PandaSuky

Member
Jul 25, 2019
295
175
Wow this dev is one of the most amazing devs i ever saw, he got the fans opinion to consideration. He had a great story in mind just had some holes in the game story and stuff but he fix it with the help of some tips, keep the good work man. I wish i could support you. For a first time doing a game is pretty cool and hearing your fans is a good thing so you can improve, but dont forget its your game so do what you like ;) , i know you are trying to make your fans happy, but dont forget what makes you happy doing the story.


PS: just dont put NTR in future game updates please ahahaha :KEK:
 

BlasKyau

Devoted Member
Jun 26, 2018
8,447
11,478
Were you able to have sex with Ava?
When the game gives the option I choose the other one, not to take advantage of the situation, so I'm not sure, but it doesn't say anything about that route not being finished, so I guess it will work.
 

ronniq_390

Newbie
Mar 15, 2021
59
40
When the game gives the option I choose the other one, not to take advantage of the situation, so I'm not sure, but it doesn't say anything about that route not being finished, so I guess it will work.
Gotcha. Might as well run thru the game again.
 
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LazyBloodlines

Member
Uploader
Game Developer
Sep 16, 2020
232
2,608
At first look, I was thinking it would be "The Headmaster" that came to the dark side, considering violence, gangs and other themes. Well, it's hard to judge for now, too many things yet to implement. The writing is decent, there are a few typos here and there, even though they didn't bother me much, but I thought it should be mentioned to fix them eventually. Without enough events and activity in the headmaster's office, it's a bit boring compared to linear story what appear from time to time. Will see how it plays out in the future updates, hope it will provide better experience. I also would like to see a choice between bad and good actions more morally complex. More gray choices where is no obvious evil or good sides of conflict.

For now the game mostly lean to building a wide harem of various girls, not that is a bad thing, just I prefer it more when girls are hard to achieve and when not all of them okay with sharing. But, I can let it slide, because, so far, I intrigued about where the things will go. And I like the darker side of this game and that the hero not that simple and has its own baggage of problems to deal with. The fact that the main character is essentially struggling with himself is an interesting concept, that we not see that often, and that's why it is very intriguing. I would even like to add one suggestion from myself, it might sound rough, since is literally came to my mind after playthrough, but maybe you find this concept worthy. At the moment, our hero is a natural badass, and it seems unlikely that he will find serious obstacles in the future. It would be an interesting solution to make his only powerful enemy his alternate ego, which would want to take complete control over his body. It might happen after serious fuck up from the MC side, so alter ego would come to conclusion that, they will die soon if he continues to be in charge. You could make it so that his alter ego starts deceiving him at first, and while we - players, probably could figure it out, the MC shouldn't (at least there shouldn't be always an option to choose) since he is already deep in this mental issues. Next he can start openly blackmail, if MC will decline his suggestion or ignore him for too long, his alter ego could take control over the MC body, for a short period of time, and do some nasty things with girls, or he can refuse to help us in some difficult situation (which won't end nice) that will require his fighting skills or devious mind.
The MC will need either start taking pills (he can steal them), and get rid of any dark influence, but also lose any help from him, until he stops taking them, or earn favors, agreeing with alter ego proposals, and spend them to make decisions that he don't like. As result of this idea, the decisions won't be that simple: choose a route, which you want to go - bad/good. Because you will need to take into consideration what your alter ego want, as well.

At this point I think that's all, let's see what will be in the next updates.
I don't wanna spoil anything, but you got a lot of things right. Many of what you said I actually had planned for the game already, especially about the MC and his internal struggles, and the way it's gonna be different for those who want to embrace the "dark" side of the story and those who want to struggle against it, and hope for a better future. I do like the way you describe things!


So far I mostly like what I've seen with this. My biggest issue is with the daily sandbox element where the way to avoid clicking on options that don't do anything is to talk to my other self who then tells me which option to choose, which still seems like unnecessary clicking. It would be preferred to either have the other self just automatically suggest the next action at the point of reaching the sandbox choice screen, or take the whole element away as more VN style offering only the options that advance the story line, and doing something like having a laptop to click on to check grades, finances, or upgrade the school.

So far, that's not too bad, but it just irritates me to perform an action. Check what my other self says to do next. Perform next action, when it would be so much easier to just be able to do what comes next, either by being told up front, or having options be more limited.

