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JKRollin'

Member
Dec 3, 2021
197
224
what the fuck is this joke in the first sex scene of ariana, Just TIP FUCKING gets her cum like a broken faucet(madwoman?) BUT all an all she is the perfect waifu for me her cuckqueen streak is a boon for US.:ROFLMAO::D:poop:
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Uthuriel

Conversation Conqueror
Jan 26, 2021
6,889
21,490
what the fuck is this joke in the first sex scene of ariana, Just TIP FUCKING gets her cum like a broken faucet(madwoman?):ROFLMAO::D:poop:
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The dev fixed the scene a bit... it's still really bad... definitely one of the worst scenes in the game... and the worst deflowering scene in any AVN I've seen so far...
 

Playertheguy

Newbie
Mar 18, 2019
44
109
Man, the game is really fun, and i am really liking it.
-Its weird that Kaela is my favorite, maybe followed by book girl or the twins not-twins. Because basically every other girl aside from Kaela is just a different shade of "i really like you, and have done so for a really long time but, never did anything because of *insert random reason to reject the mc for 2-3 years*"
Like seriously, at some point i lost some interest in them because it was always the same thing, with just a different reason.

--Now, a posible problem with the story is that the mc is a Gary Stu, he is great at magic, at melee, with a bow, and on top of that he learns thing super easily. The only reason anyone is better than him at something is because he has not studied that particular thing for a long time.
Usually, if a character is good at magic, he is weaker at melee, so he needs someone to help him with that. Or if he is really strong, he is not that good with studies, making it so others can help him with the more intelectual tasks.
But the way you set him up, the only people that can beat him at anything, are the ones that have much more practice than him.
So now i think that your only option to balance him is probably to make a really big threat that his Gary Stu powers cant deal with alone... but if you do that, you will also need to make some characters also grow a lot in specific fields to be able to suport him meaningfully in the story.
 
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Jabbonk

Member
Game Developer
Apr 10, 2022
345
4,136
--Now, a posible problem with the story is that the mc is a Gary Stu, he is great at magic, at melee, with a bow, and on top of that he learns thing super easily. The only reason anyone is better than him at something is because he has not studied that particular thing for a long time.
Usually, if a character is good at magic, he is weaker at melee, so he needs someone to help him with that. Or if he is really strong, he is not that good with studies, making it so others can help him with the more intelectual tasks.
But the way you set him up, the only people that can beat him at anything, are the ones that have much more practice than him.
So now i think that your only option to balance him is probably to make a really big threat that his Gary Stu powers cant deal with alone... but if you do that, you will also need to make some characters also grow a lot in specific fields to be able to suport him meaningfully in the story.
Thanks for the review! I really appreciate it! Though, there are a couple of issues you brought up that I would like to address.

First, I'm only 3.5 chapters into a very long story. I can understand how some people might see MC as a 'Gary Stu' for the moment, but it's because he still hasn't left the comfort of home and there haven't been any real conflicts yet. I mean, there are definitely some intended 'Gary Stu' elements to him, the game is meant to be a bit of a power fantasy, after all... But if you give it a little more time, you'll see that things are actually pretty well balanced on a global scale.

Yes, usually it's better to spread skills and talents out evenly amongst your cast of characters, however, without delving into my reasons why, MC is more of a "Jack of all trades, master of none" type (Someone who has dabbled in a wide variety of skills, rather than gaining expertise by focusing on only one). Generally, the goal was to have more options for players to choose from throughout the story.

Second, just because he has a lot of affinities, it doesn't mean that he's 'great at magic'. It's explained in Maryn's first scene that usually the more affinities you have, the weaker each one will be. So, yes, he's a good healer (at least compared to Maryn), but it's mentioned several times that he's not a great mystic... Remember, Maryn became a master in Mysticism after 5 years, and MC took nearly 3 years just to master a single 'pocket dimension' spell. The Mysticism skill divide between them is immense. I was aiming for that "Jack of all trades" angle with the magic as well.

I also feel like I should point out that MC has been in 4 on-screen fights so far and he only (sort of) won once! I may be wrong, but I thought that 'losing' wasn't exactly a common trait for Gary Stus. Not to say that losing these mostly inconsequential fights would disqualify him for Stu-ness, but I think it's still a valid point against it. Also, he admits that several of the other characters could kick his ass and he openly praises people for being better at a lot of the things you pointed out (i.e. Tells Ariana that he knows she's smarter than him but that she just doesn't try, tells Lydia that she's a better archer because he's gotten too bulky, and mentions that Cordelia could easily kick his ass if she ever wanted to.)

After a couple more chapters, everything will come into focus.
Anyway, I'm rambling now... Thanks again for the review and sorry for the text wall.
I hope nothing above comes across as anything but cordial.
 

