I like it, its a nice intro. Beautiful presentation, both audio and visual.
I'll reiterate what others have said, it needs a pass from a native english speaker, there are a number of places where its jarring to read. It's not bad though! And your humor is coming across very well, especially things like the drawn out pauses and awkward silences. Looking forward to getting to the hook that sets this apart from the common "horny doofus" games
A request: Labels on the main menu UI buttons (perhaps On:Hover), a confirmation on the exit button. And consider adding back the left/right/disable option for rollback; I play on touchscreen so its important!