Funnily enough most of the issues you have with Patreon (which you've stopped using) are actually imposed by the payment processor - Paypal (which you're still using). I don't want to go into details, because this is not the right thread to discuss that, but do some research.
True, but the irony being, you can just send a donation/payment with paypal, and they'll never know why you sent money there.
All you need to do, is setup a cheap website, saying your donation will go toward an unnamed development time of a game: Ie: you're paying time for the dev, without specifying a project, because there's actually no legal reason he has to mention what he is working on in details for you to "decide to donate to him" on his own website.
Hell, the dev only has to say (not actually needing to produce anything either) that is he also working on a non adult VN, and it's done. The reason Patreon has to clamp down on things to begin with, is because people describe exactly what they're doing there and even host their files there.
There is another payment provide ccbill (but there are many others), if patreon was willing to do things right, they'd just stop using paypal, and that'd be the end of it. The fault still lies with Patreon in the end
. Considering how much money paypal must be making off of it, they'd more than likely soften up.
Anyway, dev, stop using Patreon, there are other solutions nowadays ^_^
I'll finish with these words of wisdom for the day: Incest is Best
