Yeah, i mean even so shy and submissive Robin with low confidence stat can be active. Also PC can move penis to ass/pussy which is even more dominant than just encouraging/asking for a blowjobThat is just because DoL was originally intended to be a submissive wet dream simulator, and so actions like being active or dominant like that were never really considered. It's just something that wasn't in the design plans.
But if recent updates are any indication, it seems that Vrelnir is slowly adding more and more options for "defiant" PC's or making the PC more of an active participant in encounters, giving more options like that for the consensual sex with the love interests, so maybe your suggestions may not be too far off.