VN Ren'Py Our Red String [Ch.13.2 Beta] [Eva Kiss]

[dontcarewhateverno]

I just dislike the narrative setup that they are somehow more destined to be a pair than any other pairing options. I feel like the pitch of the red string tying those two together runs somewhat counterintuitively to what the point is of telling that story in a a choice-based game.

Ok. The following idea would NOT work in a sex-based game. But wouldn't it be interesting if they ended up together in the end in some profound way no matter what choices you make, but in very different circumstances, both good and bad, depending on those choices: Happy trad couple. Strung-out junkies. Murder/suicide. Mortal enemies. Heartless Manager/ Exploited Porn Star. Drunk Driver/Road Kill. Henpecked Husband/Rotten Wife. End could be heaven, hell or somewhere in between.

It would be the M Night Shayamalan of porn games, the name serving as an "I see dead people" foreshadow. But the destiny is there.

Yeah. I know there's no way in hell that will happen and it would piss everyone off royally but me. Just occurred to me cool possibilities for a twist that would tie in the game concept from a narrative standpoint. Maybe for another project.

 

[godoff95]

24 hrs to go?

 

[BlandChili]

Ok. The following idea would NOT work in a sex-based game. But wouldn't it be interesting if they ended up together in the end in some profound way no matter what choices you make, but in very different circumstances, both good and bad, depending on those choices: Happy trad couple. Strung-out junkies. Murder/suicide. Mortal enemies. Heartless Manager/ Exploited Porn Star. Drunk Driver/Road Kill. Henpecked Husband/Rotten Wife. End could be heaven, hell or somewhere in between.

It would be the M Night Shayamalan of porn games, the name serving as an "I see dead people" foreshadow. But the destiny is there.

Yeah. I know there's no way in hell that will happen and it would piss everyone off royally but me. Just occurred to me cool possibilities for a twist that would tie in the game concept from a narrative standpoint. Maybe for another project.

It's not the sex that makes the concept itself unworkable though, it's the emphasis on player-choice influencing the story of the game. It's one of Eva's central selling points.

Sure, that story could probably work fine in a non-game format, but in that case it wouldn't really include the player-choice aspect which is what people are here for. The only way I could really see the concept working would be with a groundhogday-esque setup as a TV-series, with a time pocket that repeats itself, and no matter what Lena does she always ends up marrying Ian. Then she'd inch closer to a solution each episode while slowly falling in love with him for realz.
That would change the tone of the whole thing though!

 

[dontcarewhateverno]

It's not the sex that makes the concept itself unworkable though, it's the emphasis on player-choice influencing the story of the game. It's one of Eva's central selling points.

Sure, that story could probably work fine in a non-game format, but in that case it wouldn't really include the player-choice aspect which is what people are here for. The only way I could really see the concept working would be with a groundhogday-esque setup as a TV-series, with a time pocket that repeats itself, and no matter what Lena does she always ends up marrying Ian. Then she'd inch closer to a solution each episode while slowly falling in love with him for realz.
That would change the tone of the whole thing though!

I don't know. I think it could work as an interactive choice-based fiction with strong themes running through it. More of a dark art game. Part of the structure would even leave a path open where they've never formally met, yet their interwoven existences have a profound effect on each other's fates regardless. A little like a cross between Run Lola Run and Alejandro Inarritu's Babel, but in game form, with a surreal Requiem For A Dream/Donnie Darko tone. (To clarify, of course, I'm not talking about ORS anymore. Just a game using an interconnection concept).

Your groundhog-day-esque idea could definitely work too, but with a very different tone and feel.

 

[Deleted member 3064965]

Thanks for an interesting discussion about Lena's more promiscous choices! I agree that she sometimes falls a bit too easily on the darker path. I did a quick promiscous Lena playtrough recently, and another scenario I noticed was her involvement with Mike. I generally like LenaxMike better than LenaxRobert, because Lena is the instigator, and in a way it's just as much Lena corrupting Mike as the other way round. However, in their second scene she's already obsessing about being fucked "in every hole" by Mike, and that annoying "hee hee" laughter is introduced. It kind of reverses the interesting power balance, and feels like a little too much too soon. In those scenes she's got several middle way dialogue options, though.

One of the promiscous Lena scenarios I think Eva's done a good job with, is Lena's fascination for Jeremy's cock. I can't remember ever seeing an interesting take on the BBC trope, because it almost always follows the same extremely basic pattern: 1) Woman sees cock. 2) Woman is shocked by the size of the cock, and the only thing she cares about is being fucked by that cock. The complete lack of context and other personal traits than "unable to resist big cocks" makes it just boring and uninteresting.

Overall, I'm still skeptical about Jeremy, and the blowjob scene isn't necessarily perfectly executed. But I'm still interested in their relationship, because Lena obviously is a more complex than the most women in BBC scenarios. Also, Lena's fascination for Jeremy has been given several chapters and scenes to develop, while their stories at the same time have been intertwined in several non sexual ways. In a narrative sense it's more like a character flaw for Lena than a classic, clichéd BBC obsession.

