But from both short term observation and from speaking to the writer, I actually think this might pull it off.
As I said, I genuinely think the game shows promise. Some of the character interactions definitely seemed interesting and original enough (as in, not seen before hundreds of times in other games) for me to provide feedback.
I think that Violet and the MC, in their scenes, are being portrayed competently as almost stumbling into a D/s dynamic. Neither of them knows totally what they want or what it would look like, so they're fumbling at it.
I thought it weren't the characters stumbling into discovering power-play mechanics, but the author him/herself.
If this can be argued for the protagonist, since we get to define her (and I definitely did not play her as naive or hesitating, delivering a well-earned slap to Matt the very instant he clumsily attempted something ridiculous on her), Violet is introduced as someone constantly competing in her upper-class family for status, and probably wanting to extend it to her school as well. While she could be a switch (I believe the potential is there for everyone, provided the right dominant) and as far as I understand it she is, nothing in her demeanour really showed it. In my mind, she reads more or less like a MCQ to me, that an inexperienced author presented to players to fill out, perhaps with the intention not to force anything on the player that they wouldn't wish.
There is nothing that points to Violet having a relationship with other students or the teaching staff, except some condescending thoughts that she only seems to share with the protagonist. There is nothing happening at school or in the city that shows that she is respected, feared, liked or maybe disliked.
All in all, I think that it makes Violet a very wish-washy character, that awaits player input to exist, which never leaves a memorable lasting impression, which is a shame, because it's the character I initially had the most interest in.
I also think the game seems to have a pretty decent understanding of the psychology of it from the initiated. Matt doesn't know how to channel being a Dom productively so he's kind of play acting at it. The MC doesn't know how to be a sub so she's following along out of interest but is kept at a distance by his failures.
I admit I haven't seen anything of Matt past the early rebuking and his subsequent disappearance in the class, which sums up to nothing at all.
This being said, I think that a mind/spineless bully as you describe him would make a very (very) poor Dom (or even sadist dominant). Mindless, because it's a poor copy/pasta from the thousands of other games which already host that trope : grope the protag at the first chance, then don't stop, thinking she would eventually drop into submission with an aheago face. Spineless, because there is nothing dominating or self-asserting in the demeanour of someone who has to be sneaky about it, minutes only after meeting the other character, not giving anyone the chance to enter a situation of power-play.
From what you tell me, there is nothing at all which inspires me to further look into that kind of relationship between the protagonist and himself either. Even if she was shy, timid, naive and whatever, even pure masochists surely have some standards. Someone who hesitates, stumbles and fails at every step of his life does not qualify to ever be a Dom.
The writing isn't always expert. The Violet confession scene needed a bit more finesse.
For sure. Beyond that, it is my belief that the author needs to reflect on where he wants to lead his characters, who he wants them to really be within the frame of the story of his game. Without wanting to sound offensive, some input of experienced smut authors might also help.
One doesn't wake up at 18/21 years with a blank sheet as personality like Violet. Matt ought to either have grown into a full-fledged despicable bully with a spine, inspiring terror to the whole class, or into something else than a walking laughing stock attempting pre-teen doctor-play antics on strangers.
I think that other characters were much more accomplished, like the bakery girl, the cheerleader captain or even the obvious cases of Olivia and Damien, so again all is not bad, far from it. The SMS game feature for example is fantastic, and would allow for so much more to happen, or to be introduced into a much smoother fashion.
But, I think it gets it down reasonably well. Better then most at least.
Gets down reasonably? Well, I don't know. I would say... promising, with some serious need for polishing for some of the characters. Better than most? Yes, but that is unfortunately not an achievement given the poor performance in average of other writers on this site.
I hope the author will not give up, and set him/herself a higher standard than that. I believe they can do it, and it definitely would be very refreshing.
