I have to ask... Is this being written by an AI.? Because everything from the renders to way the story is being set up looks great, but the writing is very robotic to the point where it sometimes borders on nonsensical. Like it's being done by some kind of AI that's still in the process of learning how human speech works.
Maybe it's just because English isn't the developer's first language, but this game could really use a proofreader.
Also, please consider dropping the narration. It doesn't really add anything and most of the time just ends up being confusing since it constantly jumps between past tense and present tense for no reason(the same thing happens with a lot of the "inner thoughts" by the way).
You don't have to write things like "she starts with the limbs" when we're watching someone apply sunscreen. It's a VN, there's no need to tell us stuff like that when you're already showing us a render of her doing it. Instead, you could replace that with something the MC might be thinking like "mmm, that's nice and cool" or something similar.
Here's an example;
"The boy stood stiffly, hands folded in front of him, hot and sweaty, perhaps deferentially awaiting Wanda's accountability, or perhaps he was hiding something between his legs, an indescribable sense of joy and excitement, and we all knew which."
Honestly, the only way to describe that bit of narration, is that it's very awkward. Again, much of what's being said here is stuff we could've filled in ourselves since we can actually see it happen.. The choice of words is again making me feel like an AI wrote this, it just feels very unnatural.
And who are "we all" at the end there? It sounds like we're supposed to imagine some narrator -who's also an unseen third party observer at the same time- is reading this to us or something? It just doesn't work, and only ends up feeling rather disconnected.
Again, besides all this the game does look great. I'm just trying to give some constructive feedback as I feel like the writing could use some work, or at least a proofreader with a good grasp of the English language.