Uthuriel

Conversation Conqueror
Jan 26, 2021
6,889
21,490
--Now, a posible problem with the story is that the mc is a Gary Stu, he is great at magic, at melee, with a bow, and on top of that he learns thing super easily. The only reason anyone is better than him at something is because he has not studied that particular thing for a long time.
Usually, if a character is good at magic, he is weaker at melee, so he needs someone to help him with that. Or if he is really strong, he is not that good with studies, making it so others can help him with the more intelectual tasks.
But the way you set him up, the only people that can beat him at anything, are the ones that have much more practice than him.
So now i think that your only option to balance him is probably to make a really big threat that his Gary Stu powers cant deal with alone... but if you do that, you will also need to make some characters also grow a lot in specific fields to be able to suport him meaningfully in the story.
You complain about tropes in fantasy, yet you write the most cliché shit I've ever read... :rolleyes: :FacePalm:
 
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motseer

Engaged Member
Dec 17, 2021
3,632
8,871
What gripes my ass is the assumption that excellence and being gifted are bad things. Toss out a name; like Chad or Gary Stu, as if they are the prototype assholes of overachievment. By god! Hell yeah! Let us all strive for mediocrity and wallow in it together. So sayeth the wimp behind the machine who never met a challenge in his pathetic life.
 

HornyyPussy

Message Maven
Apr 26, 2020
15,450
36,104
What gripes my ass is the assumption that excellence and being gifted are bad things. Toss out a name; like Chad or Gary Stu, as if they are the prototype assholes of overachievment. By god! Hell yeah! Let us all strive for mediocrity and wallow in it together. So sayeth the wimp behind the machine who never met a challenge in his pathetic life.
You tell 'em!







or....you go girl!
 

Jabbonk

Member
Game Developer
Apr 10, 2022
345
4,136
progress chpt4p2 week 10.jpg

Hey homies,

Here are the (identical) and the reports

TLDR
-Made it over a small hurdle that has been tripping me up on S9
-Rendering the hell out of s12

That's all folks!
Much love!
JB
 

SovietRev

Newbie
Jul 25, 2021
49
61
You don't really need one... The choices only pertain to fight or flee, eat or starve, who you want to fuck and whether you live or die.
This, and also, the wording of the choices is pretty straightforward, like you can easily understand/imagine what choice leads to what outcome.

Oh and Jabbonk, I honestly love all the lore/info-dump scenes but I just wish it was easier to navigate some of them when they have sub-choices (?) do not know if that made sense but yeah.
 
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Jabbonk

Member
Game Developer
Apr 10, 2022
345
4,136
progress chpt4p2 week 11.jpg

Hey Homies,

Here's the and the .

Finished off S9 and S12 and now all that's left is S10. It's quite a bit longer and needs a lot more work, but it has my full attention until the chapter is finished.

No TLDR this week because the above sentence is essentially all I said in the reports anyway.

Much love!
JB
 

Blackhearts

Newbie
Feb 3, 2019
63
67
Keyboard warriors/impatient fappers be the worst.

Dev is absolutely amazing. He's the only one with gives detailed info of where he's at/where he's going. Giving ample info at that too.
Plus weekly updates on progress... mind you.. he's making this quality vn on his freaking own. (Not counting the amazing testers)


It's free, gets updates on the reg and has super awesome tailor made content.
Go on and hop away if it's not your thing. Just don't come with baseless accusations and non constructive whining.
 

Joker Jack

Member
Aug 9, 2022
143
216
Keyboard warriors/impatient fappers be the worst.

Dev is absolutely amazing. He's the only one with gives detailed info of where he's at/where he's going. Giving ample info at that too.
Plus weekly updates on progress... mind you.. he's making this quality vn on his freaking own. (Not counting the amazing testers)


It's free, gets updates on the reg and has super awesome tailor made content.
Go on and hop away if it's not your thing. Just don't come with baseless accusations and non constructive whining.
Bruh jokes on you, i don't even fap to these games or fap at all, on my 1yr no fap streak, i just play them for sake of playing games outside the norm with a little spice and i was actually complimenting the guy cause although i don't know him personally i still kinda know him and know he won't abandon the game and will make sure to complete it no matter how long it takes,so that was kinda a reassurance with a bit of humor(must've been a bad one) so if y'all saw it as whining or complaining, meh ‍♂
 

Jabbonk

Member
Game Developer
Apr 10, 2022
345
4,136
progress chpt4p2 week 12.jpg

Hey Homies,
Here's the and the reports.

TLDR
-I spent most of my time testing scenes and running sample animations
-otherwise, I kinda sucked this week. My head wasn't really in the game...

My bad, homies...
Much love!
JB
 
4.30 star(s) 87 Votes