i was being coy lol
in truth, i'm actually a revoltingly seasoned veteran at this. despite this fact, i somehow made the rookie mistake of prioritizing actual, real-life vaginas over weird, fucked-up ones in h-games for a while, and accidentally became middle aged. then i wondered if there was still a bizarre subculture built around watching girls get fucked by dogs in sidescrolling platformers anymore, or if that eventually died out, and wanted to see what it looked like after 15 years of progress.
so i found this site. and at first, i was really impressed -- people have gotten organized about immediately and efficiently redistributing h-games. they're all lined up in one subforum, with a standard format for page 1 that ATTEMPTS to collate everything you need... but then i tried to actually play one myself, and i think i literally said "no way" out loud to myself when i realized that people STILL just:
- wander into a thread via hyperlink
- check the first and last page
- search
*save, translat*, uncensor*, and cheat*
- give up and rely on somebody helping you, but then that person unfortunately...
- isn't clear on whether they'll get thrown out if they straight-up post what is technically illegal software, so they...
- send it to you via DM, which...
- fucks over the next person who wanders into the thread.
and if nobody helps you on step 4, then you:
8. spend 45 min scouring obscure japanese blogs filled with horrifying mental health crises in an attempt to find all the required infinity stones to get your bizarre pornographic game to work, then give up and tug it with pornhub instead.
9. also, like 50% of people are genuinely too stupid to problem-solve their way through an ill-defined process you can't ask your friends to help you with, so basically all of them begin this list on step 4.
so what i was REALLY trying to ask was: how on earth are we dumb enough to spend 15 years doing something everyone instantly recognizes is retarded the first time they try to do this, without one single person fixing this hilariously inefficient and redundant cycle of effort? this site is just ULMF, but with a standardized original post and dark mode enabled.
you whippersnappers would never have been able to get pre-v1.0 Fairy Fighting or the original Vitamin Plus running.