Yes, for that I hate you....
I prefer fetishes being optional, too, because I do not share a lot of them, but I knew from the beginning that I would need to swallow something I am not prepared for (extra lame pun absolutely intended, feel free to hate me).
True. If the dev wants to tell a story and is up front about the fetishes being non-optional then everything is good in my view. If they say they are optional and there are unavoidable scenes that include that fetish, then that is a no go.However I do not think that fetishes need to be optional, because in the end the dev wants to tell a story, and if that requires a fetish to exist in game, then it needs to be there. There can be completely optional games of course, but they either base the fetishes as bonuses on a vanilla minded base game or are more or less completely sandboxy, neither of which is the case with this game. So if you want a "three fetishes only" game, even more so when you want to pick which fetish with whom (meant as a general observation, you didn't claim that), this game just isn't what you want.