I want to play, but I am very new to this type of game. What to even do? Is there any guide out there that's literally step by step for noobs until I learn to navigate the game myself?
The wiki linked in the OP has quickstart guides that offer suggestions you can follow, without spoilering too much.
In this game you can walk about, trigger events, do various jobs and hobbies, fuck around and follow a number of story arcs, normally related to specific NPCs. Certain encounters happen at specific times and specific places, you can plan to trigger them, often these encounters boost relationship with one or more characters. Some have a RNG component, so you may or may not trigger them.
Work to improve your look (skin care, get your teeth fixed, practice makeup), as some events trigger only once you're above a threshold, others have variations according to your attractiveness.
Cultivate relationships with NPCs, that will eventually open up their quest line (check the wiki for characters with a story arc).
Develop your skills and attributes, some arcs are also enabled by crossing certain thresholds.
To enjoy the game, I consider essential to set your alarm to wake up early each day and define a morning routine you can do without even thinking. If you start as a schoolgirl, consider having a different routine for school days and weekends/holidays).
Example: my weekend routine is usually get up 6:30, put on sports clothes, kitchen, take vitamins, eat breakfast with family, talk to mother, do yoga with her (if your relationship is high enough), bathroom, take a bath (30 min, improves skin), apply moisturiser, brush teeth, deodorant, exit, use mirror, apply makeup routine. The entire routine takes about 2h and gives you daily boosts in relationship with family members, fixes your needs, boosts your skin, gives you some training (which is factored in daily with food intake to determine whether you gain weight, lose weight or maintain) and a little Spirit xp (yoga).
At about 9h you can either go out and meet people, or spend some time on your hobbies. Things you can do at home include sewing (if you buy a toolkit and materials at the supermarket) and music (need to buy an instrument to play, cheapest is guitar). You can train at home, go jogging, run in the track. What exactly is the most convenient, depends on where you are: in the city you have the academy (expensive) but you can also jog in the park or play beach volleyball during summer. In Pav you can also jog in the park, run in the school track, or purchase several training classes at the community gym (cheaper than academy). In the village you can also jog.
Get a job to make money - the wiki gives you an idea of what works best.
And so on - much of the game is about setting up a routine that gets your stats going and repeat daily, varying according to scheduled events as you get to know them. Then pursuing different story arcs.