CAPTAIN'S LOG, DAY 237
Our wait continues in a permanent unending limbo for the promised update. As the gumdrops discord descended into chaos, even the most ardent supporters questioned the lengthy delay that even the P and P Lily of the Valley devs would have put the brakes on and said, 'that's a bridge too far.' Gumdrops unleashed a great ban hammer, blocking all dissent that did not bend, for he believed just because he gave his explanation, thus explanation automatically exonerated any further retort/questioning, but alas, I am but a noble space Captain, not here to judge the petty politics among fellow Space Pirates.
IN OTHER NEWS on the great F95zone, your captain here awaits eagerly, hand on mighty cock, for the great ICSTOR and Summertime saga updates, that draw ever closer. Sadly, the coding of the Summertime Saga takes longer than expected, (can't wait to knock up that Aunt aye?). I have made sure to banish my wife and lil' Suzy before the release date, for they are clearly not needed. Shadman continues to draw fine artwork, yet he refuses to draw Bowsette, perhaps to fly against the current, but we have all agreed amongst the crew, gay or not, we'd still smash. (This decision was taken at 64 to 23 votes).
The NLT MEDIA update of Lust epidemic proved mighty fine, for I do love a chilling mystery while trying to pork all the women. The crew have calculated if we to harvest on the planet, it would bring a mighty space haul worth over 9000 credits at least, but even with 9000 credits worth of donations, we find it ever harder to find a trustworthy dev, so few and far between they are.
The survivors from the Gum drops have stopped pouring, those that were left out were obliterated by the Void, and only the most ardent of it's supporters fully remain, having performed much mental gymnastics to justify the wait. Poor poor fools. Only now has Gumdrops 'considered' hiring someone to help...(wait what, seriously? Now? NOW? Only now its...fuck it never mind), SUCH EXCITING TIMES WE LIVE IN LADDYS AND LADDETTES.
STRAIGHT FROM THE CAPTAINS CHAIR! Perhaps my ardent mangy lot, some are wondering where my iconic Arnold eye popping image has gone? Perhaps some have wondered in my absence whether I had abandoned you on this perilous thread? Fear not, for this noble space Captain brings great news. He has now been employed a Script-Writer the great Taffy Tales by UberPie! Where I will no doubt churn out material like a Terminator on Meth. If you enjoying reading ye Captain's tales, I too have a patreon now, where I will be trying to write my own original material/videos. (Horror, fantasy, sci-fi etc as well), feel free to pop over to the Tavern, should ye find you balls be blue from the great wait, or you be in need of a good read.
Taffy Tales patreon -
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Lostraven patreon -
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But enough Shilling! For I already sense the mods fingers getting itchy over the delete button! That is not why ye come to listen to my tales and news as old as time. Some decent Japanese translations have released, and for some reason Echii Sensei is popular BECAUSE....well, um, *shrugs*.
What adventures lay beyond the reach? Will ICSTOR and SummertimeSaga's updates be enough to sate the Captain's desires? Will lil' Suzy ever become the Shadman drawing she dreams she will become? Will Gumdrops finally deliver at last on the darkest of promises, and release the Dual Family Update? Will it even be worth it after all this wait? Tune in next time on Toonami for The Captain's Log! Signing off!