Would you play this game? [3]

[TacoHoleStory]

People asked for more information in my pitch to be able to vote, so here it is. I also revised the pitch a little.

Story pitch:
After returning from my deployment with no idea what to do next, I called my childhood friend for guidance as I’d done so many times before. I was surprised when the shy girl insisted I moved in with her, and even more surprised that after getting drunk together, she awkwardly started flirting with me. But maybe I was misreading signals. Living in a warzone didn’t leave any time for women, so saying I feel pent up would be an understatement. Besides, she’s my childhood friend, it would be weird if she was flirting with me. Right? Even if she was into me, she’s not the type of person to act on it.

But I have more pressing concerns. Despite living in the middle of nowhere, my finely tuned senses keep alerting me to danger. The patter of footsteps outside and shadows moving past the windows at night. I assumed I was imagining things, but recently I arrived home to find our house ransacked and my computer stolen. I need to get to the bottom of this before something worse happens. And my new roommate is definitely keeping something from me, she locks her doors at random times of the day and seems to have a huge abundance of cash, despite claiming to work as an IT consultant. Maybe she knows more about the break in than she’s letting on?

Game pitch:
This is a choice based sandbox game with many minor paths and a main path that will be altered by deciding to romance, dominate or mix the two in your pursuit of your roommate and other characters. This game includes a simple point and click mechanic with a button that highlights all non-secret items so you don’t have to spend time searching for items to advance the story. This game is focused on story but is light on reading.

Tags:
3DCG, POV, Animated, Male Protagonist, Handjob, Masturbation, Sex Toys, Voyeurism, House Setting, Exhibitionism, Interracial, Light Male Domination, Creampie, Anal Sex, Oral Sex, Sleep Sex, Vaginal sex, Threesome, Consensual rape roleplay, more to be decided.

POV - roommate in her bedroom:

 

[Doorknob22]

It doesn't work like that. Do you think that when Nirvana recorded Nevermind they called people in advance asked them if they would listen to the album? As a creator, when the drive to create eats you from inside, you create, even if you'll be the only person in the world who will play the game.

If you think about the game, lay awake at night imagining characters, chew your food while hearing dialogs in your head ,sit down and write the fucking game.

On the other hand, if you're not burning to write it, give up. It's not for you.

Motivation:

You must be registered to see the links

 

[C.L.A.N]

If you're not sure about your game, make a small demo. Just for yourself, to test your skills, motivation, and creativity. There're many concepts that look cool on paper until being poorly implemented by a developer. Once you have the demo - present it to the audience and collect feedback. And then decide if your game concept is worth your time and efforts.

 

[Pretentious Goblin]

If I saw this in Latest Updates, I would skip right over it, though that's not a criticism of the OP, just personal taste. There's nothing to reel me in in terms of fetishes/tags, and the words "choice-based" actively put me off as I mainly prefer games that have some kind of meaningful gameplay. And as I said in the previous threads, the story only matters if the sexual/fetishistic aspect of the game draws me in (though if I start it up and read a bunch of Engrish/Runglish/Frenglish I'm guaranteed to shut it down and uninstall it regardless).

 

[ArtofFart]

Besides, she’s my childhood friend, it would be weird if she was flirting with me. Right?

Is childhood friend or friend who child?

 

[Yooshi]

It doesn't work like that. Do you think that when Nirvana recorded Nevermind they called people in advance asked them if they would listen to the album? As a creator, when the drive to create eats you from inside, you create, even if you'll be the only person in the world who will play the game.

If you think about the game, lay awake at night imagining characters, chew your food while hearing dialogs in your head ,sit down and write the fucking game.

On the other hand, if you're not burning to write it, give up. It's not for you.

Motivation:

You must be registered to see the links

Wise words from a wise man.

 

[TacoHoleStory]

If you're not sure about your game, make a small demo. Just for yourself, to test your skills, motivation, and creativity. There're many concepts that look cool on paper until being poorly implemented by a developer. Once you have the demo - present it to the audience and collect feedback. And then decide if your game concept is worth your time and efforts.

Already did this and this is the result of feedback and development. Original game in signature.

