Had great potential but let down by several issues.
The good
Interesting characters like the mentor who's taken you in and lots of the LI's
Lots of good banter, pranks etc. and fun moments
Interesting idea for the world, magic system and tons of lore, even if that's all just in text form, not really seeing it.
Reheads
Great names
The bad
The writers golden rule of show, don't tell, is completely ignored.
All stays in one place, which gets a little boring.
Plays out like an Isekei, it's straight to living in a mansion with superpowers and immediately engaged to lots of women. No build up or plot.
A lot is said in relationships which just doesn't land from a storytelling perspective, it's stated in words but the actual story shows something quite different. This is the show don't tell issue. It's told to you in dialogue but you don't see it, or evidence of it throughout. So there's a dissonance, I have attempted to feed this back to the dev but it's been shot down vehemently. Perhaps I chose the wrong words to convey my meaning, easily done... like I was trying to get across to them, sometimes our words don't match what we're intending to put out there.
Unfortunately this project is part of the agree or fuck off crew.
A shame because some of the major issues, which are to do with how the relationships are told, rather than shown, I did have a useful suggestion for, not that it has to be used but it could be useful. And there are plenty of other ways to improve it which I haven't thought of I'm sure.
The main LICerys is very playful and full of banter, and during sex scenes she doesn't lose this at all, but does state that she was a virgin. This just doesn't land at all as she comes across as having no apprehension at all, not even a hint of fear that things could go wrong, she's super cocky and acts like it's just a normal tuesday, it's a bit too pornstar like, totally in control, as if it's her job, and so the writing which is saying, oo look you just popped my cherry just feels disingenuous. Again I've fed that back to the dev but I just got their back up rather than anything else. Upset that I used the word slut when describing it which I'm not really using to denigrate anyone, it just has a meaning which is someone who has loads of sex with lots of different people, I don't use it to insult anyone even if others do and I wasn't using it to insult in this case but again like I say, I just got their back up. We all have triggers, that's obviously one for them.
Another way of looking at the Cerys issue is to take a look at her statements, vs how she acts outside of sex, she says she's been waiting, celibate for 7 years for Rane, that's a massive deal right there. Anyone who'd done that would be under a huge amount of internal emotional pressure, that's a lot of hope you have to keep stoking, without any signs of life whatsoever, no indication that what you're waiting for is ever going to work out. It's just huge, and if done properly would make this into a really touching story, it could be really romantic and I presume was intended as such. But because not one thing she does, acts out in her behaviour or conveys in any other way shows this to be true, it just comes across as a really weird thing to say and false.
In writing having high stakes is really important, there has to be an emotional consequence to things not working out, it's why having characters lose their nerve is such a good tool in writing. That shows you the stakes are high and they're afraid of losing something. It doesn't have to be that they get nervous but there does have to be something to show the stakes or it's just dead and flat, and this is the case here.
There should be some serious emotional turmoil going on if her reunion was written well, there should be a massive reaction to Rane showing up after a 7 year wait believing him to be dead but also holding onto hope that he's not and they'll get married and have babies and live happily ever after and so on. So where is all of that reaction? Because I didn't see any of it. It could go many different ways, she could be furious at him, raging for a while, she could retreat into herself and just blank him because it's too much, she could be nervous as hell. But basically anything other than the way in which she does act, which is completely unaffected and comfortable during the whole thing, including the sex, would make this at least somewhat believeable.
If people aren't affected, they're just confident and together, everythings fine, then there's no story. It's just flat instead. When nothing goes wrong, there's nothing to write about.
And my personal dislike, which really is personal, and therefore not the reason for my rating which is based on the other points.
I'm not saying everyone should dislike it, it's fine if you like it... but the cuck talk ruins it for me. It's minor granted and some people insist that it's not about anyone else, even though the writing leaves no room for it to be about the MC. But it's there and ruins it for me rather thoroughly.
Stuff like that is fine, really it is, just put it in the tags, make it clear in the presentation, or early enough in the story, instead it comes outta nowhere. Something somewhere saying btw this character is going to paint a graphic image with how much she loves licking balls and having previous lovers cum drip out of her would be nice. Cos that was gross, again SUBJECTIVELY, I found it gross. I'm not saying it's objectively, factually, unequivocally gross, I'm saying I personally was turned off by it. If someone started telling me about how much they enjoyed ball play, cock worship and having cum drip out of them as soon as they get their kit of and I've never touched them, I'm gonna be pretty repulsed by that as it's obviously not me they're talking about and I have a very visual imagination, if someone describes a scene, I will see it. So I would then see that happening.
Part of the devs response was, it's a different world, not planet earth and so women in this world are always confident about sex, even if they're virgins. Which is an issue in that it means you've dug yourself a hole there, now it's all flat, there's no gradual learning process, everyone starts out a pro so there's no sense of progression it's just a plateau.
But the issue with this as an explanation again breaks the Show it ffs, don't just tell me it rule.
You have chatting about Football... of all things
Drinking Coffee
Chilling in front of the TV
Driving in shiny black cars
Normal looking woods at the start
Normal planet earth modern western style mansion where they're all living
Normal western style clothes
A normal swimming pool
Tactical vests
Standard issue guns...
All of which tells me this is planet earth, not a different world. Not one thing about the world itself, and I mean outside of the characters like there's an elf, shows me that this even could be another world, let alone definitively is another world.
The dev might have added magic people and different names to it, but it's planet earth. The most problematic of these examples being Football, as it's such a specific and wildly popular sport known across the world. You can't include that and then say it's a different planet so that's why people act differently. This contradicts itself too badly for it to work.
Again this has a solution much like the previous issues would with some stakes added in, a sense of the writing being true. This world issue could be fixed by either, not saying it's a different world, just agreeing it is Earth if you wanna keep all the same stuff in there. But then you can't have everyone acting quite so casually about sex.
Or if you wanna actually do it properly. Find a different, out of the way culture and use that as inspiration. Turkmenistan for example, I haven't ever been there, it's not only out of the way, it's pretty different so taking from that would feel different for most people. Or go even more remote, but use something that isn't well known to almost everyone on the planet and create a different feeling world all round, i.e. not football... Use ancient culture or whatever the hell you want but if it's an Alien planet, which is the statement, do that, don't just say it is but fail to back it up.
What is shown says one thing, what is told says something completely contradictory to that and this is throughout the whole project. This just happens to be F95 and we care about the LI's here so that was the bit I pointed out first but really the whole thing contradicts itself at every turn.
There's a lot of touchiness about what you are and aren't allowed to like it seems, and stating a personal dislike, despite clearly stating it's personal and even taking the piss out of myself for reacting to it, gets some people really upset.