- Jun 28, 2019
- 221
- 525
I know right? Who they think they are? Models?Those poor people with their lopsided shoulders!
Don't worry. Im working in more poses and expressions! Coming soon!
I know right? Who they think they are? Models?Those poor people with their lopsided shoulders!
Yep, I'm working on more content right now! Thank you for stopping by!Not a lot here right now. Needs more content to really be able to make a reasonable evaluation.
Which one? is the face, the pose or something else? I try to improve the game every time I can, so every info is more than welcome!Seems ok so far, although some sprites look kinda awkward. Will wait for a proper demo or somewhat finished build to judge further.
Oh yeah! I completely agree! 100%!! Unique style is why someone call himself an artist. You have to be different and special! And that is what I'm trying to accomplish here. I hope in future versions of the game people can see that style, it is difficult in just a few samples to see (there is no much content now). One of my relatives is also into drawing and stuff and you can see clearly as day that our styles are completely different. His lines are more hard, thick and straight than mine. I can't do that, mine usually are more rounds and soft...Something for you to think about. Most artists should have their own unique style. The most famous artists all have their own style and it's often imitated. Expecting an artist to draw everything perfect isn't actually art, in my opinion. For instance, my brother is a known tattoo artist who can draw quite well and is compared to "Sailor Jerry". When he's not doing tattoos, he draws his own style and always hides a "blemish" in every single art. That "blemish" is actually his mark hidden in plain sight and people often mistake it for a weird smudge but trust me, it's not a smudge. It's him.
The artist should always do the best they can with their own ability. But they should develop and refine their own style to get better over time. For example, I can post a picture here and you'll know it's DarkCookie's art. Why? Cuz it's different, it's his art. It's the same thing with people when they request my brother to do tattoos or commissions. It's his style, they're fans and they want that.
Just a doggo reminder that you don't want perfection, you want art.
Good luck. I will definitely keep an eye out for updates.Yep, I'm working on more content right now! Thank you for stopping by!
Thank you! I agree with most of the points you made.Hey, just wanted to say thanks for conceptualizing such a visual novel, even though English isn't your first language. Have you reached out to any native speakers to ask them to look through/edit this in the future (right now probably wouldn't be helpful because there isn't much text)?
Also wanted to compliment your art style, I think it's so refreshing to have as many distinct looking characters as you have.
Some points I wanted to say about the artwork in particular:
- The detective's eyes look way too big in proportion to the rest of his face, it makes him look like a child.
- Some other commenters have spoken about how lopsided the shoulders you draw seem to be. If the difference between them weren't so extreme (but not too straight, keeping the original style intact) I think that would be best.
- The photograph background images are well chosen and pleasing to look at. This isn't a major thing but I hope you keep them similar to as they are now instead of replacing them with hand drawn art.
Anyways, good luck with the rest of this! It seems like an ambitious work, especially because you're doing this solo and don't have many paetrons yet. I sincerely hope you'll be able to be happy with the project.
I know there is not much at the moment. Trust me. I think the same. (What you see is 4 months of work). But now things would go faster.Uhh... not much thing there and looks good but something good always ended early or discontinued with not even a good 'apologise'(not saying you're but we'll see) like most game with nice art like this(Except GGGB and some other certain games for sure). I will not become your patron 'for now' but i look forward to this game update
Why thank you! I really appreciate it!Raging Hetrosexual here, just wanted to comment how great the name is for the subject matter.
Yes! Of course there will be hair in the futur!just a completly random question (as always , from me)...
do you plan some more hair in futur ?
like moustache, beard, chest hair or else... its not like its bad without lol, but it may add a bit of variations and "realism".. i mean, not all men are full shaved if i can say
that's maybe a point to take into consideration in futur.
imho, variation and originality is a big point for success, nobody want to play the same thing over and over, it always become boring after a moment. (many peoples here can agree on that .. right ?.... right ?.. anyone ?....)
Oh, Aaryn!It's been almost 2 years since I launched my demo and I was fucking terrified. I want to commend you on the work you have here so far and feel like I can relate with how slow and tedious that process can become.
You have a really good starts here. I'll chime in with everyone else and compliment the artwork. You have talent, man. I'm not usually a fan of sprites but I like your use of them combined with the full screen images. While that probably slows down production, it felt more immersive with those full screen scenes and helped tie things together.
I'm definitely not one to critique writing because I had zero writing experience when I started my own game. But your writing style seems personal and I really like that. I think having a personal involvement in your game will likely increase the chances it's completed--something a lot of games around here never see. Your writing quality is far above the quality of most VNs. If I had to say anything to improve, I would encourage you to slow down the pace of the game or maybe use more fades for scene transitions to allow the reader to catch their breath. It felt jumpy in spots like when the MC is exploring the area. You're pretty good with the writing part, though. For me, I just have my MC think a lot. I saw some of those personal touches of your MC in the opening scene and I found myself wanting more of that.
I will say, I love the game title. It's fucking brilliant. I smiled a few times at the wit of it. You definitely nailed that part, bro.
I'd also recommend on your title screen to put a link to your Patreon. While you posted your game here for free, others will take your game and reproduce it on other websites. Since you're doing your game free like I do, you probably won't care because it's more exposure. However, the people on other sites would have to Google your game and hunt to try and find it if they do want to donate. If you're new, you may not pop up on many search engines yet, losing potential followers. Just easier to have a link to your Patreon site on the menu.
(As a side note, you could put a link at the end of the demo. I've seen people do that before but I think it looks really shitty when they do it)
I also respect you for interacting with the community. That personal touch is something that people really appreciate when they get behind a project (god, i feel like there's a gay joke there...). Stay humble and open to feedback from people. Just be sound enough in your vision to know what's good feedback and will compliment that vision versus feedback from people just bitching and wanting to see what they want to see.
But overall, solid job, man. I like it so far. Like others have said, the gay genre needs more games that aren't furry. I also like that you're going the erotic route, too. I love me a slow burn and story-driven is the most important part to me.
Imma keep an eye on this one
Ok, for the record i still think it's funny that you were actually on my Discord and I didn't realize this was your project until yesterday, lol. But seriously, I'm completely humbled that my project gave you motivation. I'll never fully figure out a way to say how i feel about that but it's pretty warm and fuzzy. But enough about me...Oh, Aaryn!
I really appreciate your worlds. I really do. You are the main reason and inspiration behind this project. It would not exist without you and your game. I started this one like 3 years ago and dropped it. I was terrified nobody would like it and they would troll and break my soul.
Two years ago I found your game and then your discord. And it blew my mind. I wanted a piece of it, ngl. I was (am) so jealous of all that you have accomplished...
Anyway!! I agree with you on everything. I need to find time and focus on the writing and pace down a bit. I find myself always with the deadline and I rush things and no time to write inner monologs and the MC thinking... Hopefully that the sprites are done (for now) I would focus more on the MC inner thoughts and deep conversations with other characters. This is not a PORN game after all (is it? I don't know anymore).
I love slow burns if the story is great. In yours it works perfectly. In mine, I still need to find the characters voices, personalities. You have made that look so easy...
With this game I want story. I want art. I want romance and sex. Not just guys shagging around just cos they are bored. After all, this is a cathartic game. A way to express my feeling about a life it could have been and never was...
Again,. Thank you, Aaryn. (and sorry for my rambling!)
Hopefully I will keep you more than interested!