VN Ren'Py Heart Problems [v0.10] [Xenorav]

[MaxRichard]

So uh, the reasons you got for the "atrocious writing" is literally 90% of AVNs.
Theres a reason why theres something called a "Porn-game scenario"
Just like the "I'm struck in the washing machine, help me stepbro"-scenario,
shits absolutely ridiculous, but most still manage to stroke the snake to it(which is the point).
And saying that it's disrespectful to other devs with good writing, is actually more disrespectful in itself.
If you're out here putting down other devs styles, just because you like certain ones, is really sad.
This is all Your opinion, because i guarantee that theres devs with really good wrting out there,
who can definitely enjoy the default "porn-game scenario"-style of AVNs aswell.
Although they themselves decide, to take their own novels to a different plain entirely.

So there is 100% AVNs out there, with amazing writing and captivating stories.
But if you play one of those, and then expect every other AVN you jump into, to have the same,
you'll never be satisfied with any writing whatsoever.
If you cannot embrace the ridiculousness of certain elements in these novels,
theres not really much anybody can tell you, besides pick up a best-selling book and read that shit instead.
Thats honestly the best advice i can give, if you're craving Only good writing and realistic moments.

Thats just My opinion on this matter, gotta be positive and embrace things sometimes, and stop being a debbie-downer.

I'm not being a debbie downer... the dude literally called this a once-in-a-lifetime masterpiece in writing. In fact, I even said I like this AVN for what it tries to do well, which is the renders.

If someone claims Hellen Keller was a great tennis player and I call that out saying she was a great author but not an athlete, that's not me putting people down. It's just stating a matter of fact.

Anyone who releases anything publicly should expect feedback. They always have the choice to not visit this forum if they don't want to hear it.

Forbidding criticism and expecting people to only say nice things is unrealistic. It is also how we get terrible tragedies like the Star Wars prequels and North Korea.

My approach to life is the exact opposite. Encourage criticism and grow from it. If mankind never pushed boundaries and never tried to achieve more than what we already have, we would still be living in caves.

 

[PR Mitter]

Savannah bond

None of these ass looking pornstars would do justice to this character. This is one of the best looking AVN characters out there.

 

[Kookiezie]

I have not play the game and i have questions. Is it AVN? or can you do free roam and choose girls?

 

[Darkman200]

I'm not being a debbie downer... the dude literally called this a once-in-a-lifetime masterpiece in writing. In fact, I even said I like this AVN for what it tries to do well, which is the renders.

If someone claims Hellen Keller was a great tennis player and I call that out saying she was a great author but not an athlete, that's not me putting people down. It's just stating a matter of fact.

Anyone who releases anything publicly should expect feedback. They always have the choice to not visit this forum if they don't want to hear it.

Forbidding criticism and expecting people to only say nice things is unrealistic. It is also how we get terrible tragedies like the Star Wars prequels and North Korea.

My approach to life is the exact opposite. Encourage criticism and grow from it. If mankind never pushed boundaries and never tried to achieve more than what we already have, we would still be living in caves.

The problem is that it doesn’t go beyond being a porn game; it doesn’t have good writing, but that doesn’t matter if your goal is just to jerk off. Many creators of these types of games simply don’t take criticism seriously because it’s not like they’re contractually obligated to establish a quality standard, and that greatly influences the quality of a game. Basically, you have to start from the nuance that a porn game and good writing, unfortunately, don’t usually coincide. There are few creators who make a game where at least the story makes some sense.
Additionally, there are issues like the fetishes that creators might have. Many things seen in porn are very hard to encounter in real life, not to mention that they’re overly fantastical. AVN creators often project their darkest desires into their games, and in many cases, they create nonsensical situations whose sole purpose is to generate arousal. These games are consumed based on the specific fetish a person has. For instance, if I don’t like NTR games, there are many other people who love them, and it’s not because they find them logical but because of the arousal they provoke. Their only goal is to achieve that excitement these games can generate.
Therefore, many creators choose to create excessively provocative games but with nonsensical stories because there’s a large majority of people with these preferences who consume them and don’t care about logic.

