Comics Collection BigYikes123 Collection [2024-04-09] [BigYikes123]

[rebirth095]

I think what you've put here is amazing and really puts into perspective of what I missed. Sadly I never thought to do this because I've never experienced what it's like first hand as these thoughts don't come naturally to me. Having you explain this is very helpful as it shows how I can structure and explore for another scenario that encorperates this. If you are willing to share your personal experiences about femininity in a personal message to me, I would love to know more as my experience stops with clothing.

I'll be honest, my writing this particular example is not from first hand experience. Of course, I have some submissive fantasies (and dom ones too), but a lot of what I did when writing the example is continuously force myself to write "action-reaction". And those actions/reactions I always ask myself, how does this characterize this character? Like you see in my example, I knew that how the main character responded to being pinned would set the tone and show us how he felt in that situation towards being a sub. So I had to brainstorm and think about how I wanted to develop the response. Surprise was a good first emotion. It's consistent with the scene, since Chloe's never been this dominant before, and surprise is a motion without real negative connotation (as opposed to sadness, anger).

Here's an interesting thought experiment. Imagine if as the first emotional response, I'd used happiness instead. Where our main character took glee in being pinned and forced upon. That wouldn't be out of character for a sub. But it's also a very different first reaction to have. And the introspection would be very different.

You can get better at this by practicing on other works. When watching a show, make note of the word choice, the way it's spoken, the body language. Think about why you feel the way towards a character after an action. And then think about why that is. Then, as an exercise, try to recreate that scene in words. Or, just go on Fictionmania, or any fanfiction website and read a story. And really think about all the mistakes or oddities you're seeing. Especially on fanfiction, read one with characters you are already familiar with, and you'll notice all the mistakes writers have made. Times when the character should be upset, but isn't. Times when characters don't act their age or fail to respond when they should.

Anyway, I'd love to share anecdotes if you have scenarios/questions, but I also think that a lot of this comes from writing exercises and literary critique. A few summers ago, I took a lot of writing challenges and REALLY got out of comfort zone to write all sorts of stories and characters. That and I had a great English Lit teacher that tore a lot of my essays to shreds and gave me perspective on analyzing stories and characters. So if you'd like some help developing that skillset, I'd also be happy to go over those exercises. Since you've not used this forum before, you'll need 5 posts before you can private message, just as a heads up.

The only problem is that I'd run out of space if I wanted to write as much as I do. So I will need to look into how to do as you've stated while maintaining the amount I can write.

You may want to consider a "light novel" or "short story" format. Write out your text, and the end of each part, have the accompanying picture. Then post the entire thing as a pdf.

Are you restricted to a certain image height? I don't personally think it'd be a problem if your images got taller, if it meant that you could use bigger font and format the text. Unless there's some posting limitation on deviant art I'm unfamiliar with?

I really did want to explore more costumes with 'FromTwitchToOnlyFans' but couldn't find anything that good unfortunately. I'd also limited myself to 30 pictures and found it hard to tell the story if I was comitting 2 or 3 of them to showing off the costumes.

Honestly, I totally respect you setting a limit and working within those confines. It's a good exercise. And totally understand that you're limited by available material.

 

[misseva88]

I also agree that a timeframe should have been present, I like the example given that shows the dates. Once again I never thought to do this but it is something I will implement in the future. I usually go for timeframes of 1 year as then it can be viewed as a realistic timeline for changes and each month can be a step into the process.

Like LBJ and Rebirth have said before, I hope you don't take the criticisms too hard. My own criticisms come from a good place. It's brave to open yourself to the world when hitting the publish-button on a story. I'm happy to have added a tiny bit of help in improving future stories. I'm here for them. I like the voluntary stories, so your topics are right up my alley. They're not too common these days, so I think you've found yourself a nice niche to operate in.

