Really disappointed in the story. It is OK, but very disjoined.
- Different arcs for the various girls should have better cohesion.
- IRL a small campus like this the rumor mill about who the MC is fucking would be well discussed and Lauren wouldn't be oblivious.
- After Riley briefly questioned MC about his relationships with Lauren, it was dropped never to be discussed again.
- The whole Emily scenario doesn't add any value. Either he's a simp who can't get over her or he's an ass that holds her cheating against her. One or the other makes sense - not flip flopping to both.
- Fight Club story line is ridiculous.
- If the girls don't like the fighting, they shouldn't ignore it - it should be a friction point for the MC.
- If the girls think the fighting is a turn on, they should be focusing on MC fight skills not his personality.
- Chloe is a half formed character. Make up your mind. Is she a manipulative bitch or an oversensitive patsy. And follow on with rumors, stories, interactions that prove one or the other.
- She can have different interactions based on the MC or the NPCs, but make it viable.
- Artwork continuity is broken
- goes to bed clothed, wakes up in his underwear
- clothes disappear without story in some of the sex scenes