Ren'Py If I Could Change [v0.1] [Jordini345]

[WhyDoYouwannaknow]

The character design is pretty good for the women, but the men are kinda bland, so maybe some improvement there could be made. The poses on men also feel way too "dainty", if they were exaggerated and openly gay it would okayish but idk (I know this is a difficulty with this engine, since I have seen a lot of authors struggling with this and when they try to compensate they go way too far into macho man territory)
The writing definitely needs a touch up, it feels very stiff currently and not very natural. Conversations are super hard, so getting a designated writer might help significantly. That's all I have up until now, I hope your development goes great and I will follow your progress, good luck

 

[menatv]

Pretty good start. Though not sure where the current content ends. It appears like I can't do anything else right now other than school/office. And sometimes when I try to go to the mall the shop/leave buttons don't work. And I am stuck there without any option to do anything. So have to revert to a prior save.

Other than that, I like what I've seen so far. Be interesting to see where this goes. Will keep an eye on it. Thanks.

 

[jordini345]

The character design is pretty good for the women, but the men are kinda bland, so maybe some improvement there could be made. The poses on men also feel way too "dainty", if they were exaggerated and openly gay it would okayish but idk (I know this is a difficulty with this engine, since I have seen a lot of authors struggling with this and when they try to compensate they go way too far into macho man territory)
The writing definitely needs a touch up, it feels very stiff currently and not very natural. Conversations are super hard, so getting a designated writer might help significantly. That's all I have up until now, I hope your development goes great and I will follow your progress, good luck

Hey, thanks for the feedback. It's true that the poses are not realy allways that good. I try to use standard poses wher it fits. Every "unique" pose I make needs time and the result in the end is not that much better that it's justify to make it for every scene. Chapter 0 got rewritten by a writer but I don't have the money realy to let the story be written fully by a writer. I will try to improve my writing.

 

[jordini345]

Pretty good start. Though not sure where the current content ends. It appears like I can't do anything else right now other than school/office. And sometimes when I try to go to the mall the shop/leave buttons don't work. And I am stuck there without any option to do anything. So have to revert to a prior save.

Other than that, I like what I've seen so far. Be interesting to see where this goes. Will keep an eye on it. Thanks.

I wrote in the changelog that it's only playable to day 3. You can check in-game on the phone in the stats the variable for the main story.

 

[FatGiant]

Actually, it can be both - there are games on here that are tagged that way - some parts of the game ar VN, some sandbox.

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BTW - just so i'm sure we're on the same page, definition-wise, are you using "VN" to mean where the storyline is fixed and inexorably proceeds to a pre-ordained end point, no matter what choices the player makes?

Because that's generally referred to as a "

You must be registered to see the links

"...

From this site rules: https://f95zone.to/threads/game-uploading-rules-2024-02-29.524/

VN: A game focused on story, with the vast majority of choices being dialogue based. Often has a minimal choice:text ratio.

And: https://f95zone.to/threads/tags-rules-and-list-updated-2024-11-14.10394/

Sandbox [For Free-Roam type of games.]

________________________________________________________

It is understood that a Free-Roam game, or for short a Sandbox, is NOT a VN. It only happens when the Sandbox content is either minimal, or cosmetic.

By the assertion of the Developer, that isn't the case here. Not only now, but also in the future.

So, this is NOT a VN. As such I will report it's Prefix so it isn't wrongly categorized.

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Why do I care? Because claiming that a Free-Roam game is Story based is erroneous. They are ONLY event based. The events may happen in a larger context, but since their order is by force of it's nature, irrelevant, the story doesn't really matter.

Why do I say the story doesn't matter? Because if you can do X before you do Y, or, do Z before you do X or Y, there's no consistency, there's no progression, therefore no story. It is the same as ripping all the pages of a book and shuffle them. The story becomes pointless.

Does this mean that Sandbox games have no story? No, it means that that story is only a scenario where the events happen on. Like a Movie theater. Each event is a Movie. That you can see in that Theater.

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Thank you for misinterpreting what I mean by VN. Yes, I am perfectly aware of what a Kinetic Novel is and also what a Visual Novel is. Neither of them are possible on a Sandbox model.

As you well said a VN as a storyline so the fact that a Sandbox removes the Line part by breaking it into events that can be played in any order, you just proved my point.

Peace

 

[jordini345]

From this site rules: https://f95zone.to/threads/game-uploading-rules-2024-02-29.524/



And: https://f95zone.to/threads/tags-rules-and-list-updated-2024-11-14.10394/



________________________________________________________

It is understood that a Free-Roam game, or for short a Sandbox, is NOT a VN. It only happens when the Sandbox content is either minimal, or cosmetic.

By the assertion of the Developer, that isn't the case here. Not only now, but also in the future.

So, this is NOT a VN. As such I will report it's Prefix so it isn't wrongly categorized.

________________________________________________________

Why do I care? Because claiming that a Free-Roam game is Story based is erroneous. They are ONLY event based. The events may happen in a larger context, but since their order is by force of it's nature, irrelevant, the story doesn't really matter.

Why do I say the story doesn't matter? Because if you can do X before you do Y, or, do Z before you do X or Y, there's no consistency, there's no progression, therefore no story. It is the same as ripping all the pages of a book and shuffle them. The story becomes pointless.

Does this mean that Sandbox games have no story? No, it means that that story is only a scenario where the events happen on. Like a Movie theater. Each event is a Movie. That you can see in that Theater.

________________________________________________________

Thank you for misinterpreting what I mean by VN. Yes, I am perfectly aware of what a Kinetic Novel is and also what a Visual Novel is. Neither of them are possible on a Sandbox model.

As you well said a VN as a storyline so the fact that a Sandbox removes the Line part by breaking it into events that can be played in any order, you just proved my point.

Peace

Just for the last time I never put the VN tag on this. The uploader put the VN tag ther. I only put the Sandbox tag in and I now removed the VN tag. I don't know why the uploader selected the VN tag.

 

[Nimbus Commando]

I would probably just put a gun in my mouth and pull the trigger.

 

[Dreamatrix]

Hey Jordini, the male classmate with blonde hair, is his name really Brain or a typo for Brian?

Will there be any interracial, ugly/fat old man, incest, lesbian, blackmail, etc other genres tags?

 

[jordini345]

Hey Jordini, the male classmate with blonde hair, is his name really Brain or a typo for Brian?

Will there be any interracial, ugly/fat old man, incest, lesbian, blackmail, etc other genres tags?

Hey thanks for catching this error. I have dyslexia and realy didn't catch that. In the next version it will be fixed.

For the tags I can say that in chapter 1 will definitely be lesbian and other things will follow definitely. With incest it's a bit more difficult, because of the rules from patreon and this site. Maybe I can make hints to it or something, but I don't won't to get in to that for now.