VN Ren'Py Our Red String [Ch.14.1.4 Beta] [Eva Kiss]

[Mrsubtle]

Agreed. I think POV shifts, in general, when used in VNs, just speak to bad/lazy writing. It's all about establishing a story's internal logic and structure. It works (at least from a technical if not workload standard) in ORS because two MCs were established and given equal time from the start. Once a writer establish a story's internal rules, they need to follow them or the narrative turns disjointed. It could be done, carefully and selectively, with a third MC, but there would need to be a strong reason, shown to the player and established in the writing, to break that internal structure. I haven't seen a VN do that well so far and I don't see any reason to do it here.

Wait what? Its a Visual Novel, Novels in general can follow different Pov's
So saying its lazy or bad writing doesn't compute. Heck Ren'py or it's style originates from the 90's and the limitation's of those technology's. Now we have more powerful systems to go in new directions and new ways of telling a story and to experiment with new things.

I get it's an accessible tool but god there is so much to critique Ren'py it self and some of its antiquated mechanics. But how Eva approaches this story Isn't one of them. Sure there are probably some challenges to overcome.

Also I prefer this approach against an overdose of exposition, which is usually bad or lazy writing.

At a certain point you gotta do new things and or set new standards.

 

[dontcarewhateverno]

Wait what? Its a Visual Novel, Novels in general can follow different Pov's
So saying its lazy or bad writing doesn't compute.

Not when it's done out of the blue halfway through the story. Absolutely no offense meant here, but I don't think you're very experienced in story structure. Or you only read a portion of my post. There is an internal logic created in the early chapters of any well-written story, whether a novel, a film or a VN. Sure, POVs can change even in a great novel, but that internal structure must be established near the start or otherwise must be justified and handled logically within the story. It takes a skilled writer to "break" their own story's rules correctly. Eva handled two MCs well in ORS by strongly establishing them both early on. Most VNs are written sloppily however, with inexperienced writers introducing POV changes lazily and sporadically 1/3+ of the way through their stories to conveniently handle exposition when the MC isn't present. It's like introducing a narrator halfway through a story who should have been established at the beginning. It just doesn't work.

 

[BlandChili]

Wait what? Its a Visual Novel, Novels in general can follow different Pov's

They can, but it's never done well IMO. Hell, I don't even think ORS has done it too well, even though it's a more graceful example compared to others. At least in ORS it's an understood integrated system and not a collection of spontaneous events.

So saying its lazy or bad writing doesn't compute. Heck Ren'py or it's style originates from the 90's and the limitation's of those technology's. Now we have more powerful systems to go in new directions and new ways of telling a story and to experiment with new things.

I'd perhaps not call it lazy writing myself, but I do think it's a crutch. When you have a tough time writing out the story from the perspectives that you have used so far, an easy fix is to shift the POV as to make use of motives that doesn't fit with the main character(s).

At a certain point you gotta do new things and or set new standards.

But POV shifts is not a new standard.

 

[Bom969]

Is there a path where in Lena accepts Robert as her boyfriend? I have tried multiple routes and everytime she asks him to be FWB. Is there an alternative path?

 

[BlandChili]

Is there a path where in Lena accepts Robert as her boyfriend? I have tried multiple routes and everytime she asks him to be FWB. Is there an alternative path?

I don't think so. Lena can't develop romantic interest in him it seems, at least so far.

 

[Mrsubtle]

Not when it's done out of the blue halfway through the story. Absolutely no offense meant here, but I don't think you're very experienced in story structure. Or you only read a portion of my post. There is an internal logic created in the early chapters of any well-written story, whether a novel, a film or a VN. Sure, POVs can change even in a great novel, but that internal structure must be established near the start or otherwise must be justified and handled logically within the story. It takes a skilled writer to "break" their own story's rules correctly. Eva handled two MCs well in ORS by strongly establishing them both early on. Most VNs are written sloppily however, with inexperienced writers introducing POV changes lazily and sporadically 1/3+ of the way through their stories to conveniently handle exposition when the MC isn't present. It's like introducing a narrator halfway through a story who should have been established at the beginning. It just doesn't work.

That I don't deny, plus Eva has re-written certain things as well that doesn't quite make sense.

BlandChili
As for Pov shifts not perhaps something new but you don't see it often, or they are usually exposition pieces.

Was generalizing a bit.

It's also been a while since I played ORS, things were a bit fuzzy for while and oddly enough I have mentioned somethings about it.
Guess Eva lacks still some experience with the writing it self. The premise is all good though, just needs the proper refinement.

As for Motives each characters have their own motives and goals, and IRL expectations and what ever else can be out of sync. Not necessary bad writing. But don't think Pov's are a crutch, sometimes the rest of the world needs to progress so that the Mc(s) can also move forward with their lives.

 

[ArcherHades46]

any news?

 

[Bishop Robert]

I want to be different.

The chances Lena sleeps with a homeless dude.?

 

[Dirtytreenaturd]

I want to be different.

The chances Lena sleeps with a homeless dude.?

Exactly lol. I just want to put Lena into situations where realistically she would never be in. Fun seeing Eva's creativity in having her justify doing depraved or disgusting things.

 

[soprano31]

i'm only playing this game for a woman,cindy,what a beauty!!if you can take her away from wade,you've got a treasure in the house.the rest?lena,full of problems(father's cancer,stalker axel,weinstein-esque seymour)allison,grumbles all the time about her life,work and her ex,cherry,(just for sex)emma,okay nice wild side,but nothing long term,holly,too timid,needs to be more assertive first,minerva,just hate sex,ivy,too vulgar,and then louise,if it came my way,good competitor for cindy,i'll tame her and keep her on a leash.but cindy,she is the beauty and perfection herself!!

 

[MaliPizdek]

Cindy is the best, fuck all the rest!

 

[Canto Forte]

That is the spirit - leave her to wade, the fox moony wannabe who only gets a girl if she dropped from the moon and fell flat on her face right next to him:/

 

[RoboticCatDogHybrid]

Chapter 10 in 2022 bros?!! or 2024...

 

[jimul18]

Chapter 10 in 2022 bros?!! or 2024...

There's no firm release date or window. EK hasn't worked this way since GGGB. There was the chance that Ian part would have been released in August but the Patrons voted against that. Based on that roughly 45-50% were done in late August and the remaster was released in late April (minus EK's vacation) were are looking at a late October-December release.

 

[Nickly]

Cindy gang

 

[Roderick2]

I really hope no one passed away.

 

[Garybaldi_the_Vile]

Does UnRen not work on this game?

 

[pavlogrk]

Chapter 10 in 2022 bros?!! or 2024...

nah bro chapter 10 will be released on December 2030 !!! the joke is old move on!

 

[Bishop Robert]

Exactly lol. I just want to put Lena into situations where realistically she would never be in. Fun seeing Eva's creativity in having her justify doing depraved or disgusting things.

It sucks all her current options are the generic "hot dude" its so boring.

Only scene of hers (Straight route wise) with any steam is the one with Jeremy and that recent modeling for Seymour (was that his name?).

Not to say her scenes are bad I just don't feel the same way about them like I did with the options in GGGB.

 

[Canto Forte]

Jeremy is the man whore of this game - the most generic overused oversaturated trope
of "the hottest dude" who makes all women's panties drop like fish from the sky -
who advertises it from the very first second to the very last scene in this game.
Once you called hot guys boring, how is it steamy if that was boring?