Insisting the MC has to be a self insert is such a weird take. I only see it on this site. If it was any other way, video games wouldn't even exist. There's no way for an MC to represent every player as a self insert, just not possible. Gender, race, age, ethnic background are all going to be different, and it's not a problem for normal well adjusted gamers, just an issue on here.
I'm with the posters that said they don't like seeing women abused, in submissive positions etc. That's why I don't like female on female, or maledom in general. Vanilla is boring to me because my real life was all vanilla, so when it comes to a game it's just pointless for me, why would I care about picking some options and watching some video game renders for something that's obviously far more enjoyable irl? Games on here are amateur devs doing a hobby, which can be fun, and they take that adult lean as the hook. But they don't have the resources and ability, and the ones that have ability and a great idea would naturally seek a larger audience to appeal to with a non-adult game, so the stories and characters have a certain ceiling to them. The adult stuff really has to hit with you personally. If that means you have to self insert, then that's what it will be for you personally, but that will so severely limit what you can play as a result.
The irony is also that one of the foremost devs on this site and in femdom games in general, is a woman. And there are a few other women too. They can make male and female MCs, and can play the games, but the male playerbase insists they are themselves incapable of such a thing? Hey we're in a femdom thread, so I'm all for declaring female superiority, but that's just silly.