That's Control. It shows up as Dominance when above zero, meaning the NPC is acting dominant to you, and as Submission when below zero.
I believe you can - there's events for that in the code. I'm not too sure how to reach them. It seems that you need to have the Dominant inclination and have a partner with low control:
Code:
<<if $pc.has_inclination("Dominant") and setup.people.get_attitude($eventnpc, "control") lte -100>>
<<link "Being <<pp>> dominant" EventPlayerInitDiscussRelationshipSub>><</link>> <<dchangerelationship $eventnpc "submissive">>
<br>
<</if>>
But I'm not sure how to lower their Control. It might be that they need to have the Submissive trait for it to even be possible.