Pet Peeve: Too Many Handjob Scenes in Games

[megaplayboy10k]

Caveat: I am sure that there are folks with a HJ fetish, so just to be clear: I AM NOT KINK-SHAMING YOU.

This issue is indirectly alluded to in the Porn Tropes thread, but basically most games have the Stairway to Heaven routine--kiss, handjob, grope, blowjob, titfuck, vaginal sex, anal, maybe interspersed with footjob, buttcheek-humping, etc.
Here's my problem. IRL, nobody over the age of 25 is thrilled to get a handjob (in lieu of oral, sex, etc.). Because 1) they can probably do it better themselves and 2) they know it's a stalling tactic if the woman is offering it instead of something more satisfying and 3) most women also want to move forward more quickly than that. A teenage boy might be thrilled about his first handjob, but by the 9th or 10th he's chomping at the bit to move on. And yet, most games still have the handy as a necessary intermediate step before progressing to oral/vaginal/anal. It's basically the least satisfying form of sexual interaction that actually results in release. So, imo, I'd prefer if there were fewer hj scenes in games, or alternatively, if they more reliably progressed for tf/bj or even sex scenes in games. When I keep getting these scenes in games, I feel like, metaphorically speaking, the devs are jerking us off to keep us "satisfied", because they haven't finished the renders for the other sex scenes yet.

 

[inci]

i agree... except, as a story device they work in some "reluctant" situations....everynight yer aunt/boss/landlady/coffee barista squeezes you to release etc is dumb

 

[DownTheDrain]

Agreed.

Handjob scenes do nothing for me, not even animated ones.
Since the player isn't actually getting jerked off irl all they get is a closeup of the MC's dick and that's really low on my list of things I want to see. A nice render of the love interest in a seductive pose does more for my arousal.
Footjobs I can understand from a fetish perspective, but handjobs I skip whenever I don't need them for progression.

 

[OhWee]

If it makes you feel any better, I tend to focus on the vaginal and multiple partners a lot more in my crossover comic. I can't recall doing any handjobs so far for that (BJs/69s are included though). I think the only handjob I actually rendered, well she was straddling some guy too...

It's more of a happy ending BJ thing though. This is the closest I think I've come to setting up a handjob in my collection of renders. BTW, for those not in the know, the black creepydudes are magical, so the guy in the back has his legs disappearing into the floor (she is indeed being DPed as well).

I'm sure I'll set up a couple of HJs in Consent when I finally get around to that, but only as 'obligatory' stairway to heaven stuff, not because I want to, but most likely they will be BJs instead because I don't like pussyfooting around.

'Just' handjobs simply do not interest me personally. As I've told a couple of different ladies (and as you pointed out yourself), I can do my on HJs, and more effectively at that, I don't need them for that. I'd rather go down on them instead, I like making girls squirm when my face is buried between their thighs, that personally turns me on a lot more than a HJ will...

That and vaginal of course!

 

[Engelstein]

When she doesn't spit in her hand or on my cock before the handjob.

 

[DownTheDrain]

When she doesn't spit in her hand or on my cock before the handjob.

Most games have you go in dry for anal, so yeah...

 

[Engelstein]

Most games have you go in dry for anal, so yeah...

When the MC doesn't spit on the asshole or cock before anal.

 

[megaplayboy10k]

Most games have you go in dry for anal, so yeah...

Dry anal with a gigantic cock. Why not just perform surgery without anesthesia while you're at it?

 

[DownTheDrain]

Dry anal with a gigantic cock. Why not just perform surgery without anesthesia while you're at it?

Maybe sexually frustrated moms that want to hop on the horse dicks of their 18-yo-for-legal-reasons sons produce some kind of natural anal lubricant...

 

[polywog]

Someone once told me "never let your dog have sex, or he'll start humping everything and want it all the time" I was shocked that she could be so cruel. She said "as long as they don't know what they are missing, they don't want it, but once they start, they want it all the time" Assuming she wasn't a virgin, I replied "Is it the same for people?" "Do you want it all the time?" She blushed. I wasn't really interested in her, but this bitch needed to be taught a lesson on animal cruelty. So I turned on the charm, and had her eating out of my hand. Made her get down on all fours and beg, but I denied her... I asked "how would you like to be kept as a pet, and never allowed to have sex." "No" she pleaded. "If you're not going to take your dog to the park so he can get laid, the least you can do is give him a handjob, amirite?" "Yes" she said as she rolled on her back looking to get her belly rubbed"

 

[Engelstein]

That's pretty good tbh

 

[freedom.call]

Yeah, handjobs and blowjobs not followed by sex does nothing for me. In games there seems to be an order to things you have to do though, or else!

