[R> Other] [R>Proofreader] Unpaid Looking for proofreader/'pulse check' for post dystopian fantasy VN

Aug 29, 2019
22
32
Project:
It's a post dystopian fantasy VN trying to be a slice-of-life for an overworked soldier/guardsman that decides to hire a maid. Hijinks ensue.

Developer Author:
Me

Looking for:
Someone to proofread the initial first draft as well as provide a 'pulse check' to see if the idea has legs.

Employment Type:
Unpaid, but a firm thank for the help regardless of where the project goes.

Work commitment:
I'm at ~85 screen pages or ~15k words. Probably around 1-2 hours of reading for a single go.

Preferred method of contact:
This thread.

Job Description:
Basically I'm looking for someone who can read the script of the first couple days and offer feedback before I start doing the renders to make sure I'm not wasting my time on something that A: isn't interesting, and B: isn't at least somewhat unique. Don't want to slap this together only to find out from players that I rewrote an episode of dragonball z or something embarrassing like that.

Additional comments:
I've attached the script PDF for anyone interested. Feel free to roast, toast or anything in between in the comments. Thanks for the help regardless.
 
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kane331

New Member
Aug 22, 2019
5
1
Hey man just finished giving your script a read, and I gotta say it's good. It's unique enough setting wise. Core concept reminded me a lot of futoku no guild, but I'm glad that it leans more heavily towards the slice of life stuff. I personally enjoyed reading it, though I might be biased because I'm a sucker for slice of life stuff. Proofread wise I haven't paid much attention yet, but aside from a few typos it should be good. Good luck if you decide to actually go all in on this script
 

Death0rGl0ry

New Member
Jul 7, 2018
13
45
Apologies for the late response, I didn't realise how long ago it had been posted until after reading your script, I'll keep it brief.
It's an entertaining read, seems like a good concept and you appear to be a talented writer, I think you should definitely move ahead.
In terms of uniqueness, I don't think you've subconsciously ripped anything off, certaining nothing springs to mind.
I felt a bit of a Pratchett vibe in your writing which was a nice surprise and made me pleasantly nostalgic :)
I really hope you have decided to move forward with the project because I'd love to read more!
 
Aug 29, 2019
22
32
Thanks for the feedback, I'm glad that it was an enjoyable read. I actually made the decision to move forward with the project a while ago, just a bit slow going as I make/re-make/re-re-make renders for the first chapter.
 
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