the game as a straight novel. That being said I can't wait for future updates!!!

 

[Rorrecros]

Great game man, love what you have already. I am a sucker for degenerate shit like gederbent cock sluts

Spoiler

You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.

 

[boomboom0]

Links for demo are out of date.