 

[Deleted member 3064965]

24 hrs to go?

She said that her goal was to have the Alpha ready by the end of the week, "probably Saturday". So still a bit of uncertainty, I would say.

 

[Cabot]

Judging from Lena's internal dialogue with Jeremy in the drinking game interactions if she's got the right fetishes, I think that misstep from GGGB is still there to some extent in ORS, unfortunately. Otherwise good Lena is thanking Ivy and happily dismissing Ian (if she likes him) in her thoughts during those actions. Internal-dialogue-wise, it's a complete 180 from how you've played her if not going the complete ho-bag route. Even just pulling down his pants to complete the dare. Eva does have a lot to tackle, but there should be some sort of middle-of-the-road dialogue in these situations with some push-pull in her thoughts (turned on but guilty, or reluctant but with necessity) for plausibility if she's otherwise made some ethical choices. As-is it's a complete immersion breaker.

I think you might be misremembering or misrepresenting that scene a bit. Even a Lena who has expressed BBC being her deepest sexual fantasy (and in order to be able to choose that she either has shown interest in Jeremy’s cock before or is already a bit of a size queen) will express doubts during that scene. For example: even with the fantasy and after choosing to take his pants off Lena’s inner monologue will say “I hesitated for an instant. Jeremy was Ian's friend, not to mention Louise's boyfriend…” UNLESS she’s also under the influence of drugs.

After that the player still has the option to quit the game a couple times (and different motives are given explicitly or through inner monologue) and when reaching the handjob point Lena still has the option to don’t do it -spending one will point if she has the fantasy- and again expressing her concerns then.

So, for the scene to develop as you painted it (and yes, it can indeed happen), with Lena “happily dismissing Ian” even when having feelings for him, Lena has to have lusted for Jeremy before, and confess her BBC fantasy, and be on drugs, and go full ahead with the game till the end ignoring all the middle ground wayouts. If not, at some point or another some degrre of reluctance and doubts will be displayed. But, if after several choices the player has made clear is all in about it, what room for reluctance is left?

I mean, after taking all those steps I'd say the player can’t expect Lena to be thinking about Ian (she does it the day after), or just being clearheaded, when he has guided her actions in the opposite direction all the time. With all respect, it looks like a “you have made your bed, now lie in it” scenario to me...

 

[mommysboiii]

why a game like this dont goes on onlyfans she would prob make huge money

 

[BlandChili]

One of the promiscous Lena scenarios I think Eva's done a good job with, is Lena's fascination for Jeremy's cock. I can't remember ever seeing an interesting take on the BBC trope, because it almost always follows the same extremely basic pattern: 1) Woman sees cock. 2) Woman is shocked by the size of the cock, and the only thing she cares about is being fucked by that cock. The complete lack of context and other personal traits than "unable to resist big cocks" makes it just boring and uninteresting.

Overall, I'm still skeptical about Jeremy, and the blowjob scene isn't necessarily perfectly executed. But I'm still interested in their relationship, because Lena obviously is a more complex than the most women in BBC scenarios. Also, Lena's fascination for Jeremy has been given several chapters and scenes to develop, while their stories at the same time have been intertwined in several non sexual ways. In a narrative sense it's more like a character flaw for Lena than a classic, clichéd BBC obsession.

One thing I remember from when I did go part-way with the Jeremy handjob scene was that I thought Lena's reaction was a bit too porn-esque.

In that playthrough I had specifically only desires women again, even masturbated without that beginning toy to get the Holly masturbation option, but Lena still gawks at the thing like a dumb fuck.

I think the choice to be into "big cock" that gets set if you spy on Louise/Jeremy and emphasis Jeremy's little Jerry would be more interesting if Lena's reaction when going along with the game (for winning purposes) was more neutered. Far from all women care about large cocks and it would be nice to reflect that in Lena, even when you aren't playing everything "lesbian enough" to avoid cock altogether.

 

[BlandChili]

why a game like this dont goes on onlyfans she would prob make huge money

Are there any examples of games development being situated through OF?

 

[lockerxx]

24 hrs to go?

Best case scenario.

 

[Blob]

why a game like this dont goes on onlyfans she would prob make huge money

Isn't onlyfans mostly for posting real life porn/nudes, things that aren't allowed on patreon?

 

[dundun]

 

[Deleted member 3064965]

One thing I remember from when I did go part-way with the Jeremy handjob scene was that I thought Lena's reaction was a bit too porn-esque.

In that playthrough I had specifically only desires women again, even masturbated without that beginning toy to get the Holly masturbation option, but Lena still gawks at the thing like a dumb fuck.

