I haven't read the whole current content, but I figure I've seen enough to form an opinion for now.
On one side, I really like this game so far. I like the MC quite a bit, and while the plot seems to be in no hurry to go anywhere, I'm just enjoying the journey.
On the other side, I have a problem with the way this is written. It seems like the author is trying really hard to have the characters sound like they fit in a middle-ages kinda fantasy setting, thereby forgetting a few important things.
Firstly, all the speech is so formal, even between MC and Lyria, who've traveled together for almost six years. You'd think they'd talk in a more relaxed fashion to each other. It feels pretty unnatural. Of course, this is just my opinion, any maybe I'm the only one who feels that way...
Secondly, there are a lot of small mistakes in the script. There is: Clear typos (ocurse -> course), a weird overuse of question marks where there are no questions, an almost complete lack of vocative commas, the occasional wrong tense, a somewhat frequent use of the wrong article (the, a/an, or neither), wrong word order in indirect questions... Also, I don't think I've ever seen a document of any lenth that uses the word 'albeit' this often; in one or two cases a simpler word like 'yet' would have been more correct and sounded less stilted.
I was going to leave the kind of comment I have left on many other games, where I would just compile all the mistakes I found in a big list, but I've made over 180 screenshots of lines that, in my eyes, need some kind of correction, and I just don't have it in me to compile all of those into a list. I'm just going to trust that the developer is capable of proofreading his script without me pointing to every single mistake, if they are willing.
I plan on returning to this game in the future and seeing if there is any improvement. I think this could be a great game with a revised script. So far, I'd call it decent overall.
