Just wanted to drop some initial reactions here. Overall the game does show promise, but I really felt a lack of refinement in the way the dialogue is being presented.
I'm finding that dialogue repeats itself a bit much and ends up being longer than necessary. Very verbose way of writing that honestly feels like padding. It is verging close to aggravating, using 2 or 3 lines to effectively convey the same thing that could be done in 1 line.
Also: Wake up, dialogue. Leave house, dialogue. Move screens, dialogue, Enter town, dialogue. Enter next area, etc etc... annoying the game stops you so much. And the lines in the box are horizontally long and seem to just fit 2 lines at most (which is unpleasant to read) instead of being in a more pleasant and compact book format.
Oh and in the first butt grope scene it's off-putting how the scene keeps switching from the standing sprites to the back ass shot. It is a special scene so the shot should remain on the focus which is the butt, or at the very least, use a trick and cut the screen in half, then display the standing sprites in one half, and the butt action in the other.
I agree on the middle paragraph about the control that the game takes away from you. I understand this is the tutorial/introduction section, so I get it, and I didn't mind it that much*, but I hope this changes later. Also some small tricks can really help improve the flow here. If you wake up and get the monologue (not dialogue) giving the player free movement might not be the best idea. You can just make the character move on their own without player input. This will also (in some RPG maker versions) allow the player to speed up the process of the character movements and dialogue by pressing down 'enter'. Once you left the house give the player some freedom to move on their own. Definitely room for improvement here.
I partially agree on the butt grope scene. It's not off-putting for me, but I can see OPs point. I still think the scene was very good, but I agree cutting back and forth too often can feel jarring. So maybe like OP suggested a split screen would do. Here are some ideas Id have:
1. Make the butt the background, half-screen, diagonal split, put the sprites in front of the background image. The composition would be something like this: left side: normal RPG maker map, characters on screen (on map), MC sprite on top - (diagonally split) - right side: butt groping, sprite of FMC and antagonist (depending on who speaks when) on top.
2. Start with map + sprites, go over to CG of the butt groping. put sprites on top when the important moments happen (he makes contact with the butt the first time, he goes deeper, etc. cause we need to see her reaction there).
3. start with map + sprites, go over to CG once he makes "contact". explain the subtleties and details. Then go back to sprites. from then on, have a (smaller window (square)) cut-in for whenever the groping escalates more or she shows a very sensitive reaction (like a battle cut-in for a special attack in a fight, just this time showing the butt and all that).
Some food for thought. All just ideas tho. I like 1 the most so far.
I disagree on OPs first point about the dialogue so far tho. I obviously will have to see more to be sure, but part of dialogue and scene-setting is also to ride home the important bits. Repetition is one way to do it. And in erotic scenes repetition (in moderation) can serve to emphasize aspects and reinforce effects. Obviously too much repetition is bad, but too little leaves you with a plain description of a scene and very short and aprupt dialogue and will leave the reader unsatisfied. You have to be able to find that middle ground and be a good tease. Repetition is part of that. But it is definitely not and should not be the only tool in your arsenal.