I discovered that game only a few days ago and I have to admit the art is really good and the overall impression of the game is that it’s of a way higher quality than the average H-game. Here are my few critiques, hopefully you’ll find them constructive.
We are not all fans of Harry Potter, meaning that when we have to go to a specific girl’s room we should have a hint to know if it’s Griffindor, Ravenclaw, etc…
The xray thing is unintuitive, especially since it’s on top of another clickable device (the cabinet). I had to read on this forum to find out it has a cooldown, all by myself I didn’t find a way to use it even once. Maybe using another mechanism, like a pop-up menu when we invite a girl in or making it a passive ability automatically activated when it’s possible would be better.
The IMVOIS thing is a cool idea but catastrophically implemented. It reads as a law with a lot of rules and exceptions. Just say “there is a magical protection of the female students’ virtue, and while it’s enough to protect them against inexperienced male students a trained wizard can find ways around it”. With that you can remove a painful wall of text and you can hand-wave explanations as you see fit: Here the player can’t go further with a girl because his control is too low, there he has to offer a ring forged in voyeurium to render the girl vulnerable to the xray spell without triggering the IMVOIS and so on.
As for the text being too long, I have a different opinion from most of the other posters on that forum so I will have to write something which is also quite long (sorry) to explain my points.
The problem is not that there is too much text, the problem is it’s not about the right stuff. There are so much things about the school politics which we don’t care about, it should be kept minimal. On the other hand it’s a training game, meaning it’s all about turning innocent and proud girls into submissive bitches in heat. It’s not only about seeing boobs, it’s about the girls REALLY not wanting to show their boobs but being manipulated into showing them anyway. We have to feel the struggle of the girls, their shame and awe while they wriggle like flies in the web of a carefully elaborated plan before reluctantly giving up, all the while they are unable to restrain or even comprehend an unwanted arousal. For that the text has to be convincing, meaning it has to be rather long since there is no shortcut around the negotiations and justifications, arguments and counter arguments, pretexts and rationalizations needed to describe the reluctance of the girls and how it’s overcome.
Let me give you an example. For the Hermione’s puzzle she accepts almost right away the bet, she only says she won’t get totally naked. She even offers a bonus in case of big success! It’s so off her character, there is no way a girl as prude as Hermione would accept an obvious sexual bet from the get go from a man she barely knows, let alone overbid.
And one last thing about the writing, I haven’t played the last chapter but from what I understand there is no penetration scene with any of the main girls yet. I strongly advise against giving them an orgasm during their first time. I know I’m alone on that since every game makes girls scream in pleasure as soon as they have half a penis in them but I can explain why I'm against it.
There is so much to write about if the girl’s pleasure is not a given but an objective. Besides, it makes the female orgasm way more rewarding for the player if he has to “work” for it, especially if the girl tries to resist but can’t help but to finally yield to pleasure in the most degrading way when the player does the right things.
We are not all fans of Harry Potter, meaning that when we have to go to a specific girl’s room we should have a hint to know if it’s Griffindor, Ravenclaw, etc…
The xray thing is unintuitive, especially since it’s on top of another clickable device (the cabinet). I had to read on this forum to find out it has a cooldown, all by myself I didn’t find a way to use it even once. Maybe using another mechanism, like a pop-up menu when we invite a girl in or making it a passive ability automatically activated when it’s possible would be better.
The IMVOIS thing is a cool idea but catastrophically implemented. It reads as a law with a lot of rules and exceptions. Just say “there is a magical protection of the female students’ virtue, and while it’s enough to protect them against inexperienced male students a trained wizard can find ways around it”. With that you can remove a painful wall of text and you can hand-wave explanations as you see fit: Here the player can’t go further with a girl because his control is too low, there he has to offer a ring forged in voyeurium to render the girl vulnerable to the xray spell without triggering the IMVOIS and so on.
As for the text being too long, I have a different opinion from most of the other posters on that forum so I will have to write something which is also quite long (sorry) to explain my points.
The problem is not that there is too much text, the problem is it’s not about the right stuff. There are so much things about the school politics which we don’t care about, it should be kept minimal. On the other hand it’s a training game, meaning it’s all about turning innocent and proud girls into submissive bitches in heat. It’s not only about seeing boobs, it’s about the girls REALLY not wanting to show their boobs but being manipulated into showing them anyway. We have to feel the struggle of the girls, their shame and awe while they wriggle like flies in the web of a carefully elaborated plan before reluctantly giving up, all the while they are unable to restrain or even comprehend an unwanted arousal. For that the text has to be convincing, meaning it has to be rather long since there is no shortcut around the negotiations and justifications, arguments and counter arguments, pretexts and rationalizations needed to describe the reluctance of the girls and how it’s overcome.
Let me give you an example. For the Hermione’s puzzle she accepts almost right away the bet, she only says she won’t get totally naked. She even offers a bonus in case of big success! It’s so off her character, there is no way a girl as prude as Hermione would accept an obvious sexual bet from the get go from a man she barely knows, let alone overbid.
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