Ren'Py - FatesCrossed [v0.2.1] [VitaYok]

I'm going to be honest, I might sound harsh, but this game has really good potential but in my opinion not in this form as it is presented now.

Haven't tried the sandbox version, this review is based on the VN version.

The renders and H scenes are great, that's the only reason I'm giving it a 2 star (almost 3).
The sound effects and music are great, glad that the 'grunting' got towned down, it was quite annoying in the beginning.

The story is all over the place, sometimes really hard to follow what is happening. Not sure if sandbox version is better or not in this case.
The 'engrish' also doesn't help, but the dev is not a native speaker and I can kinda look past that, but it doesn't help the writing itself which kinda comes across quite bland.
The dialogues are very basic , don't except anything extraordinary.

Every... single... line... of... dialogue... takes... 20... seconds... to... read...
This is the worst in my opinion. Almost every single line of dialogue is full of 0.3s pauses, sometimes even after every word OR even a '...' is broken up into 3 x 0.3s pauses.
Please drop this bad practice, it doesn't add anything value to the game, only irritates the player.

No rollback after choices, which is also a bad practice, don't punish the player this way. You can't circumvent save/reload anyway so it is pointless to deny rollback after a choice is made, you only make the player irritated.

Now, this game has all the best building stones of a great harem game: (/s)
- former all girl school with lesbians (I'm kinda guessing here, also it was mentioned in game as well to a point)
- slut LI
- abused LI (almost rape victim)
- onlyfans LI
- random people fucking (probably just some NPC and only happened once but still, the first dick you see in the game is from a random NPC fucking 2 other NPCs - at least I hope those girls are not LIs)
- no romance (now this might be my personal preference, but it looks like this game headed to more of a fuckbuddy instead of a romance relationship building, but maybe I'm reading it wrong)
- poly-harem (now this is just an assumption based on the whole game takes place in a former all girl school, but I get the vibe that this is not going to be a 'pure harem', which is fine IF the player gets a choice, if not than that's another issue)

I don't get it, maybe 2 out of 10 harem game dev makes the effort to actually do some research into what harem game players looking for in these games.

This game have great potential, a 4 or even 5 star rating from me, if the english is fixed and the story is presented better, also drop the pauses in dialogues and remove the rollback deny.
For me a few LIs are not redeemable, hopefully it's possible to avoid the onlyfans girl, the femdom girl and the slutty one too, but I doubt that the slutty one is avoidable as she is determined to help MC fuck as many girls as possible.

Overall the game is below average right now, but has potential.

Good luck to the dev!

I would like to rate this game higher but having to decipher the meaning of what they say even though it's in english which is my native language. is making it tough.

Just that is one thing, but the way they deliberately say everything while saying nothing at all sometimes.

What kind of dickhead sees a shrink then refuses to answer questions and worse speaks in obtuse round about ways? You're getting free counseling you spent days seeking out and then you act like you're trying to avoid getting counseling!?!

Other then the incredibly antagonistic way the general chatter is written this is a pretty fun game with neat ideas. The visuals are pretty nice too.

I hope this game gets a good once over and the english writing is improved. It would be 4 or 5 stars if it wasn't so infuriating to read at times.

Game version: 0.2

The short version: Interesting visual style ruined by horrible writing.

I liked the UI-design and the unique font style of the game when I first started the game.
But after a minute of gameplay, the good first impression was already ruined by the BS of text you getting spammed with.

The intro is helluva confusing and IF the conclusion of this was about to get revealed later in the game, I'm not even interested.

The writing is just so.. stupid and feels almost childish most of the time (maybe it's just due to bad translation?). I couldn't stand it for another minute, so I started skipping through the text- to check whether there was something worth my time to go on. But sadly, there wasn't. The few lewd scenes I stumbled upon were mediocre at best and the story wouldn't get any better.

No recommendation.

Beautiful graphics, a bit overly saturated background to my taste though
An actual variety in gorgeous LIs
Original story, meaning MC is not Mary Sue, whom all the girls fall in love with right away. Not brain dead LIs
Human interactions feel much more realistic than in many VNs on this site

Kudos to the Dev for adding VN mode (would never have tried this game in sandbox)

Although there are some flaws, it's a game with good potential. When you're thrown into the game - nothing is clear, and as the story progresses you understand that there is some mystery, a mystery that VitaYok will reveal to us in the next updates!

Reviewing V0.1

Pros :
Good graphics and cinematic
Good storyline and characters well developed
We have to salute the work behind

Cons :
You can't be lost easily if you don’t have the patient to look for yourself and follow the steps
The storyline for me is interesting but a bit repetitive, and without money or a lot of time playing the game you can lose interest
Good UI but small
For further versions maybe more help for the player who don't know what the developers want from him and what to do clearly


My opinion :
This game has potential but sometimes it's complicated and you lost a lot of time trying to no what to do, hope the further versions will be more clear for the player and simple (i'm not trying to spend 4h per day in the game).
Waiting for the next versions!

Reviewing V0.1

Pros
-The graphic is above average, maybe some fixing with the lights but nothing unbearable
- The UI looks cool
- The plot sounds promising yet vague, but it's the first version so i wanna considering more promising than vague (XD)

Cons
- Every character so far is unpleasant, and i mean all of them, not one that isn't an entitled asshole
- The UI while cool needs to be bigger, i had to squeeze my eyes to check some of the icons and options
- The english is barely acceptable but needs some proofreading or to use grammar-checking programs like Grammarly or LanguageTool or write the dialogue in Google-Docs
- Most of the content is grind...like 80% of the game is grind, 10% is figuring out where to go or what to do, the rest is...not even plot, just scenes. You can't make money day-by-day, you must wait every Monday which means that every week monday-to-friday is like: wake up in your room-> dress up for school -> go to school -> first lesson-> interact with people(to develop character-arcs you must talk 10 times with each one of them)-> go to lunch and if you can interact with people -> skip enough time to trigger the afternoon lessons-> do the afternoon lessons-> interact with people-> go home or do something like checking an area in the city for some quests like finding replacements for the computer-> sleep->repeat until Friday, then Saturday and Sunday is just skip time or do stuff to move the clock forward.

Conclusions
I tried to be fair, but more i play and more the flaws of this first release became evident and painful to tolerate, like a punch in the stomach. Sorry.