Regarding the formatting, I come from a background of caption making a single image so it was natural for me to follow the same process of having a single picture followed by a wall of text. I find Melissa's style with caption bubbles hard to describe what characters are feeling and highlighting changes unless you're willing to make the caption comic go over 100+ pages to fill out every detail in multiple text bubbles. I don't want to make stories that are 100+ pages as it just isn't my thing. I might experiment with a speech bubble style comic in the future but it would be under 30 pages and I feel like it would serverly limit how much can be explored.

Was there a point in the creative process where you considered having the text on top and the image below it? As things are now, the pictures are about what happens in the text below and I feel the pictures being supportive to the text would work better, i.e. below the text rather than above. Especially later on, when we see actions happening in the picture that don't happen until halfway into the text.

 

[BigYikes123]

Anyway, I'd love to share anecdotes if you have scenarios/questions, but I also think that a lot of this comes from writing exercises and literary critique. A few summers ago, I took a lot of writing challenges and REALLY got out of comfort zone to write all sorts of stories and characters. That and I had a great English Lit teacher that tore a lot of my essays to shreds and gave me perspective on analyzing stories and characters. So if you'd like some help developing that skillset, I'd also be happy to go over those exercises. Since you've not used this forum before, you'll need 5 posts before you can private message, just as a heads up.

Yeah, I'd be more than thrilled if you were to show me those excercises. I do have the next story in mind that I don't mind sharing to you if you can start a convo with me on this site. As I don't have 5 posts yet I physically cannot, but I believe other people can.

You may want to consider a "light novel" or "short story" format. Write out your text, and the end of each part, have the accompanying picture. Then post the entire thing as a pdf.

I could definitely look at doing a PDF. I'm just not sure how that's going to translate into Deviant art as I upload individual caps there. My images are already pretty wide, they could get taller but it would just mean that the overall image I rendered looses quality and you'd have to zoom in to really see details within the image.

 

[BigYikes123]

Was there a point in the creative process where you considered having the text on top and the image below it? As things are now, the pictures are about what happens in the text below and I feel the pictures being supportive to the text would work better, i.e. below the text rather than above. Especially later on, when we see actions happening in the picture that don't happen until halfway into the text.

I can see your point. This once again stems from my caption making background where'd I'd do text at either the side or bottom of a cap. I think the main problem is that I am having different events tied to one image so it can get slightly confusing. For example, the first piece of text might be on the same day as the image but then the next paragraph could be a week later.

 

[misseva88]

I can see your point. This once again stems from my caption making background where'd I'd do text at either the side or bottom of a cap. I think the main problem is that I am having different events tied to one image so it can get slightly confusing. For example, the first piece of text might be on the same day as the image but then the next paragraph could be a week later.

The image could serve as a divider between the two scenes if it's a clear scene ender too.

But I think the best example is on page 14. you have 4 paragraphs. If it were me arranging the layout of that page, I would have the first three paragraphs of text, then the picture and the fourth paragraph below the picture. That way, your main character is still driving the story via her thoughts through the text. We first read her thoughts and her questioning herself about her hair length before we actually see the picture (well, if you'd read it as intended). I'd say that way the image truly enhances the story.

An other example is page 19. I'd insert the picture after the "My heart was pounding in my chest as time seemed to slow down the more my eyes drew to the mirror...", on the first line of the second paragraph. You've built up the curiosity with the text and I'd reveal the look after that.

Going from captions to longer form stories is a very cool move, I applaud you for it. These are definitely solid starts that have piqued our interests, so kudos for that.

 

[rebirth095]

I could definitely look at doing a PDF. I'm just not sure how that's going to translate into Deviant art as I upload individual caps there. My images are already pretty wide, they could get taller but it would just mean that the overall image I rendered looses quality and you'd have to zoom in to really see details within the image.

One way of doing it is to upload just the image, and have the story in the description (like this JoeSixPack story:

You must be registered to see the links

). And then, after you're done posting all the parts, post the pdf that contains the whole thing in the format you want.