The more linear story parts were enjoyable. I'm surprised how immersed I actually was in the actual plotline unfolding, and found that to be the most enjoyable part so far.

I like the idea that Sophia and Ava might be quite a bit into each other. I definitely would like to see more of those two getting closer, and I mean as an actual relationship, not just sex.

So far I like Ashley, Asuka, and Ava most.

Minor error I noticed was in a part where it said something like, "his trust on you increased." I forget who it was specifically, but it really should read that his trust IN you or trust FOR you or trust TOWARDS you increased. ON just doesn't really work in English. Not a big deal, but a little awkward.

I was a little bummed out to reach the end. More please.
Yeah, being a first-time developer, the beginning of the game had A LOT to do with figuring out what works and what does not. There was A LOT of testing on the game mechanics and A LOT of feedback helped me to figure out things like "Hey, that's great! You should continue doing this!", and "Hmm, that's interesting, but it's not so funny, perhaps if you add this...", and finally "This shouldn't be in a game at all. It's just annoying."

I mean. I like to hear good feedback, bad feedback, anything really. I can find useful information anywhere. And if I can't, then there's no point in breaking a sweat for it. Whenever it's just utterly hateful rubbish, then I just choose not to be a part of it and move on.

And I do intend the sandbox elements to add to the story instead of it being just a grinding element to make the game longer. I intend to make every interaction with the girls inside the school have a different scene that will advance their stories, instead of grinding relationship points. It's pretty ambitious and a lot of work, but I think I'm figuring it out.

At first, I had to present the girls and the different places around the school, and the only way I thought about making this right is kinda having a linear path that directs/helps the player through it. And the hint system was a nice suggestion from the feedback.

I do want to change a few things in the early in-game days, but I'm so into the story right now that I'd just wish to add more content rather than spending the update time making small tweaks and breaking the current workflow. But I do want to review a few things later.

By the way, thanks for the typo call, I fixed it! :p

And thanks! I really appreciate it!


Hey Dev!
I didnt play this game, (for now) but read a comments, and very suprise how u know handle this, and give a feedback all people.
Congratulations to you, and all respect.
I try this game and we see.
Oh, +1 :
" I'm sorry. I'm from a literal culture." - Oh fuckin Yeah! Me too, in my language. this is rare gem these days. :) GL
Nice! Where are you from? (If you don't mind me asking.)
And thanks! I appreciate it! :D



I have deleted my comment because I did not want to discourage the developer.

I will only say as constructive criticism, that if you are going to make a "realistic" game, try to make the situations realistic, otherwise the immersion of the player disappears completely.
That's the only thing you find weird in the game?
The whole brain surgery episode was on the whole level above that.:ROFLMAO:
He was carrying her like a sack of potatoes, knowing what kind of trauma she could have, it's just a super level of plot armor that she survived that. More than that, in one scene there was like a bunch of people in the train, after a few punches to the bad guy, he's returning to the train, and it's empty. The train station also empty, and the street (which wasn't showed, but obviously he needed to bring her to his car or to his home) and of course there are no cameras.

Also, about that scene with the couple, there were like 4 thugs and one of them even carried a gun which, he obviously wouldn't be afraid to use, and the MC called that guy a pussy? Seriously? The boyfriend was like a student, I think? How the MC imagined him defend his girl? Turn Rambo mod, try to punch one of them and immediately die in process? After the MC returned with girl, the author, of course, showed us the weird reaction from the guy, to show him spineless, so we won't be pity him after we get our way with his girl. I don't really like this porn game trope, when all the other male characters dating girls are always the bad guys, from whom the player won't have the shame to steal the girl. Honestly, considering the dark theme of this game, I would prefer if this scene was reworked, and the guy could be shown not as pathetic, but as a regular person, that tried to distract thugs from his girl (like he could be screaming for help while command her to run), but failed anyway and so after the MC rescued them, he could start making plans to steal his girl or leave them alone.

But I can close my eyes on these things, for now I'm fine with the writing in other scenes. I'm also curious where the things will go. Maybe if such situations become the norm for this game, I will drop it, but for now I'm staying. Plus there are not that many games with dark themes, and MC who have deep inner problems with his head, I'm interested to see how he will get out of different situations with such problems.
It's really alright! Don't worry about demotivating me. As I said earlier: I do want to change a few things in the early in-game days, but I'm so into the story right now that I wish to add more content rather than spending the time I've got to work on the game, making small tweaks and breaking the current workflow, which is making me feel good about the story right now. But I do want to review a few things later.

