- Jun 28, 2017
- 2,010
- 3,122
Map design has issues, the path to fathers grave and to church is basically invisible and says "nothing here".
Body propotions are pretty amateurish.
The story has these kids fucking adults and text says they're malnourished adults which doesn't matter to patreon censors so might as well make the text and visuals tell the same thing.
Theres these instant anal scenes which dont make sense, try forcing a cucumber up your ass without lube and see how it goes. Some random plant/orphan rape scenes that aren't appealing since they're disconnected from narrative or mc's choices.
In general need to fill out the narrative more, make scenes less random, pace them better with some point system, make map easier to read and trace more for improved body proportions. Might be better to release patches of content that form a cohesive chapter with finished scenes and quests instead of "nothing here, wip, this scene is text only, this quest isn't done" even if the release schedule gets longer.
Body propotions are pretty amateurish.
The story has these kids fucking adults and text says they're malnourished adults which doesn't matter to patreon censors so might as well make the text and visuals tell the same thing.
Theres these instant anal scenes which dont make sense, try forcing a cucumber up your ass without lube and see how it goes. Some random plant/orphan rape scenes that aren't appealing since they're disconnected from narrative or mc's choices.
In general need to fill out the narrative more, make scenes less random, pace them better with some point system, make map easier to read and trace more for improved body proportions. Might be better to release patches of content that form a cohesive chapter with finished scenes and quests instead of "nothing here, wip, this scene is text only, this quest isn't done" even if the release schedule gets longer.