VN Ren'Py Elysium [v0.5] [Xtudio]

3.00 star(s) 7 Votes
Discussion Reviews (7)
risky0

risky0

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Oct 7, 2022
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Xtudio said:
yess there will be.
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Dialogues don't feel natural, but other than that, I liked the game. I recommend rewriting the dialogues, and please don't rush — part of the game feels like it was done in a hurry.

LI: My hero!
Mc: Yes.
LI: Let's make love.
There is no such dialogue in the game. It is just an example.
 
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Xtudio

Xtudio

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Game Developer
Jan 26, 2024
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AnyName'llDo said:
Agreed. There's no way this guy has progeria.

Separate, minor issue: multiple characters refer to the MC as John. I did not name him John.
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Forgotted said:
as of 2023 ai said there have been no known documented cases of a male with Hutchinson-Gilford progeria syndrome fathering a child. Also if they did, there would be a 50% chance the disease would be passed on to the child.
---------------

Edit.... it says the same about Werner's. 50% chance of passing the disease to children, and 0 documented cases of a father w Werner's having kids.


I know it's just a game but I was curious....not trying to be a buzzkill. Sorry.

At least a few people are talking about it.
Cool huh
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Niuul said:
Not really feeling the MC. It's certainly a...choice... to make them look like that and give them a form of notreallyProgeria. You can look older than you are without saying they have a highly deforming condition where you're lucky to live past 20. But you won't really look older than your supposed aunt while having forehead wrinkles and deep crowsfeet.

I can only assume the dev just didn't want to use an MC model that's way over used or looks like Sir Chad Gigadouche.
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Aninass said:
I'm really having problems adjusting to the MC. It's just a bit too bizarre to me. Progeria is a very real thing, but you won't see this type of things happen to a person with progeria (they rarely survive their teens). Maybe that disconnect is keeping me from adjusting to the MC.

It's not even because the MC looks bad, Lust Academy MC looked bad, but I liked it.

I just can't explain why. A real shame because the female character models are amazing.
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bapcules said:
I don't want to judge the developer, but I suspect that he has absolutely no idea what progeria is...
Or does he mean something else?

In any case, the MC has a body like the Spartan Leonidas...
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diras2010 said:
Bingo, I think the dev is confusing the medical terms here, based on the description, the MC might be having some sort of cognitive disorder, whereas the person doesn't easily differentiate the pass of time, or maybe is having Early stages of Dementia
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SteelyDan14 said:
Okay... for real... there is NO way this dude has progeria. Is this set in the future or something? What did I miss? The average lifespan, with treatment, is only 20 years. This guy looks perfectly healthy.
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I want to clarify something about the MC’s condition. He is not actually suffering from progeria. In the story, his rapid aging is caused by the impure mana he’s been harnessing — something the doctors in his world don’t understand. Since they couldn’t pinpoint the true cause, they assumed it was a rare aging disorder and prescribed progeria medications.


That’s why I designed the MC to look older than his age. I admit it was my mistake to phrase it in the game’s description as if he was 100% confirmed to have progeria. I’ll be updating the description soon to make this clearer so there’s no confusion going forward.

Thankyou for the feedback
 
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Xtudio

Xtudio

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Jan 26, 2024
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Engulfed said:
Only a couple minutes into the game and this is some Vincent Adultman level dialogue.

"Well Auntie, I'm off to the office (in my jeans and t-shirt) to meet the client and do a business."
"Have fun. Don't forget your power-rangers lunchbox. I put cookies in it for you."
"Yay! I'm a grown up!"

I used to wonder why so many games on F95 were set in high-schools. Now I realize it's because 99% of devs are still in it.
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Requah said:
The dialogue in this VN feels like AI chat bots trying to have a normal human conversation.
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risky0 said:
Dialogues don't feel natural, but other than that, I liked the game. I recommend rewriting the dialogues, and please don't rush — part of the game feels like it was done in a hurry.

LI: My hero!
Mc: Yes.
LI: Let's make love.
There is no such dialogue in the game. It is just an example.
Click to expand...