You're right, the brain surgery thing was a bit unorthodox :p
It could be better executed, OF COURSE! But the whole setting is exactly what I wanted for the scene. Someone got hurt because of HIS problems. And even if he was not the one who caused the girl harm, the MC feels guilty about it and tries to help her in the only way he knows how. He's not used to going to the hospital, or the police, or anything circling the conventional means. So he brings her home, and he himself takes care of her while showing he's actually skilled in anatomy (which has a purpose later on). It also adds to his internal struggles like "Hey, I've done a lot of shit. But perhaps I can use some of what I've learned for some good, after all."
As I've said, it could be better executed, but the core of the scene itself is what I wanted.

Same thing with Kayle. Let's break this scene into parts. It's alright if you don't agree with everything I say, but perhaps I can give you a different view.
The gun thing. It was not known there was a gun until things got physical. At that point, it's not known to the player if kayle's boyfriend knew about the gun. But what we know is that he's surrounded by 4 dudes bigger than him. Most people would freeze in such a situation. I'm not saying my view is the MC's view. But to the MC, who's used to life-threatening situations, and it's also used to overcoming them, he was being a pussy. It's normal for people to not react rationally in situations of stress. And the MC was pissed he left the girl alone. And of course, I see no other scenario where the kid would not end up dead had he confronted the thugs.
And I do not know exactly how people are with guns around the world. I know different cultures and social-economic situations may change their behaviors around guns. There are a lot of real places where hearing gunshots is normal. But let's just say that, in the city where the game is set, a gunshot in the street would bring A LOT OF HEAT to everyone. It would be investigated, the surroundings would be swarmed with cops, and they would most likely end all in jail or dead. So it's more used as an intimidation thing rather than a weapon itself. And when he sees someone in the street calling the police, he decides it's better to just bail and de-escalate the situation.

And what a normal person would do? "This girl was harassed? The right thing to do would be to call the cops, get her to the hospital in case she freaks out and hurts herself, or something along these lines."
But the MC is not a normal person and is still learning how to behave in a normal society. He brings the girl to an abandoned place outside of any gang's territory because in his mind that's a safe place to be. Not in a police station, not in a hospital. Just away from everything. Kayle follows him because she's in shock, and people don't make sense when they're in shock. And when her boyfriend is mentioned she kinda breaks from it and starts freaking out.

I'm sorry about the long message, I'm really passionate about the game. :p

But I do agree that better execution is needed. I still got a lot to learn in terms of storytelling, rendering, and even coding. But I think I'm improving over time. :p

And I hope you guys enjoy it! :D

Edit: Oh shit, forgot to say.

There's also why this whole scene exists in the first place. From the narrative perspective, it's supposed to show his internal struggles. When he's thrown into a violent situation, the MC's persona changes, and usually the "dark side" of him takes control. The second time this happens is in the subway, and it doesn't happen right away because he's struggling since the encounter in the building where the "Evil MC" takes control without his permission.
In Kayle's scene, the evil MC serves as a part of the MC telling him "man, what the hell were you thinking? I know you wanted to help the girl, but you've fucked up. BADLY. You can't keep doing shit like this. You put yourself in danger for nothing." etcetera. etcetera
Then there's Ava's scene. Where she's hurt and the MC "kinda" learned from his mistakes. He's not taking her to somewhere abandoned. He gets her home because it's the safest place he thinks there is. And of course, the evil MC also scolds him for acting recklessly in this "pursuit" of redemption. In my opinion, it just adds to the overall setting of the game. Most of the MC's decisions aren't ENTIRELY rational because the guy is struggling with his mental challenges. But his decisions do serve their purposes in the story.



Wow this dev is one of the most amazing devs i ever saw, he got the fans opinion to consideration. He had a great story in mind just had some holes in the game story and stuff but he fix it with the help of some tips, keep the good work man. I wish i could support you. For a first time doing a game is pretty cool and hearing your fans is a good thing so you can improve, but dont forget its your game so do what you like ;) , i know you are trying to make your fans happy, but dont forget what makes you happy doing the story.