 

[Mercurialthespectre]

I have not play the game and i have questions. Is it AVN? or can you do free roam and choose girls?

It was an AVN so u can't free roam but u can choose to be not to be with certain girls

 

[oustundag]

Tbh I lost my interest to the game at this point. I don't care anymore whether he shares any updates or not. One update a year is a joke.

 

[thela2]

they should add edging as a tag i understand slow progressing and stuff its ok but you already gave 6 oral on 10 tight job but sex never its forbidden at some point i got frustrated and just start skipping especially with the milf

 

[Use@4&;]

Guys do u know..Damaged coda (the office) game Developer is back

 

[TheRealWimzy]

I'm not really a gambling man, but what are the odds that he "Went to jail" again?
I swear, if some weird excuse for delay on progress report comes, and people keep suckin' copium..
I'll lose all the rest of my faith in the community around this novel.

 

[kingm32323]

His Last update was more of a i lost my Patron account please support me on SS. Sucks but this dev just flaky.

 

[el_pejelagarto]

I don't think the writing is that bad. I mean, editing is definitely required for spelling/grammar/style, but the substance of it is overall fine and accomplishes what it should. Each of the characters tends to act out in the way that makes sense for their character, and there's something somewhat believable about the way events play out. Even the way MC and Amelie are really pushing it and in danger of being too obvious and getting caught, makes sense given that they're clearly starting to lose self-control of themselves. It's not bad storytelling, for the kind of story it's trying to tell and the needs of the kink genre it is aiming to satisfy.

I dont know man. The fact that the MC looses completely all concept of consent, and out of the blue becomes basically a pushy rapey creep made me cringe hard. The celebration dinner for his new job and the beach episode were the worst offenders.

Amelie and the MC are already in a highly risky situation, it doesn't make any sense that they want to pour gasoline to an already sizable fire. It is specially hard to watch when David is onscreen and the MC gets closer to Amelie and touches/grabs her disregarding completely the context. I don't know if that an integral part of the "incest" fetish/fantasy, but to me is just bad writing. All events could literally be set up in a better way that don't involve extreme mental gymnastics, massive suspend of disbelief and continuous ass-pulls to make the story flow.

The thing is that this game just need some plot restructuring, some rewrites (to make it more believable), ground the MC personality to what it was at the beginning of the game and this could be a far better game compared to what it is now. I mean the renders and animations are beyond incredible, they just need better story to boot.

 

[SonsOfLiberty]

His Last update was more of a i lost my Patron account please support me on SS. Sucks but this dev just flaky.

Err no, the update came out well before he lost his Patreon.

 

[Bestigger]

I'm not really a gambling man, but what are the odds that he "Went to jail" again?
I swear, if some weird excuse for delay on progress report comes, and people keep suckin' copium..
I'll lose all the rest of my faith in the community around this novel.

Wait did he actually say he went to jail? We need a bingo card.

 

[TheRealWimzy]

Wait did he actually say he went to jail? We need a bingo card.

Yeah that was the latest excuse, before his recent return , only time will tell what the next one is.
A bingo card would actually be interesting lmao.

 

[Pervy Sensei]

I dont know man. The fact that the MC looses completely all concept of consent, and out of the blue becomes basically a pushy rapey creep made me cringe hard. The celebration dinner for his new job and the beach episode were the worst offenders.

Amelie and the MC are already in a highly risky situation, it doesn't make any sense that they want to pour gasoline to an already sizable fire. It is specially hard to watch when David is onscreen and the MC gets closer to Amelie and touches/grabs her disregarding completely the context. I don't know if that an integral part of the "incest" fetish/fantasy, but to me is just bad writing. All events could literally be set up in a better way that don't involve extreme mental gymnastics, massive suspend of disbelief and continuous ass-pulls to make the story flow.

