I like how you think.
The main problem that stops me from letting victims become aggressors is that that could cause FvM situations where the dominant party is the male, and I honestly don't like the idea. If I wanted to stop that from happening, it would be possible to make it so only female victims can get the upper hand on you, but that brings us to yet another problem; the victim models just don't have the assets to make holds look attractive. It'd be unthinkable for the victim to try to pull off a breast smother or, heck, even a facesit with how slim they are.
So, we've got 2 problems to solve, how do we handle FvM, and how do we make holds by the NPC models look good.
The only solution I see that could solve both problems is adding some attractive models with better bodies as NPCs (we'll call them aggressive NPCs) and make it so only aggressive NPCs can turn the tables on you once you get them in a hold (they could be Genshin girls for example). We could also have it so the aggressive NPCs can also initiate holds on the player.
To be able to implement this solution though, I'd need to find someone who has some Blender knowledge and is able to re-rig both the current aggressor girl models and the future aggressive NPC models to have the same rig as the current victim models. Without this, neither aggressors nor aggressive NPCs will be able to play the victim role in holds since the victim side of the hold animations won't be compatible with their rigs (bone structures).
If anybody who reads this has 3D model rigging/re-rigging knowledge and is willing to help, please send me a DM. I'm willing to pay for this as well since the alternative is looking for someone on Fiverr who can do it, which will probably end up costing quite a bit more.
Also, if anyone can find a better solution for these problems, I'm all ears.