PS: just dont put NTR in future game updates please ahahaha :KEK:
Heey! Thanks! I really appreciate it, man! :D


Soooooooo - the blackmail scenes with Ashley are blocked rn? Ditto with the Ava sex scene(s)?
I don't follow those routes, but I would say they aren't blocked.
Were you able to have sex with Ava?
I mean... Perhaps you used UnRen? If that's so, you can see there are a few renders/videos of a few scenes with Ashley and Ava. They're not in the game because I was testing a few things. They are not meant for the player to see, because it's an unfinished product really. Even Ava's scene I think about deleting it completely. Now I imagine her first NSFW scene entirely different.

But there's nothing blocked or unfinished in both routes right now.
 
Last edited:

BlasKyau

Devoted Member
Jun 26, 2018
8,447
11,478
I mean... Perhaps you used UnRen? If that's so, you can see there are a few renders/videos of a few scenes with Ashley and Ava. They're not in the game because I was testing a few things. They are not meant for the player to see, because it's an unfinished product really. Even Ava's scene I think about deleting it completely. Now I imagine her first NSFW scene entirely different.

But there's nothing blocked or unfinished in both routes right now.
I only assumed that if the route was complete at that point, you would see the corresponding scene (and the truth is that since I only followed one of the routes, I couldn't tell if the other had a sex scene or not)
 
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ronniq_390

Newbie
Mar 15, 2021
59
40
I don't wanna spoil anything, but you got a lot of things right. Many of what you said I actually had planned for the game already, especially about the MC and his internal struggles, and the way it's gonna be different for those who want to embrace the "dark" side of the story and those who want to struggle against it, and hope for a better future. I do like the way you describe things!



Yeah, being a first-time developer, the beginning of the game had A LOT to do with figuring out what works and what does not. There was A LOT of testing on the game mechanics and A LOT of feedback helped me to figure out things like "Hey, that's great! You should continue doing this!", and "Hmm, that's interesting, but it's not so funny, perhaps if you add this...", and finally "This shouldn't be in a game at all. It's just annoying."

I mean. I like to hear good feedback, bad feedback, anything really. I can find useful information anywhere. And if I can't, then there's no point in breaking a sweat for it. Whenever it's just utterly hateful rubbish, then I just choose not to be a part of it and move on.

And I do intend the sandbox elements to add to the story instead of it being just a grinding element to make the game longer. I intend to make every interaction with the girls inside the school have a different scene that will advance their stories, instead of grinding relationship points. It's pretty ambitious and a lot of work, but I think I'm figuring it out.

At first, I had to present the girls and the different places around the school, and the only way I thought about making this right is kinda having a linear path that directs/helps the player through it. And the hint system was a nice suggestion from the feedback.

I do want to change a few things in the early in-game days, but I'm so into the story right now that I'd just wish to add more content rather than spending the update time making small tweaks and breaking the current workflow. But I do want to review a few things later.

By the way, thanks for the typo call, I fixed it! :p

And thanks! I really appreciate it!



Nice! Where are you from? (If you don't mind me asking.)
And thanks! I appreciate it! :D





It's really alright! Don't worry about demotivating me. As I said earlier: I do want to change a few things in the early in-game days, but I'm so into the story right now that I wish to add more content rather than spending the time I've got to work on the game, making small tweaks and breaking the current workflow, which is making me feel good about the story right now. But I do want to review a few things later.

You're right, the brain surgery thing was a bit unorthodox :p
It could be better executed, OF COURSE! But the whole setting is exactly what I wanted for the scene. Someone got hurt because of HIS problems. And even if he was not the one who caused the girl harm, the MC feels guilty about it and tries to help her in the only way he knows how. He's not used to going to the hospital, or the police, or anything circling the conventional means. So he brings her home, and he himself takes care of her while showing he's actually skilled in anatomy (which has a purpose later on). It also adds to his internal struggles like "Hey, I've done a lot of shit. But perhaps I can use some of what I've learned for some good, after all."
As I've said, it could be better executed, but the core of the scene itself is what I wanted.

Same thing with Kayle. Let's break this scene into parts. It's alright if you don't agree with everything I say, but perhaps I can give you a different view.
The gun thing. It was not known there was a gun until things got physical. At that point, it's not known to the player if kayle's boyfriend knew about the gun. But what we know is that he's surrounded by 4 dudes bigger than him. Most people would freeze in such a situation. I'm not saying my view is the MC's view. But to the MC, who's used to life-threatening situations, and it's also used to overcoming them, he was being a pussy. It's normal for people to not react rationally in situations of stress. And the MC was pissed he left the girl alone. And of course, I see no other scenario where the kid would not end up dead had he confronted the thugs.
And I do not know exactly how people are with guns around the world. I know different cultures and social-economic situations may change their behaviors around guns. There are a lot of real places where hearing gunshots is normal. But let's just say that, in the city where the game is set, a gunshot in the street would bring A LOT OF HEAT to everyone. It would be investigated, the surroundings would be swarmed with cops, and they would most likely end all in jail or dead. So it's more used as an intimidation thing rather than a weapon itself. And when he sees someone in the street calling the police, he decides it's better to just bail and de-escalate the situation.

