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VN Ren'Py How I Became the Bodyguard of the Saintess! [v0.8.1] [Lunardis]

4.60 star(s) 29 Votes

BlindBigot

Member
Sep 24, 2021
143
212
That's it! I knew I was forgetting something, that was the less Sainty sister! :p

And clearly, you're unfair, you also have a princess you can seduce with the small act of fighting demons and monsters, or a knight commander you can seduce with the small act of fighting demons and monsters.

Wait, could it be, I have a weird fetish or something...
May this fetish be "Blood for the Blood God!"? Seducing a girl by using a pile of skulls, of creatures you've slain, is quite unique.
 
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Rodrigoofb

Professional Lurker
Uploader
Aug 24, 2020
797
4,576
Good start, the game shows promise, but the DEV notes says that after the "common route", there's gonna be a path for every heroine in the game. So that means no Harem? We're gonna have to pick one route and stick to it?
 
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Lunardis

Member
Game Developer
Aug 15, 2021
162
719
I wonder IF will be harem
Good start, the game shows promise, but the DEV notes says that after the "common route", there's gonna be a path for every heroine in the game. So that means no Harem? We're gonna have to pick one route and stick to it?
Nope, no harem. And yes, I know harem is popular, I really hesitated over this one. As much as I want to please this community, my priority is to tell a coherent (and good) story, and I can't find a way to integrate a harem without making the characters step out of their personality.

After the common route, I'll ask for each new update the girl people (=patreon) want me to focus on. To say it differently, after some time, the game will propose different parallel universes, and you will have the possibility to look at them in the order you want.
 

PeggyBlackett

Engaged Member
Jan 24, 2018
2,564
2,294
"Saintess"

So many people don't know existing words or usages, so they make up silly ones.

A female saint is a "saint"

"Saintess"? Eww

From other places:

"Knightess" is ludicrous. A female who has been knighted is either a "knight", or in some societies, a "dame"

"Princedom" is stupid. While a realm ruled by a king is a "kingdom", one ruled by a prince {like Monaco} is a "principality". {And a monarchy ruled by a queen is still a "kingdom", not a "queendom" - i've actually seen that verbal abomination at least once somewhere...}

======================

In this case, it appears that the original writer doesn't really know English -r that there may actually be a term analogous to "saintess" in the original language {i assume Japanese}? So there's SOME excuse. But whoever rendered it into English should know better
 

ciphertul

Well-Known Member
Jun 20, 2018
1,511
808
Nope, no harem. And yes, I know harem is popular, I really hesitated over this one. As much as I want to please this community, my priority is to tell a coherent (and good) story, and I can't find a way to integrate a harem without making the characters step out of their personality.
I may be alone on this but if you want to keep the story good then don't go full ham on the h-scenes. I have read too many VNs that quickly loss the story that way.
 
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Lunardis

Member
Game Developer
Aug 15, 2021
162
719
In this case, it appears that the original writer doesn't really know English -r that there may actually be a term analogous to "saintess" in the original language {i assume Japanese}? So there's SOME excuse. But whoever rendered it into English should know better
English is not my native language, and yes, I'm the original writer and... that's it, I didn't have anyone to help me, I'm also the one who rendered the text in English. Honestly, if the word Saintess is the only problem, I'm pretty happy, I was expecting much harsher criticism.

Now for the word itself. I really like materials like manga, visual novels or anime, and the word Saintess is often used there. Maybe because it is translated from Japanese, as you said, or because Saintess seemed more appropriate for the translator, I don't know.

To give some examples, with a quick search:

- Manga: the hidden saintess.

- Webnovel : the Saintess and the Villainess

- Manga again: The saintess has a showdown.

Anyway, probably because this game is inspired by those kinds of material, I thought Saintess was more appropriate. To me, it gives a "manga/anime" feeling.

I'm not saying I'm right or anything, just explaining how the word came.
 

ciphertul

Well-Known Member
Jun 20, 2018
1,511
808
English is not my native language, and yes, I'm the original writer and... that's it, I didn't have anyone to help me, I'm also the one who rendered the text in English. Honestly, if the word Saintess is the only problem, I'm pretty happy, I was expecting much harsher criticism.

Now for the word itself. I really like materials like manga, visual novels or anime, and the word Saintess is often used there. Maybe because it is translated from Japanese, as you said, or because Saintess seemed more appropriate for the translator, I don't know.

To give some examples, with a quick search:

- Manga: the hidden saintess.

- Webnovel : the Saintess and the Villainess

- Manga again: The saintess has a showdown.

Anyway, probably because this game is inspired by those kinds of material, I thought Saintess was more appropriate. To me, it gives a "manga/anime" feeling.

I'm not saying I'm right or anything, just explaining how the word came.
Don't worry what others say about the words you uses, what you mean comes across and it is you story you can whatever words you like.
 

PeggyBlackett

Engaged Member
Jan 24, 2018
2,564
2,294
English is not my native language, and yes, I'm the original writer.
snip

Anyway, probably because this game is inspired by those kinds of material, I thought Saintess was more appropriate. To me, it gives a "manga/anime" feeling.

I'm not saying I'm right or anything, just explaining how the word came.
Hey - no problem, really - i'd just been clanging up against "knightess" and "princedom" and the like in works by people whose native language definitely is English and should have no excuse for butchering the language - in one case, "princedom" appeared every few pages in a professionally-published fantasy novel - and, since i know the editor, i know there was no excuse for that particular linguistic horror getting through to publication.

Eventually, repeated solecisms just get to me.

Some others: "chaise lounge" {proper term is "chaise longue"; it's French} ... constantly using the wrong word from "to.too/two" ... "flaunt" where the context makes it obvious they wanted "flout" ... and vice-versa.

You just were there when the volcano erupted. Sorry.
 
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Lunardis

Member
Game Developer
Aug 15, 2021
162
719
According to the dev, how often will there be an update?
I really can't wait, this game is amazing
I'm... sorry, I really can't answer right now. I'm fairly new to this and don't feel confident enough to estimate when Chapter 2 will be released. I have a deadline in mind, but things can go much faster, or much longer, too soon to tell.

What I can say is that I have most of the story in my head already, and there's a lot of stuff that I really want to show to everyone. And this kind of feedback definitely gives me more motivation :giggle:
 

Lunardis

Member
Game Developer
Aug 15, 2021
162
719
Hey - no problem, really - i'd just been clanging up against "knightess" and "princedom" and the like in works by people whose native language definitely is English and should have no excuse for butchering the language - in one case, "princedom" appeared every few pages in a professionally-published fantasy novel - and, since i know the editor, i know there was no excuse for that particular linguistic horror getting through to publication.
I wasn't especially offended, you took some time to explain your complaint, it seemed natural to take as much time to explain why I chose that word.

I was also a little worried, the next game I want to work with should be called "the knightess living in the princedom with her chaise lounge", so you know, I was afraid you'd burn a city or two ;)

Anyway, I understand, I can be a bit picky myself when it comes to my native language, so no problem, really.
 
4.60 star(s) 29 Votes