You have a lot on that plate, so let's break it down into bite-size chunks and push the peas away from the mashed puhderders.
A) Eliminate the middleman in your transactions by having your own website where you can get money through a variety of payment methods. Middlemen (Patreon) won't allow you to link their competitors on their site. Having one payment method shut down (eggs in one basket) doesn't shut you down, if your fans can still reach you.
B) Paypal has rules, but they are not as strict as some people think. They have rules for transactions, where goods are sold, and they have another set of rules for just sending money for no reason at all, nothing being delivered. If you aren't doing anything illegal, you should be able to work within the rules, one way or another. Gambling, **, human trafficking, money laundering, etc. is not allowed.
C) Making a website is easy, we're talking about game developers here. Some devs already have their own websites, and some have their own servers running their games. An extra $100k here and there is nothing to sneeze at, but if you can't be arsed, that's fine, keep giving your money to a middleman.
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Your website can have any number of webpages, related, semi-related, unrelated, and hosted. For example, your game page can be separate from your art page. Your members pages, can require login.
D) Censorship is one thing, but what Patreon and Facebook are doing is another. Even if it were perfectly legal
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it's still wrong, and I can't condone rewarding that kind ofbad behavior. Giving Patreon 10% is funding terrorism, IMO.
F95 is doing a damn good job at promoting Adult Games, and making them available. The modding community

kicks ass.
Modders help the players get more of what they want, and in doing so they shield the game dev from blowback.