Okay, few thoughts.
The writing is... passable. It's not good, the English isn't good, but it's okay.
The renders are about the same, one or two errors in regards to clothing.
All in all, this could become quite a good game, with a bit more work on the writing. Like Alice wears a dress when her boyfriend shows up and in the next render she is in her lingerie.
Two things I felt were weird.
1. Why would you show the MC's giant, humongous dick about 10 times with the same render in the shower.
It's absolutely not necessary. Show it if something comes out of it, meaning a girl comes in or something or at least he fantasizes about one.
2. Does the MC really think the moment Alice's face is covered in your cum is when you should tell her she looks beautiful?
Because tbh, she looked rather gross in that moment.