The thing is that this game just need some plot restructuring, some rewrites (to make it more believable), ground the MC personality to what it was at the beginning of the game and this could be a far better game compared to what it is now. I mean the renders and animations are beyond incredible, they just need better story to boot.

I don't see the MC losing all concept of consent. Before I dated, I had this naive view about how there was always this kind of explicit agreement beforehand by the two partners that sex would happen. I remember quickly learning otherwise from my early experiences with dating and relationships. I could often, without thinking about it beforehand, and or even telling myself in advance I would act otherwise, be pushy about sex. But the girls would never have called what I was doing rape (sometimes they can be pushy about sex too, ya know). I was just horny, and sometimes they pushed back and I stopped---and sometimes they relented and decided they were horny too. In retrospect, I don't find anything unnatural or immoral about that. When the pushiness becomes violent, or involves drugging the other person, that's when we are solidly in bad territory; but the MC isn't doing any of that. Amelie could actually end it at any point if she really wanted to, but she doesn't really want to and that's why her resistance is often half-hearted. Anyone who's dated a woman understands that.

As I mentioned in my previous post, what's going on with Amelie and the MC is that they are losing self-control, having a harder and harder time being rational. Amelie, as the more mature person, is better at staying rational, but it's clear even she is giving in to the raw desire they feel for one another. It's also clear that the dev means for their growing boldness to be noticed, as we have a couple of specific moments that focus on Davie seeing them do things which draw his quiet attention. The fact that they're getting to be painfully obvious builds up suspense and concern on the part of the player, who will naturally wish for them to calm down before they get caught. The player is supposed to feel that way and to see what's coming, a building up to a dramatic moment in which the MC's secret relationship with the women is finally exposed. For sure we can expect an explosive drama in the coming updates. If we don't, and Davie's response ends up wimpy, then that's when we can say it's become bad storytelling.

Besides the plot development, another thing at play here is probably what the dev means for the player to feel here. I mentioned already the feeling of suspense and concern of the player to not get caught. But there's another layer here, which is that the story has been a slow burn, building up more and more the desire of the player to finally see Amelie and the MC fuck. The increasingly strong desire of the player to see it happen is mirrored in the characters themselves, in their feelings and actions as increasingly lacking control. This mirroring is purposeful. Precisely why the player feels concern is because the player also feels growing and irrational desire as the characters do. The potential of that desire being foiled and remaining unsatisfied helps build up the feeling of suspense in the player. If you're feeling that suspense in abundance, then the dev's storytelling here is clearly successful. You should be feeling that you really don't want them to fuck things up before they fuck, while at the same time sharing the MC's desire to finally fuck Amelie now, now, now.

Anyway, I will say the one time I thought it was a bit over the top was when they were in the ocean and their family members were hitting the ball back and forth. Maybe that one was just a little too obvious and in the face of Davie. I suppose the dev just wanted us to feel that way intensely and was willing to push the envelope of believability to achieve it. I remain ambivalent on that one. My thought there is that it wasn't the worst idea, but perhaps the execution of that event could have been better and more believable somehow.

 

[el_pejelagarto]

I don't see the MC losing all concept of consent. Before I dated, I had this naive view about how there was always this kind of explicit agreement beforehand by the two partners that sex would happen. I remember quickly learning otherwise from my early experiences with dating and relationships. I could often, without thinking about it beforehand, and or even telling myself in advance I would act otherwise, be pushy about sex. But the girls would never have called what I was doing rape (sometimes they can be pushy about sex too, ya know). I was just horny, and sometimes they pushed back and I stopped---and sometimes they relented and decided they were horny too. In retrospect, I don't find anything unnatural or immoral about that. When the pushiness becomes violent, or involves drugging the other person, that's when we are solidly in bad territory; but the MC isn't doing any of that. Amelie could actually end it at any point if she really wanted to, but she doesn't really want to and that's why her resistance is often half-hearted. Anyone who's dated a woman understands that.

