VN - Ren'Py - Abandoned - Solve the Riddle [Ch. 1.2 fixed] [Father Confessor]

Version reviewed: Chapter 1
A charismatic writer and publisher is entangled in some sort of conspiracy involving the city's elite and powerful.

Look, the renders and animations are really very nice. The women are beautiful and their outfits hot.

But the writing (despite an apparently detailed story) really lets this game down. Not sure if it's a translation issue, or just written by someone with really poor English skills, but it's so bad that it's painful to read, and I just can't make any sense of some of the scenes.

"Why are you grinning on me!"
"I have a bonner"
"Why important days are always tomorrow, when I'm not ready at all?"
"Take away the lyrics and name it as it is - the world of rough porn!"
"God you have got the boobs"
"I believe that people are the masters of there life's and everything that surrounding them, everything that build by there hands controlling by them only
Their isn't some hand of fate reaching down and controlling anything"

The writing is also just full of bizarre punctuation and disjointed sentences. The developer really needs to find a talented writer to bring the story-telling up to the level of their visuals.

I will be interested to come back to later versions, to see if this has improved. I hope so - the game has real potential.

Small edit: The dev has contacted me to say that the writing has been redone for the next version.

Only not so good thing is the inconsistent English, and the creative spelling, eg: (pronouns instead of pronounce), loses 1 star for that (4/5 stars). Get an English-First-Language supporter or friend to proof read it for you. The good: The story is great and shows a lot of promise, perhaps a little slow for those looking for a quick fap, not problem for me (5/5 stars), good renders and models (4/5 stars). Good music selection (4/5 stars). Good luck on your game Father Confessor

nice game (so far)

renders are very good
the story- well - writing could be better , but its interesting one
the mc is written as a hopeless horny one - thinking with his dick
(hope it will get a change)

seems there will be a big story behind all the plot - have to wait for

4 stars for now (may change later)

gl with your game Father Confessor

Interesting conspiracy plot might shape up to be a great story in the future

Great renders with new models and the animations are really top notch

Writing is not bad but could use improvements as well as a proofreader but these things can be fixed easily and will get better in the future if the devs stick to it
Another downside of this VN is the MC's character even though he is old enough he acts like an immature horny boy in most cases which makes it not fitting to the story and if devs are doing it for the sake of comedy in my opinion they are doing it wrong and the humors also could use some uplifts

Nice music adds a mystery vibe to the atmosphere

All in all great work in the art department but with improvements in writing no doubt it will properly exploit its potentials

Goodluck with the project.

- Interesting story
- Good choice of music
- Good renders
- Nice choice of women
- Good menu design (except the bad contrast of the forward/back arrows in the save dialog)
- Large download file for a first chapter (impressive!)

- Many inner monologues of the protagonist
- A few minor spelling mistakes

- Very good for a (seemingly) first work!
- Grade: between B and A