I agree 100% with all of you — the dialogues definitely need a lot of refinement. All of them were written by me, and I’ll be the first to admit that writing dialogue isn’t my strongest skill.


Once I reach a certain level of income from the project, I plan to hire a dedicated dialogue writer who can really bring the characters to life. Until then, I’ll keep doing my best to improve with each update.


Thanks for your patience
 
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Issikka

Issikka

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Jan 27, 2022
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Xtudio said:
I agree 100% with all of you — the dialogues definitely need a lot of refinement. All of them were written by me, and I’ll be the first to admit that writing dialogue isn’t my strongest skill.


Once I reach a certain level of income from the project, I plan to hire a dedicated dialogue writer who can really bring the characters to life. Until then, I’ll keep doing my best to improve with each update.


Thanks for your patience
Click to expand...
The game needs to be fleshed out a bit more, currently as it is the scenes seem rushed and too short to really tell any kind of coherent story, also there are words missing in some of the existing dialogues.
Renders are good, there just needs to be a bit more of them with added dialogue to make it more substantial. Currently it feels like those videos that cut to a different scene every 3 seconds and end up just being confusing and incoherent.
Best of luck with this, i will keep an eye on it for sure.
 
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waldo404

Newbie
Dec 5, 2020
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quick question... how do they communicate 'inter-world'?? when lyra talks to MC, both the first time to tell him to come over and not die and ep0.5 emergency. time dilatation is about 1h <> 1month right? so lyra kinda have to drop 1 word every 5minutes or so (0.4s/word <> 288s/word - for average speaking speed in english at 150 words per minute - dixit
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). I try imagining saying "emergency" in 5minutes... keeping coooommpooosuuuure...

on the same topic,
screenshot0001.png
Lyra: "come quick it's an emergency!"
MC: "gimme 1min, aka 12h!"
Lyra: "..."

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PS: those updates totaling 5min of gameplay.... arg. better to wait for more consequent ones, really
 
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Aninass

Aninass

Member
Aug 31, 2020
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Xtudio said:
I want to clarify something about the MC’s condition. He is not actually suffering from progeria. In the story, his rapid aging is caused by the impure mana he’s been harnessing — something the doctors in his world don’t understand. Since they couldn’t pinpoint the true cause, they assumed it was a rare aging disorder and prescribed progeria medications.


That’s why I designed the MC to look older than his age. I admit it was my mistake to phrase it in the game’s description as if he was 100% confirmed to have progeria. I’ll be updating the description soon to make this clearer so there’s no confusion going forward.

Thankyou for the feedback
Click to expand...
Well, in that case, change the MC's hairstyle at some point. It's not like he can't even take care of his hair, right?
 
Nizzquizz

Nizzquizz

Active Member
Oct 20, 2017
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"One month here is an hour in your world" - "we've been watching you your entire life"

So a factor of roughly 720 ... so, by the age of 18 .. they've been watching him for about 13k years? Holy shit, give those bitches some Netflix, they must be bored out of their minds...

Yep, that's my biggest issue with the game :LOL:
 
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e6mill

e6mill

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Aug 4, 2022
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Ozygator said:
Huh.. 5 release and zero actual sex? At least going by the tags. Interesting choice.
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The releases are on the short side. There are plenty of slow-burn VNs around. The tags need updated now. All of those statements are true.
 
Jnx

Jnx

Active Member
Jun 6, 2017
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I wish I checked the changelog before DLing. That's on me. The current amount of content is what should have been the first release. I can't imagine playing this earlier. Not only would there be no sex, but the story wouldn't have even started.

If you played this any earlier, all you would see is a 40 year old man living with his 25 year old aunt, inviting someone to live in a household he doesn't run. Now, you learn he has magical progeria, because too many people pointed out how old he looked I'm sure, and elves were watching him because.... His parents died and he started working out? I know I'm being hyperbolic for emphasis, but not by much.

Also the English sucks. They forget to capitalize letters almost every time. Words, especially articles, are just dropped from sentences. I know British does that but not in the way its done here.

I'm so tired of getting what little time I have to play games like this wasted by more of the same disappointments.
 
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3.00 star(s) 7 Votes