- Thread starter Neo_Nimaru
- Start date
- Oct 11, 2018
- 125
- 134
the pacing of this game is alittle jarring. it just jumps from one thing to another so quickly. like you meet Lyne and suddenly you both accept that you're in another dimension with absolutely know buildup in the conversation and next thing you're pretending to be someone else with the same name and assuming looks whoses life apparently Lyne knows all about.
- Nov 22, 2018
- 611
- 700
Oh boy... Here we go.
Firstly, story-wise, this is pretty interesting. There are more mysteries than I can count, and I'm looking forward to understanding what's happening in this game... Though some of the details in the early game are a bit bizarre, like how MC is just 'given' a new family in this new world. Still don't know what to make of that.
Language-wise, it's a disaster. While it's all understandable, you can't go three lines without pausing and going, "That's not right." There's periods missing in the early parts of the game, tenses are weird, the occasional typo (like escape with only one 'e', 'trought' instead of through, etc.), odd word choices...
There are also a few continuity errors, though they're mostly one-liners. For example the 'recap' at the beginning of the chapter 2 file shows a few things that are skippable, like MC being handed the detective's card, and agreeing to do something for Alana. There was also a line before the option to join Lyne in the shower where she says, "No, we are going to end fucking. I'm tired for that." Which is a great example of how bad the English is, but also, it makes no sense for her to say that if they never fucked, but she'll say it regardless.
Speaking of Chapter 2, the 'choicelynesex' variable is wrong. It's supposed to be 0 if you refused sex with Lyne, but in Chapter 2, it's instead checking if it's 2, which leads to a weird jump after the first fight with the elf. Also, if you ignore Alana's event in the alley, you get an error later in the cinema when running into her.
To conclude: I like this game, quite a lot in fact. Interesting lore, plenty of choices, engaging plot... But it needs work, especially in the English department. Looking forward to seeing more.
Firstly, story-wise, this is pretty interesting. There are more mysteries than I can count, and I'm looking forward to understanding what's happening in this game... Though some of the details in the early game are a bit bizarre, like how MC is just 'given' a new family in this new world. Still don't know what to make of that.
Language-wise, it's a disaster. While it's all understandable, you can't go three lines without pausing and going, "That's not right." There's periods missing in the early parts of the game, tenses are weird, the occasional typo (like escape with only one 'e', 'trought' instead of through, etc.), odd word choices...
There are also a few continuity errors, though they're mostly one-liners. For example the 'recap' at the beginning of the chapter 2 file shows a few things that are skippable, like MC being handed the detective's card, and agreeing to do something for Alana. There was also a line before the option to join Lyne in the shower where she says, "No, we are going to end fucking. I'm tired for that." Which is a great example of how bad the English is, but also, it makes no sense for her to say that if they never fucked, but she'll say it regardless.
Speaking of Chapter 2, the 'choicelynesex' variable is wrong. It's supposed to be 0 if you refused sex with Lyne, but in Chapter 2, it's instead checking if it's 2, which leads to a weird jump after the first fight with the elf. Also, if you ignore Alana's event in the alley, you get an error later in the cinema when running into her.
To conclude: I like this game, quite a lot in fact. Interesting lore, plenty of choices, engaging plot... But it needs work, especially in the English department. Looking forward to seeing more.
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bel/alana/sophie scene makes you just seem like a cuck sitting in the corner with 3 lesbians going at it
then alana starts talking down at you. rage inducing honestly, but i'm biased since i'm not a fan of lesbians.
if you skip it you miss out on lyne/kim content too....unfortunate
then alana starts talking down at you. rage inducing honestly, but i'm biased since i'm not a fan of lesbians.
if you skip it you miss out on lyne/kim content too....unfortunate
Not yet but there will be.
Thank you, I was looking for something like this. I'm going to look again to everything you wrote down.
And about the English, I know is bad and maybe the "I'm trying my best" sometimes is not enough. Is a shame I can't publish the game with my native language, it would be a lot better, or maybe not lol.
Nonetheless, I'll try to improve it overtime since is already bad. It can't be worse, right?
Mmm, I didn't think the scene in that way, more like showing Alana's personality. Either way, you can kiss two of the girls in the same scene.
- Mar 30, 2019
- 23
- 12
found a little non game-breaking bug. traceback attached.
