Warning for hidden phone users

Succubus Hunter

Devoted Member
May 19, 2020
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Safehope
If you're in an unsafe domestic situation and have a hidden secondary phone:
Wednesday, October 4th, FEMA is conducting a national test for emergency alerts. Your phone will get the alert anywhere from 2:20 pm (Eastern time) to 2:50 pm.
The sudden noise of this alert could disclose the location of your hidden device, so it's best to power it completely down during that time.
Stay safe.

warning-for-hidden-phone-users-v0-clvtr6eitzrb1.jpg
 

Nadekai

Well-Known Member
Aug 18, 2021
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Why would someone have second phone due to domestic violence? Sorry, I don't really get it.
 

Hagatagar

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Oct 11, 2019
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Why would someone have second phone due to domestic violence? Sorry, I don't really get it.
As a safety measure. The abusive spouse/partner might take the original phone away and that way there would be a backup.

What nation?
According to the listed time zones, the organizations at the bottom and that it's from FEMA, it's the USA. ;)
 
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blissfulberyl

New Member
Oct 5, 2023
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Thanks for the tip, OP.
Note that domestic violence doesn't just apply to spouses or partners, but all victims of violence in the household (such as children, seniors, dependents, etc.) Anyone can be a victim, not just couples.
 

Nadekai

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Aug 18, 2021
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As a safety measure. The abusive spouse/partner might take the original phone away and that way there would be a backup.


According to the listed time zones, the organizations at the bottom and that it's from FEMA, it's the USA. ;)
Ye... but why not just report ot divorce,etc etc said person?
 
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Hagatagar

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Oct 11, 2019
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Ye... but why not just report ot divorce,etc etc said person?
There are almost endless reasons why someone stays with an absusive partner.
Financial reasons, social pressure, family (children), security from outside factors and also mental insecurity/disorder or the fear of vengeance after a separation. Just to name a few.

That is why it is important that there are help/support systems for such situations.
 

omobo

Newbie
Aug 2, 2018
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335
can only hope the folks who needed to see this message got it, mental health overall is a fairly overlooked thing these days
 
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Nadekai

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Aug 18, 2021
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There are almost endless reasons why someone stays with an absusive partner.
Financial reasons, social pressure, family (children), security from outside factors and also mental insecurity/disorder or the fear of vengeance after a separation. Just to name a few.

That is why it is important that there are help/support systems for such situations.
Oh, I see... I never experienced such, nor do I even know anyone who experienced such (and went on their life with them).
I don't want sound rude or anything, but is this common in US?
 

Hagatagar

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Oct 11, 2019
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Oh, I see... I never experienced such, nor do I even know anyone who experienced such (and went on their life with them).
I don't want sound rude or anything, but is this common in US?
I am not from the US. And according to it's an all-too-common problem in the US, unfortunately.
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But this is not a problem unique to the US.
Every country has these problems, in some countries domestic violence is considered acceptable and many others it's kind of a taboo to speak about it and it's treated with shame.
Quite often, even close friends or family members never notice it and are shocked when they learn that it happend in their close environment.

That's why one should never assume that it's a rare occurrence in one's own country.
 
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Nadekai

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Aug 18, 2021
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I am not from the US. And according to it's an all-too-common problem in the US, unfortunately.
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But this is not a problem unique to the US.
Every country has these problems, in some countries domestic violence is considered acceptable and many others it's kind of a taboo to speak about it and it's treated with shame.
Quite often, even close friends or family members never notice it and are shocked when they learn that it happend in their close environment.

That's why one should never assume that it's a rare occurrence in one's own country.
I didn't mean that it's exclusive to US, but it not getting solved.
Thanks for the info tho.
 

Succubus Hunter

Devoted Member
May 19, 2020
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As a safety measure. The abusive spouse/partner might take the original phone away and that way there would be a backup.


According to the listed time zones, the organizations at the bottom and that it's from FEMA, it's the USA. ;)
100 percent this on both counts.
 