Is childhood friend or friend who child?

View attachment 1324320

This is the face and body i based her on so idk how the character is giving you that idea.

 

[TacoHoleStory]

It doesn't work like that. Do you think that when Nirvana recorded Nevermind they called people in advance asked them if they would listen to the album? As a creator, when the drive to create eats you from inside, you create, even if you'll be the only person in the world who will play the game.

If you think about the game, lay awake at night imagining characters, chew your food while hearing dialogs in your head ,sit down and write the fucking game.

On the other hand, if you're not burning to write it, give up. It's not for you.

Motivation:

You must be registered to see the links

That's all well and good, and on my first attempt (signature) I worked on the game for 8ish hours every day for a month to get it done.

Each time I've posted here I've found little things to change which would have been impossible to change if i had just jumped into it. For example, someone just said the model seemed young to them which is not my intention and would have been impossible to change if i had just jumped into it and done all the renders.

Nirvana had their band mates for real time feedback as they were creating music.

 

[Doorknob22]

For example, someone just said the model seemed young to them which is not my intention and would have been impossible to change if i had just jumped into it and done all the renders.

In my opinion, it's one thing to ask for advice for minor things like outfit or hair style, but asking random internet dudes about the whole plot and premise of your game? Where is your belief that your idea rocks, if you ask strangers for their input on its very core?

Again, my humble opinion: you set to create something because you believe it's fucking awesome. You don't care what others people think because they are wrong and you are right. It's OK to consult with other on minor details but if you doubt the basic concepts of your creation, you might not have enough conviction to move forward when things get nasty and boring and despairing.

Unless, of course, you want to develop a game which is supposed to make a lot of money, in this case you're treating the game as a product, not as a creation and this post is about you conducting a legitimate market research.

 

[Dushniy]

Seems a bit generic to me, no offence. But if you believe in it, just do it. After all, you should make a game YOU want to play, not others.

 

[ArtofFart]

Already did this and this is the result of feedback and development. Original game in signature.


This is the face and body i based her on so idk how the character is giving you that idea.
View attachment 1324637 View attachment 1324640

Becuz you base on someone dont mean it look like this.

I base on Sama Hayek




No be mean to you but she look like leetle girl. If pedofilia game is ok is your kink no prob. If not pedofilia game then this good you no now that she look like leetle girl.

 

[TacoHoleStory]

Pretty sure you're trolling and exaggerating, but I made small adjustments to the character model to fix it.

 

[desmosome]

I probably won't play it since it's sandbox. You might be one of the rare dudes who makes sandbox work, but I wouldn't bet on it. The premise already sounds like a story driven affair, so I fail to see how doing sandbox stuff in a limited environment can help. At best, it will be a wash where the sandbox doesn't become an grating annoyance. At worst, it will actively detract from the experience. I always say this, but sandbox should be reserved for specific stories and gameplay systems that are actually improved by the freedom. RPG adventure, catch em all type of game, actual life sims with a big map and many interactions, that type of thing. Unless you have some system in mind where uncovering, preparing for, and battling the baddies is a significant aspect of the gameplay, I don't see the sandbox helping.

 

[Deleted member 1536527]

From the story alone I don't really personally see anything that would draw me in.

But I have to agree with some of the criticisms above about the character design. You'd be surprised at how many people you can draw in to play your game from just having an interesting name, and most importantly, having a hot character. The current character looks too prepubescent. Giving her slightly bigger breasts, broader hips, and an overall meatier body wouldn't hurt. The face is fine mostly, though a little more maturity there would be good as well. And the fact that you based her off of a prepubescent looking real life model doesn't really excuse it as well imo. Because it doesn't really translate over too well into 3d. You can tell by just looking at the pictures.

EDIT: In the second pic she's looking slightly better, but the almost non-existent tits aren't helping much lol.

 

[gunderson]

This feels, if I may, like you took the most standard "childhood friend" ren'py game plot and added a very mild complication to justify not leaving the house much. I've seen it probably an actual thousand times by now. This isn't to say you can't make it interesting, but that'll depend on your skills as a writer, as an artist, and as a game designer. The premise isn't doing much work for you.