I don't think there's much question that pornography in general has a gradual desensitization effect. And not just on viewers; I was watching an interview with the adult film star Elena Koshka (certainly the most beautiful woman to ever do adult films), and she said that she couldn't even tell her friends what kind of porn she watched anymore, because she'd become so jaded that she was watching really extreme stuff. Which is especially interesting considering she doesn't shoot that kind of material.
For me, though, it wasn't and couldn't ever be a game. When I realize that content in a game is too much for me — an awful lot of the rather relentless rape in Japanese games is my particular trigger, but there are others — I just nope my way out of it and play something else. Unlike porn, games are too much of a time commitment to waste on something I'm going to hate. But I do remember the moment w/r/t pornography in general. It was a Legal Porno scene, which (if you know the studio) featured extreme penetrations like double anal and such. It's generally awful and passionless stuff, but every once in a while they have an actress who's into what they do and the scene works. So, this scene was with an actress named Kira Noir, who's a real-life submissive and an honest-to-god pain slut and can handle some shit. Her first scene with the studio was tremendous, and so I was eager to see her second. But in her second it was clear she was absolutely miserable and in pain (not the good kind) about five minutes after the actors joined her. I looked at the remaining time and there was about an hour left to go...which means that she was probably there for another two or three hours in order to assemble the finished scene. And I realized that I just couldn't support that sort of thing anymore, because it was making me sick.
That was the last Legal Porno video I watched, and at that point my tastes fundamentally and forever changed. If I don't believe the woman is enjoying herself — and yes, there's no way for a viewer to know for sure, but I think I've gotten reasonably good at separating acting from potential reality; focusing on specific actresses helps, as well — I can't watch the scene anymore. The same is true for games. I absolutely care if they're smart or dumb games, but I can "enjoy" a dumb game as long as the female NPCs are fully into the sex. If I never see another game with midnight rape (especially as a stat builder) again it'll be too soon. I've grown completely fatigued with corrupt-the-virgin games; I'm perfectly fine with a virgin headed down the path of corruption, but I'd greatly prefer it to be her idea. And rape-her-until-she-likes-it games? Fuck no.