Count Morado

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Jan 21, 2022
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Anyone with sense would have used the money for a bus, train, or coach fare to flee.
Not necessarily. As Hagatagar has already stated...
There are almost endless reasons why someone stays with an absusive partner.
Financial reasons, social pressure, family (children), security from outside factors and also mental insecurity/disorder or the fear of vengeance after a separation. Just to name a few.
Not having the money to flee is actually one of the least likely reasons. Not having a safe place to flee to is much more likely. Losing one's children is another huge one. There are also many psychological schemas, attachment disorders, etc that are greater factors.
 

Count Morado

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That may be true, for some people.

You take the kids with you to the refuge where I live, so that's ruled out. They have refuges for women and their kids.
In the country where I live (a G8 country), almost all the refuges for single adults or parents with children are full, backlogged, and those with space available are usually not conveniently located for the people needing them or won't offer support because the person fleeing has some kind of criminal record in their past which the organization doesn't empathize with (including simple drug possession).
I hate to say it, but some women are just stupid. :coffee:
Blaming the victim is never the answer. Also, while women are - by far - the vast majority of victims of abuse, men are also victims and they are stuck in a situation where not only are they abused but if they were to share that they are a victim they then get accusations of "not being a real man."

Again, living with abuse is a lot more complicated than simply a financial concern.
 

Succubus Hunter

Devoted Member
May 19, 2020
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That may be true, for some people.

You take the kids with you to the refuge where I live, so that's ruled out. They have refuges for women and their kids.

Financial reasons depend on where you live. Where I live, they would help someone in the long-run escape abusive relationships. I know someone who was already helped out of an abusive situation.

But the idiot, after being moved, she told the man where she was, and it started again.

I hate to say it, but some women are just stupid. :coffee:
It's not a matter of being "Stupid", it's a multitude of factors both internal and external that keep a person trapped. Not only that but it often takes several attempts to leave before breaking out of an abuser's orbit for good.

In the country where I live (a G8 country), almost all the refuges for single adults or parents with children are full, backlogged, and those with space available are usually not conveniently located for the people needing them or won't offer support because the person fleeing has some kind of criminal record in their past which the organization doesn't empathize with (including simple drug possession).Blaming the victim is never the answer. Also, while women are - by far - the vast majority of victims of abuse, men are also victims and they are stuck in a situation where not only are they abused but if they were to share that they are a victim they then get accusations of "not being a real man."

Again, living with abuse is a lot more complicated than simply a financial concern.
Thank you for sharing facts about how these situations actually work.

I do have doubts on the "Lower" male statistics given the reporting bias and possibility of retaliatory allegations.
 

anne O'nymous

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I didn't mean that it's exclusive to US, but it not getting solved.
It's, alas, difficult to solve something against the victim will.

I'm sure that in all countries you can easily find cops with such stories.
"I can't leave him, he would find me and kill me this time", "what would my family think", "the children, you thought about our children ? They need a father", "it's not with my poor salary that I would be able to raise the kids", "divorce is against my religion", and so on.
Of course, most of the time you can find rational arguments to counter the reason gave to not leave him. But it's not a rational situation.
It's a relationship that started with love, and the victim is generally still blinded by what rest of this love she had for him. The reason they give to explain that they stay are generally her way to not face the fact that they've been abused (not physically) and fell in love for someone who never deserved it. And when they face that fact, they usually do it, at first, the wrong way, believing that they were stupid and that all this is their fault ; what isn't at all the case.
And, as I said, for some it's a pure question of money. What is better ? Living with someone who, too often, is violent with you, or living on the streets surrounded by strangers that you imagine ready to violently rape you anytime they want ? When there's kids it's worse, because as a mother you want the best possible education for them, something they can have thanks to their father job, and would not have even if their mother had the chance to found a second job.

So, yeah, staying with your abuser, while taking some precaution like a hidden phone, is, alas, not something exceptional...