 

[megaplayboy10k]

Yeah, handjobs and blowjobs not followed by sex does nothing for me. In games there seems to be an order to things you have to do though, or else!

Blowjobs can be sexy AF, particularly triple blowjobs:

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[ILCjr]

If the HJ is foreplay, I am ok with it. But just to make it a "reward" or whatever really does not do anything for me.

 

[freedom.call]

particularly triple blowjobs

Tbh that has never happened to me. I meant in games though, it's a little different irl.

 

[Winterfire]

I was actually thinking of adding a handjob as first scene but decided against it because showing a cock and a hand did not feel much like a reward... Guess I dodged a bullet.

I still think a handjob scene would work in a non animated game: You could have an image split in two in which you show the woman in a provocative pose and hand/cock in the second image... Or simply the first one and describe the handjob gesture via text only.

Your valid point could easily be fixed to keep the "Stairway to heaven" by having someone interrupt the hot moment with the idea that the handjob had to be only the "starting point".

 

[baneini]

Boobjobs are equally lame, and armpit jobs, or back of the knee jobs, or using the girls hair to masturbate. Why would any man ask for those over masturbating themselves?
Dry anal is another one where the idea of anal being a hassle is ignored for cheap porno scene that is devoid of meaning.
Then theres scenes where anatomy is ignored in favor of cartoon physics, women have rubber bodies or no internal organs. "A dry horse penis in the ass? I don't see why not" t. most games with bestiality.

Penises that are the size of a baseball bat because the author was abused when he was 6y old and maintains the proportion of
daddys dick being larger than his wrist or the female alternative where the every woman has drooping tits are larger than their heads because thats what it looks like when a child looks at their mom. Those games are just a hard pass.

Public nudity being commonplace just means nudity doesn't mean sex, yet authors keep doing it.
Lesbians, magic futas, monsters/tentacles are undesirable. Need a normal human male mind in the scene somehow.
Animated scenes suck, I wish devs stopped doing them. 1 second loops are simply awful.

 

[megaplayboy10k]

Well, or at least a longer loop, or a string of loops that liven it up a bit. Change up the facial expressions, at least.

 

[polywog]

I agree with those of you who say handjob meh. In most games, that's all it is a meh handjob. But games are about fantasy. People share their story through a game, and if it's done right, the player can have that same experience from playing the game.

I was young when I got my first handy, so obviously I can't fully recreate the scene due to legal issues, but I can relay the core information using older models.

The scene takes you back to when you were a virgin, you hadn't yet had sex, and your girlfriend too was an inexperience virgin.
The awe and wonder in her eyes seeing her first cock up close, worshiping it, she immediately recognizes that this is something powerful, and she wishes that she had one. She touches it for the first time and she sees that through this magical wand she can wield power over you. The slightest movement of her hand makes you squirm and she can feel her power growing stronger minute by minute. You grow weaker and weaker as the succubus works her craft, you try and resist the spell she has on your shaft.
She grins ear to ear when you succumb.

 

[polywog]

If the HJ is foreplay, I am ok with it. But just to make it a "reward" or whatever really does not do anything for me.

They say that a woman knows weather she's going to sleep with you or not within 5 minutes of meeting you. But from my experience and observations there's a little more to it than that. For guys sex is pretty simple, but for girls it can get messy, and might require a shower or bath, or even mess up her hair. So if you meet a girl at a club, for example. If she hasn't ruled you out in 5 minutes that's a good sign, but it's no guarantee that you're gonna get lucky. She still has to weigh the pros and cons, and decide if you're worth messing her hair up or not. More experienced girls recognize a man when they see one, but younger girls will often take you in the restroom to be sure, before they go further. She sizes you up, and makes her final decision to sleep with you or not based on her findings. If that handjob, or blowjob was your only reward, at least you got something, she could have been a bitch about it. She can just fix her lipstick and try again. If she finds what she wants, instead of saying "I have to work early in the morning" she say's "I'm calling in sick tomorrow"