I JUST LOVE IT
I love everything, the characters, their characters, the story and the way of unfolding it, the rhythm, the fact of not having a main character but three, the transparent swimsuit. It's a total success. I already found DoD fantastic but it is even better (I also liked the appartion of Dana and Chris).
What I didn't liked was this discussion with the doctor at the bar. Not being English I may not be well understood. If it was in the style of DoD role playing with the famous Lois / Luthor it was less successful. Generally speaking, it is the doctor that I find the less successful, it is perhaps these expressions of the face that do not speaks to me. (otherwise the bottle made me scream with laughter)
otherwise, 4 small mistakes that I noticed. If it can help:
* error on the head displayed when christine is on the stairs to join matteo and meets nadine. It's the head of Kelly while it should be the head of christine
* same mistake during the massage: face of the doctor instead of that of the masseuse lana
* after fucking with matteo, when she goes to the shower "that was ... that was" the name is "Andrew" instead of Christine, and the other 2 dialogs then even mistake
* positioning of the text at the very beginning, when christine parsed, the text is shifted upwards
otherwise, as I already said, I think you should think about what I said on the comic bubbles, it would bring a lot to the immerssion, rather than read "Kelly Thoughts".
I've made a little image :