I think the choice to be into "big cock" that gets set if you spy on Louise/Jeremy and emphasis Jeremy's little Jerry would be more interesting if Lena's reaction when going along with the game (for winning purposes) was more neutered. Far from all women care about large cocks and it would be nice to reflect that in Lena, even when you aren't playing everything "lesbian enough" to avoid cock altogether.

Yeah, it's the premise that women are obsessed with big cocks that usually make those kind of porn movies/stories/whatever just silly. I'm struggling a bit to pinpoint the specifics of what I think makes LenaxJeremy different, though. I like the fact that none of them have made any advances towards each other before the scene at Ivy's, and that Jeremy seems more insecure with Lena than with other women. The slow burn evolution of their relationship contradicts the usual way those stories play out.

It's absolutely not the fascination for big cocks in itself that makes it interesting; it could just as well be some other physical trait she was obsessed with / intrigued by. It's rather the fact that despite that very specific starting point, Lena's attraction to Jeremy doesn't purely seem bland and one dimensional.

Also, the blowjob scene happens within a very specific context. It's an after party, Ivy is slowly directing the scene towards that moment, and they have the betting as an "excuse" to justify doing it. Her reaction is indeed a bit porn-esque, but it still doesn't feel completely over-the-top – for me, at least. In my other playthroughs I tell Louise about Jeremy and Ian, so I haven't played the scene with a less promiscous Lena, but I can imagine that it comes across as a bit less balanced in those scenarios.

 

[Firraxa]

So tomorrow will be the next update. 0.8/
Wow

 

[JustForPorn12]

Yeah, it's the premise that women are obsessed with big cocks that usually make those kind of porn movies/stories/whatever just silly. I'm struggling a bit to pinpoint the specifics of what I think makes LenaxJeremy different, though. I like the fact that none of them have made any advances towards each other before the scene at Ivy's, and that Jeremy seems more insecure with Lena than with other women. The slow burn evolution of their relationship contradicts the usual way those stories play out.

It's absolutely not the fascination for big cocks in itself that makes it interesting; it could just as well be some other physical trait she was obsessed with / intrigued by. It's rather the fact that despite that very specific starting point, Lena's attraction to Jeremy doesn't purely seem bland and one dimensional.

Also, the blowjob scene happens within a very specific context. It's an after party, Ivy is slowly directing the scene towards that moment, and they have the betting as an "excuse" to justify doing it. Her reaction is indeed a bit porn-esque, but it still doesn't feel completely over-the-top – for me, at least. In my other playthroughs I tell Louise about Jeremy and Ian, so I haven't played the scene with a less promiscous Lena, but I can imagine that it comes across as a bit less balanced in those scenarios.

I'd have to replay through it to recall exactly, but I'm fairly certain Lena's reaction to Jeremy's cock, assuming you don't choose any of the "fantasizing about bbc" options, is just a general suprise at the size, which I find kind of realistic, would probably have that reaction myself if some guy pulled a dick out bigger than my forearm.

Only complaint/change I'd really like for that scene, is some way for it to smack her in the face when she pulls it out, instead of her pulling away at the last second

 

[Moryaka26]

I think fight tournament will start in chapter 8 and will finish in chapter 9

 

[BlandChili]

Yeah, it's the premise that women are obsessed with big cocks that usually make those kind of porn movies/stories/whatever just silly.

Tbh it doesn't bother me to an extreme amount, at least not when there's alternative options presented for those who don't enjoy that tone of pornography. I have certainly known other women that were oddly explicit about their size-preferences for cocks. You'd be surprised at the foul ways women sometimes refer to male genetalia when they think they're in an agreeable crowd.

I'm struggling a bit to pinpoint the specifics of what I think makes LenaxJeremy different, though. I like the fact that none of them have made any advances towards each other before the scene at Ivy's, and that Jeremy seems more insecure with Lena than with other women. The slow burn evolution of their relationship contradicts the usual way those stories play out.

Certainly one thing that I've liked is that they aren't all over each other just for existing, like how Tyrone will act towards Ashley if you let him drive you home in gggb.

I am interested in the idea that Jeremy feels insecure about Lena because she's a different type to who he'd normally pursue? Ivy is promiscuous and outgoing while Louise wants attention. I was also interested in how utterly disinterested he seemed in regards to Holly, not even bothering to really get to know her name. Looking forward to seeing how that plays out further too.

 

[Archangells]

So tomorrow will be the next update. 0.8/
Wow

Very good :3

 

[mehGusta]

...I am interested in the idea that Jeremy feels insecure about Lena because she's a different type to who he'd normally pursue? Ivy is promiscuous and outgoing while Louise wants attention. I was also interested in how utterly disinterested he seemed in regards to Holly, not even bothering to really get to know her name. Looking forward to seeing how that plays out further too.

ooh, that's an interesting thought. having a love route for Lena Jeremy where she is the dominant one, and i don't mean bdsm style, i mean "who got the pants on in the relationship? it's gotta be Lena" style. like Jeremy still plays being a player, but only for his ego since he's head over heels for Lena. that i would like to see!