As I mentioned in my previous post, what's going on with Amelie and the MC is that they are losing self-control, having a harder and harder time being rational. Amelie, as the more mature person, is better at staying rational, but it's clear even she is giving in to the raw desire they feel for one another. It's also clear that the dev means for their growing boldness to be noticed, as we have a couple of specific moments that focus on Davie seeing them do things which draw his quiet attention. The fact that they're getting to be painfully obvious builds up suspense and concern on the part of the player, who will naturally wish for them to calm down before they get caught. The player is supposed to feel that way and to see what's coming, a building up to a dramatic moment in which the MC's secret relationship with the women is finally exposed. For sure we can expect an explosive drama in the coming updates. If we don't, and Davie's response ends up wimpy, then that's when we can say it's become bad storytelling.

Besides the plot development, another thing at play here is probably what the dev means for the player to feel here. I mentioned already the feeling of suspense and concern of the player to not get caught. But there's another layer here, which is that the story has been a slow burn, building up more and more the desire of the player to finally see Amelie and the MC fuck. The increasingly strong desire of the player to see it happen is mirrored in the characters themselves, in their feelings and actions as increasingly lacking control. This mirroring is purposeful. Precisely why the player feels concern is because the player also feels growing and irrational desire as the characters do. The potential of that desire being foiled and remaining unsatisfied helps build up the feeling of suspense in the player. If you're feeling that suspense in abundance, then the dev's storytelling here is clearly successful. You should be feeling that you really don't want them to fuck things up before they fuck, while at the same time sharing the MC's desire to finally fuck Amelie now, now, now.

Anyway, I will say the one time I thought it was a bit over the top was when they were in the ocean and their family members were hitting the ball back and forth. Maybe that one was just a little too obvious and in the face of Davie. I suppose the dev just wanted us to feel that way intensely and was willing to push the envelope of believability to achieve it. I remain ambivalent on that one. My thought there is that it wasn't the worst idea, but perhaps the execution of that event could have been better and more believable somehow.

Regarding the suspense and buildup to their relationship being exposed and the MC pushiness, I agree that tension and risk are integral to a story like this. However, there’s a fine line between building suspense and straining believability. When the MC acts recklessly in front of others, it undermines the tension because it starts to feel contrived. For instance, we both agreed that the beach ball scene as an example where the believability might have been pushed too far. I’d argue that moments like this are precisely what weaken the story. Instead of creating suspense, they rely on exaggerated, unrealistic behavior to generate drama. This approach cheapens the impact of the eventual payoff, as it doesn’t feel earned. Of course, this is all framed in the fact that this is a fictional situation and creative liberties can be taken, but that doesn't mean to have carte blanche to create ridiculous situations where the MC acts like he is brain-dead and the only logic he has come from his dick.

I also take issue with the idea that the dev is trying to mirror the player’s desire in the MC’s actions. If anything, it highlights why grounding the MC's character is so important. The player’s emotional investment should come from good storytelling—not from feeling pressured into aligning with an impulsive, inconsistent protagonist. If the MC had a more relatable arc that showed him grappling with his desires and the consequences of his actions in a more meaningful way, the story would be much stronger.

 

[Joe8]

Jail

Or

Hemorrhoids


Jail or hemorrhoids this time?
I feel new job problems.

 

[Deleted member 8129661]

if someone else makes heart problems fan games in the future will the original creator xenorav object or will there be no problem

 

[manblu]

I saw many of those who say that they wonder if it will be the Christmas update???? what an idiot, keep donating, the free ones have time to see their shit

 

[Cryptist]

That's why I wear my pants backwards. ))

I, too, suffer from prehensile "pachyderm proboscis" penile syndrome. I can eat popcorn without using my hands.