And what a normal person would do? "This girl was harassed? The right thing to do would be to call the cops, get her to the hospital in case she freaks out and hurts herself, or something along these lines."
But the MC is not a normal person and is still learning how to behave in a normal society. He brings the girl to an abandoned place outside of any gang's territory because in his mind that's a safe place to be. Not in a police station, not in a hospital. Just away from everything. Kayle follows him because she's in shock, and people don't make sense when they're in shock. And when her boyfriend is mentioned she kinda breaks from it and starts freaking out.

I'm sorry about the long message, I'm really passionate about the game. :p

But I do agree that better execution is needed. I still got a lot to learn in terms of storytelling, rendering, and even coding. But I think I'm improving over time. :p

And I hope you guys enjoy it! :D

Edit: Oh shit, forgot to say.

There's also why this whole scene exists in the first place. From the narrative perspective, it's supposed to show his internal struggles. When he's thrown into a violent situation, the MC's persona changes, and usually the "dark side" of him takes control. The second time this happens is in the subway, and it doesn't happen right away because he's struggling since the encounter in the building where the "Evil MC" takes control without his permission.
In Kayle's scene, the evil MC serves as a part of the MC telling him "man, what the hell were you thinking? I know you wanted to help the girl, but you've fucked up. BADLY. You can't keep doing shit like this. You put yourself in danger for nothing." etcetera. etcetera
Then there's Ava's scene. Where she's hurt and the MC "kinda" learned from his mistakes. He's not taking her to somewhere abandoned. He gets her home because it's the safest place he thinks there is. And of course, the evil MC also scolds him for acting recklessly in this "pursuit" of redemption. In my opinion, it just adds to the overall setting of the game. Most of the MC's decisions aren't ENTIRELY rational because the guy is struggling with his mental challenges. But his decisions do serve their purposes in the story.




Heey! Thanks! I really appreciate it, man! :D





I mean... Perhaps you used UnRen? If that's so, you can see there are a few renders/videos of a few scenes with Ashley and Ava. They're not in the game because I was testing a few things. They are not meant for the player to see, because it's an unfinished product really. Even Ava's scene I think about deleting it completely. Now I imagine her first NSFW scene entirely different.

But there's nothing blocked or unfinished in both routes right now.
Ah got it. I just used unRen to poke around a bit. I like the progression with the character rn and the internal struggles of the MC a lot.
 
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dragneelx99

New Member
Dec 25, 2017
3
1
I won't do a "testament" of a comment.
Just pls make a route for happy ending with sophia, like settling down after everything and living peacefully with her. She is way too sweet and caring, that bathroom scene pained me that she was so worried about MC and it seemed like MC didn't give a fuck.

So far, really nice, im looking for good characters more that realistic story like above. Good luck with upcoming updates.
 

Larry2000

Dev/Head Writer of Unexpected Opportunity
Game Developer
May 9, 2017
1,386
3,281
She is way too sweet and caring, that bathroom scene pained me that she was so worried about MC and it seemed like MC didn't give a fuck.
Umm, I think you might have misread the scene. The MC wasn't cold to her at all! She was worried about him, that's true, but MC was also worried about Ava's reaction to his outburst of violence. Also, did you forget that MC kissed Sophia on the forehead? That's the most loving gesture ANYONE can give a loved one. At least in my opinion. I actually read your message and thought "Maybe it's possible" then I loaded up the scene and I think you may have misread the scene. It's like Sophia is trying to take MC away from his funk about Ava and is trying to make him feel better. MC is VERY nice under the circumstances as well.
 

RexGenocide

Member
Aug 11, 2017
243
396
The game has room for improvement but ilike it so far. Transparent textbox is a first thing i wish to see in the next update.
 

BeenThroughHell

Active Member
Sep 10, 2020
957
454
wtf is going on. i already download it properly but it wont open. also had the same issue with other games. can someone help me
 
4.50 star(s) 96 Votes