Well I dont really have one. Besides the fact that I think it's hot
first of all spoiler alert
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I hope there is a twist to the story.
- Thread starter aborix
- Start date
first of all spoiler alert
I hope there is a twist to the story.
F95 technically only allows them to be updated once every 2 weeks. So in another week it will be updated.
aborix its already been a week since your last update. Maybe its time to update this art
I'm working on it don't worry! I'm just trying to figure out the pacing that I want for the story.
Sorry about being annoying. I was worried about the lack of an update, and you have no Patreon to read what the real update is. I thought you were abandoning this, but thank you for your reply and keep working on it.
take you time and suprise us with your VN.
if you want some ideas maybe we can give you an idea.
Speaking of pacing. I thought the sudden change was a bit hard for me to believe. I think you did a good job at hinting at it, with the dad always calling him cute and overtime him becoming used to it. I think the whole scene was too much at once and it pulled me out. It almost felt like they ought to have been two separate events or actually a dream. When he woke up and realized it was not a dream I felt like it definitely should have been, at least the second half. This would establish that the little bother, even tho a sissy, was able to push MC and dominate him, even if no penetration happens. Then the rest can be a dream that serves to reinforce in MC's mind that he's inferior and is starting to think about men and their sex. It gives the game time then to set up another scene where MC goes to work and his boss gets even more frisky, perhaps when passing behind him again he gives him a little push that can be played off as "oh sorry" i slipped. As we know MC already masturbated thinking about it at home and got spooned by his gf's brother. So he'll be wanting it by this point, it will allow you to illustrate that he's at at edge with some shots and reactions of that moment "building more tension".
Crossing the line so quickly in my opinion leaves a lot of the character's feelings unexplored, and ultimately I felt that it went from secret to completely open and accepting too quickly. I hope this helps
Keep up the great work.i was surprised when version 0.2 was released; there was no explanation why he had already accepted, THIS VN is not finished yet, so there are so many story to deliver and to tell ,Maybe we are surprised what will happen next .Crossing the line so quickly in my opinion leaves a lot of the character's feelings unexplored, and ultimately I felt that it went from secret to completely open and accepting too quickly. I hope this helps
I think the way you said would be better. slowly been corrupted is more fun at least for me.Speaking of pacing. I thought the sudden change was a bit hard for me to believe. I think you did a good job at hinting at it, with the dad always calling him cute and overtime him becoming used to it. I think the whole scene was too much at once and it pulled me out. It almost felt like they ought to have been two separate events or actually a dream. When he woke up and realized it was not a dream I felt like it definitely should have been, at least the second half. This would establish that the little bother, even tho a sissy, was able to push MC and dominate him, even if no penetration happens. Then the rest can be a dream that serves to reinforce in MC's mind that he's inferior and is starting to think about men and their sex. It gives the game time then to set up another scene where MC goes to work and his boss gets even more frisky, perhaps when passing behind him again he gives him a little push that can be played off as "oh sorry" i slipped. As we know MC already masturbated thinking about it at home and got spooned by his gf's brother. So he'll be wanting it by this point, it will allow you to illustrate that he's at at edge with some shots and reactions of that moment "building more tension".
Crossing the line so quickly in my opinion leaves a lot of the character's feelings unexplored, and ultimately I felt that it went from secret to completely open and accepting too quickly. I hope this helps
the problem of slow corruption is you know what happen next just like other VN no special or twist you already know they differ how the author delivered.
so how extream will this get later on ?
Femdom, forced prostitution ?, Uriantion ?, loli or shotas ? gangbangs (male and femaile) ?.
is any of that planed ?
Femdom, forced prostitution ?, Uriantion ?, loli or shotas ? gangbangs (male and femaile) ?.
is any of that planed ?