VN Ren'Py Bring Your Girls - Development thread

[The M.O.]

I was not sure if I should start a thread at all asking for help on my game at all. However, this is better than starting fifty threads everytime I get into difficulty.

Straight into it. The plot is...
A group of men bring some of the most downright horrible women on the planet to a type of hotel/game arena.
The main character talks with the other men about the girls, interviews a girl, then they all partake in viewing a tournament to the death featuring the girls.

Now, I have a certain list of the most despicable people I can think of. I was not sure about certain characters before. I want to let one go now.

Here is the list, and can anyone help with a suitably mean replacement?

H.I.V. Woman - Known to be wantedly spreading venereal disease without a care for others.
Cartel 1 - The type of woman that some of you might have heard of. A favored and famous killer woman of the favelas.
Bit-Coin Queen - Was found to be planning to convert a country's money into Bit-Coin in such sizeable amounts as to destabilize the country's economy.
Taiwanese girl minder - Brutal to the girls under her care.
Murderer - Standard, since childhood killer. Started with other living creatures before people.

I have one more, this I want to change.

Assassin for hire.

I can't really find a realistic use case for a globe trotting woman doing this for hire. It's just too unrealistic. Can anyone think of a replacement?

 

[Avaron1974]

Assassin for hire.

I can't really find a realistic use case for a globe trotting woman doing this for hire. It's just too unrealistic. Can anyone think of a replacement?

So a female assassin for hire is unrealistic ..... but they exist so .... how is it unrealistic?

 

[The M.O.]

So a female assassin for hire is unrealistic ..... but they exist so .... how is it unrealistic?

I'm not talking about someone that will take 5 thousand. I'm talking about someone that takes 30,000 and looks for repeat work. There are not enough feuds and deaths to feed such work, that's before the female aspect comes in. I can't have it. I can't write her in.

 

[RedPillBlues]

Youre game is about a tournament to the death, as if realism really matters.

 

[Avaron1974]

It's already going to be niche, I doubt anyone that will play will be looking for realism.

I mean, you're only going to get the extreme hardcore kinda players in a game about killing.

Most people come here for the sex and the gore/vilence side of that has always been very niche. You won't be getting the players that value story and realism, a lot of those aren't into extreme violence.

With a deathmatch setting the only thing they will care about is how violent they die.

 

[The M.O.]

Youre game is about a tournament to the death, as if realism really matters.

It's up in the air why these men are doing this. It's going to be left up in the air, of course. I have to confront this though, the fact she sticks out as a red herring every time I open twine is one thing. It's another, when I'm constantly drawn to write her as being the most aloof, most everything. And these men have to talk a bit themselves.

With a deathmatch setting the only thing they will care about is how violent they die.

That's serious. I can't go first person and have to put in third person views. The fights are going to have to include something exciting and interesting.

 

[The M.O.]

This issue it is still at me. I need a replacement and my brain is not doing it for me. Common f95!

 

[lordparcival]

How about an evil scientist who willingly spread a disease so powerful it eradicated half of the/her countrys population? Would also be a good part for the plot depending why the men are doing this.

You could probably also leave the player in the dark why that mysterious woman is not known for her crimes if she has done any.

 

[The M.O.]

How about an evil scientist who willingly spread a disease so powerful it eradicated half of the/her countrys population?

That something I was on to earlier. I find it hard to get behind the notion that someone would do that to people in their own country. Also, a scientist implies someone that is really intelligent. That just comes with being a scientist. I might go with an underling to someone like that, I don't know what an underling would be to a chief scientist other than a solider though.

Thinking about it more, your right. I can tie this type of person into the plot as well. In a very deep way as you suggested. Thanks

 

[lordparcival]

Well who would willingly deny that we currently have a global pandemic? Who would work his ways so that he never really leaves the leadership of the country he is in (Looking at all Diktators here)? Who would willingly bomb the civilians of his own country? There are so many people here which are just plain nuts. And it all depends on what you want to build into your story and if its a "fantasy" world or if you want to base it on the real world.

Why should there be no Evil Scientist who killed half the population to weaken it for another country to invade it and conquer it. She could also be the Military Leader of an Invading country which slaughtered half the civilization to state an example or something. I for myself would prefer something more deep seated since you have the plain murderer Type of women with the other characters already. Except maybe for the Bitcoin Queen which also has to be smart.

If you change the Scientist to Scientist / Military Leader you would also create that Background easily + have some combat experience on hand so she would better fit into a fight to the death.