Also, just a liittle suggestion for the english version: I can kinda assume how spanish works given that I'm italian, so I can understand the mistake, but you must always add a subject to each phrase in english, you can't really "imply" it. I have seen decades of "is..etc" (ie. "is ok") without "it" at the start of the phrase. Not a big deal though, it's still perfectly understandable overall and it isn't jarring at all. I have seen much worse
Language (and the fact that there are no men aside from mc and mayybe vito trying to romance girls in the entire city) aside, fucking amazing game. Thanks a lot for your work.
edit: I have read LGM's comment on the english used, and while I agree with him, you learn some things only over time, so I'm not too fond of criticizing stuff like "throught" and the like. The subject part though? That's easy to learn
Also, just a liittle suggestion for the english version: I can kinda assume how spanish works given that I'm italian, so I can understand the mistake, but you must always add a subject to each phrase in english, you can't really "imply" it. I have seen decades of "is..etc" (ie. "is ok") without "it" at the start of the phrase. Not a big deal though, it's still perfectly understandable overall and it isn't jarring at all. I have seen much worse
Language (and the fact that there are no men aside from mc and mayybe vito trying to romance girls in the entire city) aside, fucking amazing game. Thanks a lot for your work.
edit: I have read LGM's comment on the english used, and while I agree with him, you learn some things only over time, so I'm not too fond of criticizing stuff like "throught" and the like. The subject part though? That's easy to learn
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I encountered an error, here is the traceback :
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Is sophies mom Jess a vampire? Her eyes are like Lynes. Couple other girls with off color eyes but otherwise normal so im chalking it up to regular honey select anime style color pallets. But jess has those cat eyes that lyne has. I know near the end she was talking to Kim about searching for other vamps in the area.
Hey DEV, just want to say that I really like this game and it has a lot of potential. My only complaint is, as with most games, the MC is too forgiving. If someone tries to kill you as Lyne has. You do not accept it without at least some doubts. Kim wanted her freedom so what she did is forgivable and she didn't know you yet. Too many games have the MC shit on by almost everyone around him and he will just let it go with either no explanation or an "I will tell you later." I realize it is just a game but it would be nice if that aspect was a little more realistic. Immersion into the character always leaves me feeling like a pussy when I play this type of game. So I would like to be able to question the actions of others. When they do such untrustworthy actions against me.
Well this was just food for thought. And again I think you are doing a great job overall.
Well this was just food for thought. And again I think you are doing a great job overall.
Reread the dialogue after the fight. They don't outright say it but Kim gets pissed off at Lyne because she interfered in that fight. Lyne was never going to let Kim kill the MC. She wasn't just exhausted, whatever caused Kim to pass out came from Lyne.
That is true. However Lyne lied to the MC about what happened to Kim. Said it was due to starvation. And after Kim wakes up
she only hints that Lyne interfered. So the MC just letting it go and continuing to blindly trust Lyne is completely unrealistic.
But as I said most games tend to do this and the DEV has the right to tell the story as they see fit.
She does hint to the MC that Kim passed out from hunger but she also tells him that she wouldn't have let anything happen to him. The MC did seem to not completely believe that right away but he drops it. Either because he decides he does trust her or he decides that he has no alternative but to. I really don't think he'd have fucked her right then and there if he didn't decide that he trusted her though.
Just began playing your game. Great thing in it, it's music and sound effects, I can honestly say that in that department your game is one of the best here. But Engrish... I cannot say it's really strong, I saw worse. But absence of "it" in sentences ("it is" not just "is") where "it" must be is quite annoying. I don't know your native language (and why you can't make multi-language game), English is not my native too, I'm Russian, but I was taught even in school at my first year of English language (when I was 11) that there's no sentence in English without subject and no verb can be used without subject. Just like you write "I know is bad" and "Is a shame", both sentences lack of subject, "I know it is bad" and "It is a shame". Please remember that for those of us who do not speak English as their native read English with such errors... believe me, it's real torture, literally.
But beside subject problem and occasional mix of meanings of words (native speakers can give you examples I'm sure) your language is quite good and it's interesting to read.
Just a suggestion, maybe it's worth to have a native English speaker as a proofreader. AFAIK, some people here can do it.
I noticed the same thing. Jess' eyes has vertical pupils, just like cat's eyes. I don't know if it's intentional but maybe it's part of the plot.
Neo_Nimaru, I found an error in chapter 2 after MC shooed away Vito with a kiss:
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- Aug 15, 2020
- 297
- 1,988
Unofficial Android Port of:
A World Between Us [v2.5.2] [Neo Nimaru]
My android port has an alternative save location, the save will remain intact when you uninstall the game so don't worry about starting over. And my port has a textbox opacity slider and text size slider and added change name to the main menu.
if you like my ports, consider buying me a cofee
A World Between Us [v2.5.2] [Neo Nimaru]
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if you like my ports, consider buying me a cofee
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or
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as to motivate me and get me going to do more ports, and help me pay for mega storage, thanks